ESL RPG
Here we test Tabletop RPGs as English practice tools, for listeners, speakers, and some fun. Join us to listen and learn, or to laugh and enjoy! The story starts from Episode 3, Character introductions from Episode 12. If you have questions or suggestions, please contact us at: mt.d.english@gmail.com Find our school's Facebook page and join weekly discussions at: https://www.facebook.com/MTenglishSchool/ If you like this podcast, consider supporting us at: https://www.patreon.com/eslrpg
Our heroes clear out the rest of the Redbrand hideout, and take what they can from the area before interrogating those left alive. Those left alive include a crippled wizard, a Goblin named Droop, and...
Real talk, traumatic brain injury is a very serious medical condition, and not a great way to get people to "just sleep" until you need to wake them up. Poor Johnny, apart from the concussion, well... he will never be the same again.
Oh, and his knee is really messed up too.
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So a lot of things happen here. Our players try very hard to violently remove manacles without accidentally removing hands. A boss fight is anticlimactic. Non-lethal divine amputation.
Oh, and an epic battle with a rat!
Also, we have a Patreon here:
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And if you want, check out our Youtube Channel.
Warning, for non-Spanish speakers, do not repeat anything Barfy says. For Spanish speakers... maybe use headphones? And prepare for some bad language.
This episode, traps are the pits, skeletons yield to boney persuasion, heads roll, prisoners are escorted in chains... A lot of stuff happens.
Also, we have a Patreon here:
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And if you want, check out our Youtube Channel.
Our players find their rogue too hungover to join, one of their goblin prisoners secretly hiding sneaky tools, and themselves going under a mansion to find someone with a stick of silicates.
Oh, and the language of Goblins is now Spanish for this game.
Also, we have a Patreon here:
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And if you want, check out our Youtube Channel.
In this episode, the healers charge! And soon discover one of Merphie's Multiple Mandates.
No, seriously, it gets crazy. Like, really crazy. Everyone has fun with it, but thinks maybe there would have been less crazy ways to deal with it.
Oh, and Sildar is still toothless!
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Our players first get a history lesson on Phandelver, then find some other information by asking around.
They meet a boy named Carp who doesn't drink. Then they meet a voice that asks for meat.
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This time, our players decide information is best, so they... persuade information out of their captured Redbrand. With blood.
They also encounter the town Mayor, Quimbey Kennedy (Yes, really). Then meet up with a Mr. Edermath to try and get some more information.
Also, we have a Patreon here:
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And if you want, check out our Youtube Channel.
In this episode, our character are introduced to a shady individual with some money for buying things they have, a job for them to do, and some interesting, insinuative, and possibly insulting things to say. Advice too.
And there is a fight in the street with some ruffians. That leads to repeated stabbing and possible torture futures.
Tune in later for when people continue their shopping!
Oh, and no direct cursing, but some mildly dirty implications. I promise we actually cut out the worst of it.
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And if you want, check out our Youtube Channel.
This time, our heroes arrive in Phandalin. They immediately choose to get a street urchin guided tour of town to go around selling off their loot, completing their quests, and buying new weapons.
Nobody mentioned the goblins coming with them, but they did bring up the ears they carry.... a lot....
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In this episode, more combat happens, more rolls are fumbled, more creative ways to use spellcasters are found, Elton Beerbottle imitates Elton John, some old people are found, "totally-not-slavery" begins, and our heroes make their way finally to Phandalin! Carrying all the stuff looted from the caves. Just all of it.
In this episode, medics tank, choking fails, a shirt is holey, a puppy is bad, and... ok, that is totally not a lion riding a seal. I promise.
Also, we have a Patreon here:
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And if you want, check out our Youtube Channel.
In this episode, our heroes continue after a rest to heal up. They get to the cave where their friends were taken to, and try to sneak in. Sometimes it works. Sometimes... Well, just listen.
And as a warning, dead goblins become puppy chow.
Also, we have a Patreon here:
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And if you want, check out our Youtube Channel.
In this episode, we start a new adventure, following the Lost Mines of Phandelver module from the Dungeons & Dragons 5th Edition Starter Set!
Our recording quality at the start is... not great. It will get better later, but for now, just bear with us. We were trying new settings in recording that will never be repeated.
Anyway, join our party as Kloog, Eleanor, Theodore, Lady Katrina Sophia Elizabeth Pomodora, and Elton venture off in the exciting world of... guarding wagons full of stuff!
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Not Safe for Work, but who needed telling?
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In this episode, we declare a winner, after many horrible combinations.
