Welcome to Undone Redone, the podcast that talks the messiness of life…addiction and infidelity…grace and reconciliation…marriage and family…authenticity and faith. Tray and Mel are a couple that know a thing or two about messy and who are thrilled that their divorce did not work out! Let's talk about scandalous grace! All show notes and more of their story at http://www.undoneredone.com.
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Melody sits down with author Kristen Jenson to discuss protecting our children from pornography exposure. Kristen tells parents how to start a conversation with their kids about the dangers of pornography and how to empower them to reject it altogether. Kristen is the founder of Protect Young Minds and best-selling author of Good Pictures Bad Pictures: Porn-Proofing Today’s Young Kids and Good Pictures Bad Pictures Jr.: A Simple Plan to Protect Young Minds. Through her book, Jenson helps parents teach children what porn is and what children should do when they encounter it. Our listeners can learn more about Kristen by visiting https://www.protectyoungminds.org/.
On this episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray sits down with Kimball Lewis, CEO of EmpoweringParents.com to discuss parenting during the pandemic. Kimball lays out the process of how parents can properly instruct and work with their children through the pandemic. This includes using technology for both classes and entertainment, how parents can set guidelines for their kids while learning from home, and how to properly discipline them if boundaries are crossed. Our listeners can learn more about Kimball and his ministry by visiting EmpoweringParents.com.
On this episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody are finally back to usher in Season 9 of the show! They discuss the many projects and courses they have been working on since the start of 2021, and what the future holds for The Undone Redone Podcast.
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with returning guest John Lynch to discuss his new book, On My Worst Day: The Narrative Changes When Redemption Enters In, and the performance treadmill so many men and women find themselves on when pursuing their faith. John talks about getting out of this orphaned mindset that many men fall into, that God is not just standing on the sidelines wringing His hands and shaking His head at us. John then asks our listeners "What if every single moment of every single day—He had been magnificently redeeming your worst days into your best ones?" Our listeners can learn more about John on his website. https://www.johnlynchspeaks.com/, and purchase On My Worst Day here on amazon, https://www.amazon.com/My-Worst-Day-Narrative-Redemption/dp/1775246892.
Tray and Melody are joined on this episode by author Laine Craft to tell her story of starting her marriage again from scratch. Laine shares how she and her husband Steve worked through years of strife and hardship to reform their marriage in order to find a new, more healthy “dance” together. Laine also explains how she has walked with thousands of women who have faced everything from abuse and betrayal to simply "falling out of love" with their spouse and how God teaches us to pick up the pieces and start again from scratch.
Our listeners can learn more about Laine as well as purchase her books by visiting lainelawsoncraft.com.
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray chats with authors Dan Britton and Jimmy Page to discuss their latest book, Wisdom Walks, and the four relationships men must have in their lives. Dan and Jimmy break down these four relationships: The Walker, The Warrior, The Watchman, and The Workman, and how we can use these four relationships to become the best version of ourselves and to maximize our emotional connection with others. They also discuss what it means to walk purposefully with Jesus and begin to live a life of meaning and significance that we were created for.
Our listeners can learn more about Dan and Jimmy as well as purchase their book Wisdom Walks by visiting http://www.wisdomwalks.org/.
On this week's show, Tray and Mel have a conversation with Joe and Hilarie Barry about surviving infidelity. Hilarie courageously shares what it was like to be blindsided by Joe's infidelity, the emotional rollercoaster of partner betrayal, and how she deals with the resulting PTSD-like symptoms.
Joe speaks about his need for help in getting well, working through his addiction, and what his journey to recovery has looked like. Today, they speak with other couples dealing with infidelity and show that there is hope and healing after the pain of betrayal.
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with returning guest Sharon Hersh to discuss belonging. Sharon asks our listeners an important question, "What would happen if you declared that life is not all about your pain, your accomplishments, your abuse, or your rights?" She helps us explore what could happen in each of us if we bravely embrace the truth of the innate worthiness and welcome God freely offers to all. Our listeners can learn more about Sharon and pick up her book "Belonging" by visiting her website: http://www.sharonhersh.com/
Author Gordon Dalbey joins Tray on this week’s episode to discuss his seminal book for men, Healing the Masculine Soul. Gordon shares his thoughts about why so many men struggle with their masculinity and how true manhood is discovered and the power to walk it out in our lives. He explains that the source of men's struggles is multifaceted…from our current throwaway culture surrounding divorce, the rapid spread and abuse of pornography, to the sense of shame that often gets masked by excessive self righteousness and pride.
This week Tray sits down with author and coach GS Youngblood. GS Youngblood is the author of the book The Masculine in Relationship and a coach who teaches men how to learn to live, love, and lead in their partnerships. He walks our listeners through the 3-Part blueprint to develop a masculine core in their relationship and learn that the model of masculine power doesn't have to encroach on their wives and their feminine power.
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody chat with Ian Cron, the “champion of the Enneagram”. Ian is the best-selling author of the book The Road Back To You and host of the popular podcast, Typology. Ian shares his personal story—a journey that led him through pain, cynicism, and restoration—and ultimately into the Enneagram. In this interview, Ian explains the 9 types of people identified by the Enneagram and how our personalities are powerfully influenced by our motivations.
From identifying self-awareness to working with the ego and learning to not take oneself too seriously, Ian gives our listeners the tools they need to better understand where they fall on the Enneagram and what they can learn as a result of this knowledge.
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray sits down with author Bruce Pagano to discuss his newest book, Three Commands: Jesus' Fulfillment of the Law Through Love, and what it truly means to love one another, especially after infidelity. He shares the story that lead him to write the book and how he is using it to minister to others throughout the country as a professional counselor. Bruce also talks about how loving each other as members of Christ’s body unlocks the fullness of a relationship with God, which equips us to lead others into His kingdom.