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We keep playing Cards Against Humanity!
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WARNING!!! Not safe for work. Anyway, I have said enough, please enjoy!
Made using:
playingcards.io
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Here we cover what games you can play through the internet, and what programs to use to do that.
This is a general overview. We will be doing other videos for detailed guides of how to use those programs.
By the way, it's a video too!
Find it here:
https://youtu.be/3IqXSBM-YO4
Also, we have a Patreon here:
https://www.patreon.com/eslrpg
Resources:
http://battlegroundsgames.com/links/#anchor6
https://www.35srd.com/
https://ogc.rpglibrary.org/index.php?title=Main_Page
https://rpggeek.com/
https://boardgamegeek.com/
https://www.drivethrurpg.com/
https://dnd.wizards.com/products/tabletop-games/rpg-products
https://tabletopia.com/
https://roll20.net/
http://playingcards.io/
https://secrethitler.io/
In this episode, we cover a lot of the tools you need to play tabletop games online. We will cover your low-tech, hardware, and software tools you need to find your students/teachers/family/friends/highly-intelligent-pets/whatever, organize games together, and connect so you can play games. Whether to socialize while you are stuck at home, or to study or practice languages, you can use these tools!
By the way, it's a video too!
Find it here:
Also, we have a Patreon here:
https://www.patreon.com/eslrpg
And for our tools...
Skype: https://www.skype.com/
Discord: https://discordapp.com/
Zoom: https://zoom.us/
Facebook, Twitter, and... Doodle: https://doodle.com/
Our players talk about what they like and don't like with this game!
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Here we discuss how to deal with players leaving the game, what to do if you don't enjoy the game, things to do to make the game better, not-exactly-homework-but-things-you-do-not-while-playing, and play-life balance.
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Here we learn that, among other things, the roleplaying part of this board game was made by Juan, and not a part of the game. We also discuss other ways to adapt it to the classroom.
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Our players take the time to review this playthrough with the game. Suggestions are made for how to maybe improve on it.
We do plan on in the future releasing this one-page one-shot so you can play yourself in the future! But we don't quite have a publishing date planned, yet....
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We were tired, we had no plan, we had no script, and we didn't actually start recording until after we had started talking, so you get to hear how rambling we become, jumping from topic to topic with little sense of direction.
Here, we cover a little of why it is sometimes difficult to use games, the value of vocabulary used in games (not always in the words themselves), how much freedom players should have, and if it is better to have games be more realistic and classroom task focused, or less realistic and more open for student enjoyment.
Kind of, but it goes without saying, this was a late night discussion.
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This episode is particularly for teachers and students, an episode looking at what was most interesting or fun, what was easier to pick up and learn, and recommendations for students who want to try the games, and teachers who want to run them.
Also, there will be some discussion about what to do in future episodes, and some news at the end of this episode.
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Sorry for the late upload, let's jump right in.
Our group of (mostly) bears goes to hit a truck convoy, meets up with a character who will return again, and find the honey.
After that, it's a little fuzzy. And bloody. Accidental mass murder, ankle-deep people juice, and truck drivers singing Britney Spears are all involved. As are conversations between bears and humans.
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This time we try a new game, Honey Heist, by Grant Howitt. In this episode, we introduce the rules, create characters, and plan the first heist.
And yes, someone really says that.
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In this episode, we enter the final months of Germanium and Spring. Our players finish many quests, mention many more innuendoes, and we enter into a dance-off with some danger, and a very horrific situation.
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In this episode, we enter the months of Quadranary and Hogust. Our dudes act like righteous dudes, and some uncool dudes. And the unlikeliest of people save the day. Also, more dirty jokes and innuendos!
Sorry about the length on this episode.
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In this episode, Stick learns why Cal-Cass and Piergeron like clerics so much.
Yes, that seriously happens, and yes, the months so far really are Unnamed, Binary, Tertiary, and June. To be fair, it makes just as much sense with normal English months.
Also, while this episode is completely safe for work, it does include a lot of innuendo.
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On this episode, our players start the game and quickly learn the rules. Also, some rules get troubleshooting.
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In this episode, we start something different. We take a regular board game set in the Dungeons and Dragons universe, and we add role play to it. This board game can honestly be played like Monopoly, with very little talking, which is why our Game Master, Juan, will add his try at a second win condition, to promote more talking and role play.
So let's all learn who these people are, and how they play this game!
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In this episode, our players decide that more detectives are the best way to go. Unfortunately, it doesn't work exactly like they expect.
Also, self-driving cars, and tracking down the killer. And crazy wizards!
Happy New Years, everybody!
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Our heroes start investigating the murder, and the crazy rolls come fast. Also, they decide they need to involve a lot of magical research and magical detectives.
Here are some choice quotes from the episode with no context.
"I'm a construction worker, I'm not dangerous."
"My magic isn't working too well today, I've only had two beers."
"So yeah, one of those poor buggers just went crazy."
"Bibbity Bobbity Boo, roll 1d6."
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Our heroes start an adventure in Los Angeles!
Our heroes get some fish, see some magic, try to Find the Lady, see a murder, and go a little crazy.
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WARNING! Spoilers for the Call of Cthulhu Demo Scenario, "What's In the Cellar?"!!!
Here, the Djinn attacks, people fight and frantically look for a way out. Will they escape? Will they solve the mystery? And will they still be sane when it is all over?
Also, how do you kill a demonic tentacled hellbeast that is only half-corporeal?
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SPOILERS!!! Some Spoilers for the Call of Cthlulhu Demo Scenario, "What's in the Cellar?"!
As our players go underground, the mystery deepens. They see some things that are there that should not be, some things that should be there but aren't, and other things that defy explanation. With time running out, everyone gets a little frantic, and their sanity is tested.
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WARNING!!! Minor Spoilers for the Call of Cthulhu scenario, "What's in the Cellar"
Our players are introduced to this case, a mysterious murder, with one player's cousin as the main suspect! They must find information and evidence for what really happened, hopefully to clear the charges, or at least change a death sentence to life in prison.
Getting into the spirit of things, they spend this game looking at everything they can on the main floor of the cabin. Soon, however, they will enter the cellar where the murder took place.
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Welcome. Our players today try a horror mystery, playing a Demo from Call of Cthulhu, What's in the Cellar. Find this and other free scenarios at the Chaosium website.
Here, our players discuss who will be who, and how you play the game.
We hope this will be the first of many one-shots, with many more to try.
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Our heroes fight for their lives, and survive by the skin of their teeth. They then interrogate a... spider. Then, Master Theologian Arry has to explain why it is not a good idea to send giant spiders off evangelizing.
Yes. Really.
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In a place as dark as night.
Fighting what? Giant bugs.
With poison fangs and stabby legs.
Ok, in all seriousness, they sneak, then charge, then fight, then something very unexpected happens.
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Our party somehow finish the fight between the hunters and the dryad! Apparently, Arry has the best words? Anyway, they also venture deeper into the woods, and hear the tale of a man who lost a sword. Oh, his brother. He's lost too.
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In this episode, negotiations between the hunters, the dryad, and the group break down to fighting. It goes... long and badly... with a lot of down and up and down and up.
And it doesn't actually end this episode! So, tune in for the end!
By the way, new thank yous for the Patrons!
Also, we have a Patreon here:
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And if you want, check out our Youtube Channel.
In this episode, we continue the adventures of Meg Ryan, in which Meg has a possibly prophetic dream, Arry makes pancakes, everyone makes progress on the road, they make lunch in a town that vaguely tolerates them, and they meet a dryad and hunter who don't tolerate each other at all.
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In this episode, combat fails to end quickly, in no small part because of quickly-moving shoes, and conversations get confused.
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Our heroes leave on their quest to take some bandit scalps, and meet an interesting little man along the way.
Along the way, they scramble to blend in and be accepted by the bandits.
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We return to Jeff's Door, this game introducing a new Player!
Scott joins us playing as Sturm, a bear-loving barbarian!
Join us next time for our other new player, Oleg!
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In this episode, Turn Undead is used correctly, we fight what's left, and people fail at hitting things a lot. Again.
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In this episode, our group goes to a bar. There, they find a bard with an offer, and Arry drinks, because he needs a drink. Then, everyone goes to explore a canyon. There, they find a boy and help him find his dog, only it's not just a dog, and not really a boy. After that confusing situation, they walk into another confusing situation of a man with many skeletons. It did not go well.
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Our players talk with a woman about medicine for making a kobold better, wrap up lizards like babies, ask too many questions about houses under water, probably cheat at riddles, learn about bad things in the worst way possible, create a sad weapon of mass destruction, question the morality of gods, and have a crying bro hug.
A lot of things happen in this one side quest, ok?
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We return to Jeff's Door! Our players try to negotiate what to do with the three people in the backpack. Including the dead one.
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Another fight! It seems like these happen a lot. There is much discussion over what to do with people, how many people can fit inside the backpack of a creature that can carry small cars, when something is cute and when it is evil, and rewards, because QUEST DONE!!!! Oh, and dream-time.
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This time, our heroes find a valley of tombs, an anxious young man, a pointy object, and graves not worth robbing.
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The group goes down the last passageway, and find something interesting in a large chamber. They also find yet another fight, but this one doesn't go nearly as quickly or smoothly as before.
Anyway, they also find something to do with that kobold.
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This episode, our players search all but one of the rooms. Along the way, they find gold, spider guts, bottles of unknown stuff, and some kobolds.
Which of course means they fight.
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In this episode, Meg Ryan's group goes down into the depths of the mine. They find a bridge. They cross a bridge. They find many rooms. And as they enter one... they are attacked!
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Our heroes set a new personal record for a round of combat. And then go looking for a young man who wants his knife.
Oh, and player conversations get derailed by how difficult dragons really are, and speculating on an evil campaign.
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Our heroes fight the bounty hunter, and experience a wide variety of luck!
Although, it all gets rather Shakespearean.
And everyone goes to the mine!
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In this episode, people talk with the mayor, taverns are visited, directions are taken literally, and the party sees a giant head on the way to Nashkel Mines.
And they just can't make friends, so they have another fight on their hands.
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We are back with the adventures of Meg Ryan! Our players set Sabazios to an autopilot controlled by the elder gods. Then, they visit a temple, find more quests, find a helmet and potions, and travel on to Nashkel.
It looks like they are headed for the mine!
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This time, we experience our shortest combat so far, help the man who is a chicken, talk with the wizard about his goods, and discuss something special for Arry with the blacksmith.
Slowly catching up on the backlog, now everything until April is up! Next up will be a session of Heroes of New Cydonia, then our first one-shot with Call of Cthulhu!
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In this episode, everyone finally gets lunch. Then, they go to High Hedge in search of one sword, find another sword, and then help a chicken.
Seriously. Next one, some kind of quest to finish helping the chicken.
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In this episode, Silky tries to solve her problems with stabbing, Heagle tries to solve his problems with forced prayer, Jan tries to solve his problems with stabbing and theft, Meg tries to solve her problems with magic, the guys with the jewels try to solve their problems with swords, Arry tries to solve his problems with gorilla arms, and strangely, an accidental death leads to people talking nicely and debating what to do with gems and gold.
After talking, everyone decides lunch is best.
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In this episode, there is a problem with a bill, everyone thinks about lunch, flowers are given, someone is looking for mercenaries, and everyone has a confusing and suspicious conversation.
Next time, another fight! Because of course fighting.
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In this episode, our heroes fight off the ambush! This leads to first one philosophical question that tests the party when they take prisoners, then another philosophical question when it is time to return the spoils.
What happens next? That's a new game session, so let's find out together!
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In this episode, our heroes fight the spider queen, Arry makes an awful joke, people pillage barrels full of rain water, and a spider corpse with a flower bundle makes an old woman happy. Some how.
Next up, Ambush!
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In this episode, our heroes talk to a man about a sword, find the house with the spiders, find many spiders inside the house, make one smile, make a mess, and clean it up.
But it seems there is still a fight to be had.
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Our heroes fight off yet another assassin! It seems like this will be a recurring thing! They also argue about fighting, argue with a bartender about who can and can't drink, have breakfast, go shopping for weapons and information, and find a mysterious person they should track down.
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It has been a long time, so this episode starts with a summary. After that, our heroes travel to Beregost to complete the quest of the spiders. They find a lot of things along the way, bury some bodies, and meet someone who is not so friendly in a bar.
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We went overboard, but on the plus-side, established George Carlin rules for what words you can't say on the podcast.
Also, just so many tits.
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In this episode, A crying halfling tells her story, there are no hugs, there is an impromptu vocabulary lesson, lots of things are searched for, and players discuss the beliefs of their characters and how that affects their play.
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In this episode, the ogre sleeps tonight, the players argue, gold is gotten, and meat is eaten.
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This time, a dagger is pulled, an ogre is sorry, Arry is confused, Sabazios is frustrated, the woods are explored, and belts are spotted on an angry not-good ogre.
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Here the adventure begins, with an escape from Candlekeep for... Wait, the main character is really named Meg Ryan?
...Ok... And while escaping she meets... a half-crazed hermit elf?
Well, I have heard weirder partners on the road...
Anyway, they find their way to a safe tavern where... An ex-merchant halfling who runs around in a what????
And a flowery... WHAT?!
I think the knife might be the most normal thing this time.
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Finishing up our lineup of characters, Mai puts the final touches on her wizard, and Ryan builds a Lovecraftian warlock.
Next time will be the first adventure, with our characters meeting up!
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Here, we meet our first characters, as three of our players put them together.
Yup, this is another long character creation upload. And there will be one more, hopefully not so long!
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After a long break, we are back with a new game series! Don't worry, The Teacher's Campaign and Heroes of New Cydonia will continue, as will short one-shots as they happen.
In this episode, Jeffrey introduces his idea for a campaign based off a video game from the 90s and a version of Dungeons and Dragons from the 80s, updated to the modern day with 5th edition, and rule and story updates to hopefully make it work in a tabletop setting.
We leave the happy-go-lucky lands of the Teacher's Campaign, and Vince's creation inspired by Discworld, and adventure into the Forgotten Realms, a world with more in common with video games of the 80s, 90s, and early 2000s, and inspired by the Lord of the Rings. Our players choose who will be the main character, and who will be support, and one character is introduced, Arry. No, that is not the voice that will be used for him for the game, but yes, he will talk like that... probably for the whole campaign. He will be a good pally-din.
As far as explanations for the long absence, yes, part of it was planned around a gap in recordings. The recordings for The Teacher's Campaign will resume, but for several weeks, there will be a drop in quality due to equipment failures during two of the games. We are exploring ways to make it work better in the future.
But the planned gap was only a couple of weeks, so why has it been a month? Life. Our editor getting sick, then exam season, then tax season... life. C'est la vie. We will try and plan around such foreseeable difficulties in the future. Please bear with us, and thank you for your patience.
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Here our heroes try to save the day, do some accidental cooking, and a certain god makes a return.
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In this episode, our heroes encounter a lot of craziness, Charon questions her sanity, and a smart old woman is smart.
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This time, our heroes enter the party, and encounter a badly done French accent, a badly done Russian accent, a horrible Scottish accent, and an oddly not so bad old Southern Matron accent.
Also, they mingle in the party, try to persuade the old woman into giving up the book, and make a decision with disastrous results!
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In this episode, our heroes decide to train so they can get ready to get the magical thing, and decide to find out more about this magical thing and where it is. They find out about where it is, who protects it, they find a name for it, and a way in to maybe get it. And all it took was many days of work.
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This time, our heroes swap some alcohol for some information, and find a connection to their pasts in their future quest. And to get ready for that quest and a little more used to their powers, they decide to do some training. There are mixed results, some cute, some funny, some just weird.
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We are back to our Heroes of New Cydonia campaign! First, Jerry must find the gang, but no one is at the hideout! It seems Nasher and Frankie went to another bank, and Mika and Omar went looking for Shoe. After everyone meeting at the corner of many coffee shops, they go to Jimsburg to talk to Dale about finding Shoe.
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Here are the bloopers from the last several episodes. We will likely return to ICONS, but for now will return to the original Dungeons and Dragons campaign
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On this week's episode, our heroes go clothes shopping, electronics shopping, and home and garden shopping.
Ok, I know that doesn't sound exciting, but I promise it is. There will be exciting things.
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In this episode, our heroes escape into the wilderness, meet a mysterious stranger, find an even more mysterious and stranger business card, go back into Haven, and one of our heroes are dragged away.
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Happy New Year!
On this week's episode, the return of the Magical Toilet, a leader named Jerry, cleanup at the bank, the police arrive, Frankie is Frankie, Omar is Omar, and people get out.
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On this week's episode, our heroes are out of the toilet, a questionable amount of force is applied, the group has some in-fighting, the police are on the way, and someone drools in a bullet-wound.
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In this episode, the game starts off! Four of the group meet in a bank, then meet a god (Not Kubrick) in the toilet, and get superpowers. But what will they do with those superpowers? That's gonna be interesting. By the way, I apologize for Not Kubrick and Shew (Omar's brother) sounding so similar. That was confusing for some of our other players too. I will probably try a different voice in the future if Shew returns, but for this week and next week, just remember, no more Not Kubrick outside of the toilet (and great advice for DMs, have extra voices ready for random characters all the time. Just in case. You never know when a new character will show up. I know you are basically god in these games, but you still don't always know.)
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In this episode, the players roll stats for their characters, the dice-gods summon a game breaker, the world is introduced in more detail, questions are asked, and options are laid for how the campaign might progress. Next week, our characters will choose their powers, and form their teams.
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So those things that should not be? Dinosaurs. They were dinosaurs. One gets mocked to death.
Later, an interesting encounter with some people with a very stony demeanor.
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Our heroes make it to the base of Copper Mountain, learn why it is called Copper Mountain, meet some nice people named Widow and Bachelor, who tell them about a dragon named Bob.
They also hear about some Goliaths engaging in a bad idea, chase after them, and discover signs of a thing that should not be.
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Our characters continue their trip with some mushroom soup.
Things get normal for our players, which is not normal for our characters.
Heads up, next will be a bit of a jump in time! Our backlog will still be a major thing we will work on, but following this recording, we will get into a Quarantine Special, where we test all kinds of tools and games for people learning or practicing from in your home. So for all of you stuck not going anywhere, stick with us.
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Here is our first episode on the new recording software!
Our heroes return going right into a fight. They fight the hobgoblin, and our players quickly forget why they were fighting.
So, they decide to do a timejump the next time we play this game, and instead go on a non sequitur adventure. Involving mushrooms.
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In this episode, an ill-advised fight goes forward, Bob joins in, a book gets wet, then dry again, popcorn is eaten, things are shared out, and a direction is set for where our heroes go.
And our heroes make too many "That's what she said" jokes, and Nobody gets confused.
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Alright. Some introductions. Nobody, Somebody, Father Jack, Kit, and Kyoko are gods, and characters from a previous campaign set more than 500 years before. Kit is a druid dragon puppy god of all things chaotic in nature, Kyoko is a winged-elf god of hunters and people whose common sense goes largely ignored, Father Jack absolutely is a mix of Aries, Dionysus, and Catholicism (ok, not really Catholicism, but definitely extra alcoholism), Nobody is an ex-gnome tinkering trickster god of assassins, and Somebody is the voice of conscience and reason inside his head made god incarnate. It's a lot of weird stuff.
Also part of that canon? Father Jack has died (a few times) already from old age, and was sent back to the material plane for causing too much havoc in the afterlife. As for Nobody, he could only be reincarnated after dying of old age... and the dice gods spoke, giving both him and Somebody new bodies, of a Wood Elf, and an elvish Tiefling.
Ok, introductions out of the way, our players negotiate for payment for the book, find out something unsettling, and win minor victories over these gods. Oh, and Dreg starts a fight again. With Nessie.
Look forward to the next one!
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As the fight finishes up, the players loot, and do... other stuff. Because Bob needs information, Shagrat needs to relax, and bodies need to... disappear...
WARNING! This recording features some mild descriptions of torture and drug use.
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This episode is a very long combat, because it is the Frog-Licking Paladins plus The Four. Who are really 5 people. And our group are not paladins, and don't lick frogs. Oh, don't lick frogs, kids.
Anyway, some of that will be explained during combat, which is very confusing and involves lots of flying body parts.
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The Frog-Licking Paladins make trees bend, use the not at all cliched technique of pretending to be prisoners, give some people some coffee, and walk through water. Well, not all of them.
Next time, it's back to the adventures of Meg Ryan's merry band.
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Our heroes are finally ready to go. They head to Muskegon, a port town a long way away. But when they get there, they face a city occupied by enemies! How will they deliver this package to the boat? Why is Bob a tree? Can tigers solve problems?
Also, what is a legless horse beanbag chair?
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Welcome back to the adventures of the Frog-Licking Paladins!
After collecting the materials for the secret box to hide the magical energy coming from the evil magic book, and freeing the town named That Town, our adventurers prepare to take the book away so it can be destroyed.
But that means they need to travel a long, long, long way away. 1 week each way. So away for at least 2 weeks. If there are no delays....
It sounds like everyone needs to prepare for a long trip, and Bob and Korgan need their secret businesses ready to run.
Hooray, exciting preparation!
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In this episode, our players forget characters' names, decide torture works best when you ask questions, go looking for gold and prizes, and plan what to do later.
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In this episode, Bob gets dark, a formidable foe is faced, insults fly, and folk die. Yup. Just so slowly and horribly.
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Branch hallways are investigated, arguments are had, plans are made, and the team meet the guild under the guild in the guild hall. And start surprise negotiations. With many distractions.
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In this episode, the bear goes away peacefully while scaring everyone, the giant golden retriever returns, Korgan and Shagrat do something very competitive and also very disgusting, and the bread leads the way. Also, a secret passage up to somewhere!
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Exactly what the title says. Our noble adventurers invade a bakery, and encounter a very unusual patron. To be fair, there are no bear puns.
But pants get soiled, people hide, fire happens, someone gets slashed, and... well, just listen.
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On this episode, the bar fight is finished rather abruptly, the gang travel to Whitehall, and find a debate about the realistic nature of a fake real cow. Because magic. Also job interviews. Because Bob and Korgan have a side-business that needs running.
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Our intrepid band of adventurers sit down at a bar, and plan a return to Whitehall and the mage's guild together with Harold! But it seems adventure comes to them, with a rowdy barfight of over 30 people! Will Bob burn people? Will Alton punch people? Will Korgan stab people? What about Dreg and Erwin?
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I said last time, that recording got downright raunchy. Now you can see a bit what I mean!
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Warning! This episode contains a lot of suggestion of sexual situations (but none actually.) The dirtiest things were removed before upload, to later be included in a bloopisode.
In this episode, Shagrat and Dreg visit a seamstress, Bob visits a bar, negotiations with apothecaries, fishermen, and lawyers happen, and Dreg attracts the attention of many, many, many women.
Consider this an episode to warn you to maintain control of the story in the classroom.
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On this episode, Bob meets Harry, then James, Dreg fights Red, and Shagrat comes in at an inopportune moment, all leading to a possibly interesting proposal.
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This time, on ESL RPG, there is a fight underground, people are tied up, people meet up, and people get confused. Bob. Bob gets confused.
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In this episode, first we try a new system for the episode preview. Let us know what you think!
Also, going through the traps, meeting the boss, the temptation of sooooo much gold, and, punchity punch punch.
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This week we start with news of good things for the future, hopefully. But new equipment means going through old recordings very fast!
In this episode, better plans than just attacking big scary guards at the doors are made, the party is split up for sleeping reasons, and Korgan, Erwin, and Alton try to infiltrate the thieves' guild. Will they succeed? Only one way to find out!
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In this episode, we are introduced to our heroes. Yeah, that's it really. I hope these characters will... well, do something.
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Our group of players will try a short one-shot campaign while our friends in America are busy. For this campaign, we will be trying ICONS, a superhero RPG. You can find out more about ICONS at: https://icons.miraheze.org/wiki/Main_Page You can also find the open content for the system at: https://ogc.rpglibrary.org/index.php?title=Icons
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This episode is a massive, two session bloopisode. It includes many cries of "Proprietary!", several bleeps, so many double entendres, and things that just made us laugh in the worst possible ways, so be careful. Also, this episode ends with an announcement. The gist of the announcement is that from next week, a new game will be tested. Expect a new story, new ways to create characters, and an analysis at the end of this one shot.
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On this episode, a narrow escape, information gathered, supplies collected, and plans started. There will be a gap until the next story episode, so from next week, enjoy bloopers!
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Our band of possibly heroes make marketing pitches, and heroic but ill-advised decisions, as Korgan and Bob convince someone to sell products for them, and Dreg and Shagrat try to take on a thieves' guild all by themselves.
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In this episode, our party arrives at their destination, they learn more about the local geography, thieves are caught, drinks are had, and marketing is leveled.
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On this episode of ESL RPG, something big comes out of the woods, a trap is set, big scary things all around, something goes woof, and people get fed. Oh, and the group continues on to the town, to possibly finish the first part of their quest (next time)
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On this week's episode, Alton goes crazy, we finally leave, getting ready to sleep, questionable things to sleep with, and maybe human tetris
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On this week's episode, it's back to the campaign. Korgan proves to be a greedy negotiator, Bob Jr. gets some skin on his bones (kinda), 320 pounds of gold flies through the air, and... a fetch quest!
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Here we meet our characters, hear their stories, the story of the world, and we learn how everyone got on the road to this tavern in the first place.
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On this week's episode of ESL RPG, our heroes meet back in the tavern after... well, much longer than an afternoon. Shagrat explodes, Korgan reluctantly dances with wolves, Alton falls asleep again, and Erwin and Dreg (not Greg) talk about plants.
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This episode is a return to the tavern, with serious conversations between our team, between the exploding barn, and the search for Marcello. Also, the team looks for Alton, finds a temple, and blacklists Bob from the temple.
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On this week's episode, Finding Marcello, The Search for Bob Jr., some selfish squirrels, a very stupid mugger and his much smarter friends, and some special underwear. And yes, this episode is numbered correctly. In two weeks, a conversation from before this episode will be uploaded.
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On this episode of ESL RPG, the Pied Piper of Skeletons, an interesting and questionable experiment, the best reason to make bad decisions, a barn goes boom, a possible new companion runs away, the team returns to the bar.
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On this episode, Alton runs off to the monastery, the team return to the barn, we actually learn people's names, skeleton rats, a skeleton minotaur, and maybe a new friend.
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A barn aflame, a giant good boy, one more party member, flying bones, a sudden cutoff, and bloopers! Also, the dog makes a return.
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A stash of secrets, a face of fire, and the best reason to join a group ever, come together to make a great start. Also coming together, new editing style, small technical difficulties, and "What? Yes, we are recording this for a podcast." And a dog that just wants to play.
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This episode covers character creation, and forming parties before games start. On this episode, a character is created, a small party is formed, and someone looks down while looking up.
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What it says in the title! Do not listen around small children or bosses. Now come here how bad my Spanish really is!
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What it says in the title!
May feature cursing, swearing, innuendo, etc.
Yeah, so when our professionalism slipped, or we got far off topic, or needed things clarified, or cursed, or let loose the hounds of sexual innuendo more than usual.... all that go here.
Look! It's Bloopers! Where we say all the bad stuff we can't include in the normal podcast!
Or the philosophical discussions.
Or the rules lawyering.
Or... other stuff....
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Here are all the bloopers from the latest Jeff's Door game! And some of it is just rules lawyering and philosophy!
Yes, that is the reason it is so long. Lots of lawyering and philosophy.
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Bloopers, distractions, rules-lawyering, and explaining the orgy. This part is actually pretty safe for work, the rest less so.
There's a few things Not Safe For Work here. You know the drill.
Our bears go on another heist, meet some competition, and BAMBOO!!!! FINALLY!!!!!
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Bloopers again! Not for children or work!
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As the title says. We actually spent a lot of time playing with Buffrat. A lot. Like a lot a lot. Like we decided to bring him back in other future games, a lot.
This is how popular NPCs and DMPCs are born. This is also how monsters of hilarity are created. Enjoy!
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In this episode, we return to the Heroes of New Cydonia campaign! Our heroes left off having firebombed an orphanage by not listening to directions, and start off by un-firebombing said orphanage. Along the way, they will run into a character that may end up recurring in other games. Because we grew to like him very much.
This will become a little bit of a problem with some DMPCs for us.
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Same rules as always, some bad words, so be careful where you listen!
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In this episode, our players go off to Copper Mountain, Magical Fed Ex, a magic tattoo, they get hired, demonstrate politeness with dead horses, get in a big fight, and fail horribly at sneaking.
Tune in next time for a return to Heroes of New Cydonia!
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Bloopers again, don't listen at work or with kids!
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Currently, our content is listed on Patreon as Adult Content, making it unsearchable. This can't be helped, as one of our Patron Rewards is unedited episodes we have recorded. But, you can follow this link here:
As always, there are a lot of things you don't want to play around kids or at work. But also, there may be a lot of boring rule stuff.
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Here are the bloopers for our Harry Potter Homebrew!
As always, don't listen around children or at work, because adult language will be put here. On purpose. Because of course it would be.
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We are back to trying new games. This time, a very new game, one we are working on ourselves! The idea is, what if Call of Cthulhu met Harry Potter? What if Muggles and Wizards were each other's technology or beings so alien they cannot be understood?
Anyway, our players make characters and learn all the rules that fit on one page!
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There's the bloopers, and here is the general warning! Don't listen at work or around children.
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Here you will find all the jokes, references, curses, and other things we had to cut.
Do NOT listen to this at work or around kids!
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Here are all your bloopers for listening to at home! Seriously! Not at work, people!
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Here are the bloopers, don't listen at work, or near kids, or... eh, I think you know how it works now.
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Exactly what it says in the title. Don't listen at work or around kids, etc.
Also, expect some small delays due to a long typhoon weekend and university starting up again messing with the upload schedule.
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Here are the bloopers from the Heroes game! WARNING!!! Not safe for work, public, children, etc.
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Here is the blooper reel where I just don't care about censorship anymore. So I can't say this enough, NOT FOR KIDS OR WORK!!!!
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Here we are at our cutest, most talking about babies, most disgustingly wrong, and most off topic. Enjoy, but maybe not at work.
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Here is the most recent batch of bloopers, complete with some from episodes yet to be released! Don't worry, no spoilers, just so many questions.
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On this weeks episode, The 1s return, muggers turned in, loot looked through, Marcello is returned, Bob Jr. is found, the price of a book, and secrets... Also, bloopers.
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Thank you for downloading and listening! Here is the first episode answering many questions, like, Who are these crazy people? What is this weird idea? Why should I listen? and, What are you even thinking? Bonus question answered! Where is this podcast going in the future?
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