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody talk with author and speaker Randy Hemphill as he shares his story of going through the trauma of betrayal as a man. Randy shares his experience with grieving through his betrayal and how important it is for men to allow themselves to properly grieve after experiencing infidelity in marriage. He also shares that there comes a time in every man's journey with God where tips and techniques on how to be better simply do not work. Instead of trying to change ourselves through willpower and effort, Randy reminds us that only God can bring about lasting heart-change.
You can learn more about Randy's ministry and purchase his new book, The Restored Man: Becoming a Man of God, by visiting https://therestoredman.com/.
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody chat with author and speaker Sharon Hersh. Sharon shares the idea that addiction can be a gift and that oftentimes the areas that are shattered by trauma and betrayal are the areas that needed to be addressed in a marriage. Sharon explains it does not excuse the abuser for creating the trauma in the relationship, but that the brokenness that comes from addiction helps to create a new paradigm in the relationship that can be the catalyst to break free from addiction as a whole.
Ms. Hersh received an M.A. from Colorado Christian University, and is a Licensed Professional Counselor. She is the mother of two college-aged children and she is a frequent speaker at universities, seminaries, conferences, and retreats. Sharon has written numerous books such as Bravehearts: Unlocking the Courage to Love with Abandon, Mom, Sex Is No Big Deal, and The Last Addiction. Our listeners can learn more about Sharon by visiting http://www.sharonhersh.com/ and purchase her books on Amazon. This a phenomenal episode for anyone struggling in their marriage and we strongly recommend you check out Sharon's Book, The Last Addiction on Amazon.
On this week’s episode of the Undone Redone podcast, Marnie Ferree returns to talk about healing from betrayal trauma with Melody. Marnie is the founder of Bethesda Workshops, a program that specializes in providing a place of healing for those damaged by pornography and other forms of sexual addiction.
She and Melody discuss how women that have experienced betrayal can begin to rebuild their lives after their trust is shattered. Marnie then explains that we all need help in walking through our addictions and our wounds.
Our listeners can get access to all of Marnie's resources at https://www.bethesdaworkshops.org/
Quotes from this episode:
“Forgiveness is an intellectual decision not an emotional one. That means you make a conscious choice no matter how you feel. You may still be angry, yet you forgive. You may still be in pain, but you forgive. You may still be wearing the scars of the abuse, but you forgive.” - Marnie Ferree
"Very often, it is the recognition of betrayal by a spouse that helps to illuminate a woman's story." - Marnie Ferree
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Melody chats with Dr. Sheri Keffer about the impact of betrayal trauma and the path forward to recovery. Dr. Sheri Keffer received her PhD in Marriage and Family Therapy and her Master of Arts Theology, both from Fuller Theological Seminary. She currently specializes in individual, couples and family therapy at her private practice in Newport Beach, California.
She explains how the trauma of betrayal affects our minds, bodies, spirits, and sexuality. Dr. Keffer also provides women new tools they can utilize when dealing with emotional triggers and helps educate on the realities of sexual addiction. Finally, she shows women how they can begin practicing self-care, develop healthy boundaries, protect themselves from abuse or manipulation, and discover freedom from the burden of shame and guilt.
Our listeners can learn more about Dr. Sheri Keffer by going to her website: https://drsherikeffer.com/.
Quotes from this Interview:
“A partner who is betrayed needs two things that are critical to heal: safety and truth. Until they have those two things, a betrayed partner cannot settle into their body.” - Sheri Keffer
“The first step of recovery, whether you are staying with your partner or not, is recovery for yourself.” -Sheri Keffer
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On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray chats with Wendell Moss, a therapist at The Allender Center, to share his story and to specifically discuss racial trauma.
The conversation about racial injustice in America is currently dominating conversations and Wendell breaks down his own experiences with racial trauma and how he was able to work through and heal from those traumas. He also explains what we as a country can do to begin listening and engaging the conversation to help those struggling with racial injustice.
Our listeners can learn more about Wendell on The Allender Center's website: https://theallendercenter.org/about/team/wendell-moss/.
This episode is a great follow up to the conversation we had with the Castille family last week, so we highly encourage you to listen to that as well by going to https://youtu.be/1M69jfI_J2E.
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone podcast, Tray and Melody welcome a long-awaited guest to the show, Marnie Ferree. Marnie is the founder of Bethesda Workshops, a program that specializes in helping those struggling with sexual brokenness and was the first of its kind to help female sex addicts in what was thought to be a "male only issue." Marnie shares her struggles with infidelity and sexual brokenness, how she has created workshops and resources to help other women, and why it is so important to approach sex addiction as a human issue rather than a purely male or female one.
Her book, No Stones: Women Redeemed from Sexual Addiction, was one of the earliest books on female sex and love addicts and provides crucial information for women looking to escape the cycle of sex addiction.
On this week’s episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Melody sits down with returning guest Leslie Vernick to discuss walking through betrayals, infidelity, and heartbreak in a relationship. Leslie gives our listeners some tips on how to recognize a toxic person or a toxic relationship and what you can do in those situations. She also explains how and when to set appropriate boundaries, when to confront or to forbear, and how to let go of all those negative messages that can be swirling around in our heads.
You can learn more about Leslie’s resources at https://leslievernick.com/ and purchase a copy of her book, The Emotionally Destructive Marriage: How to Find your Voice and Reclaim your Hope, by going to https://amzn.to/306vCLg.
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody chat with returning guest, Dr. Barbara Lowe, to discuss the COVID-19 pandemic from a mental health perspective. Dr. Lowe discusses ways to treat your physical, mental, and spiritual health during quarantine, and, even as life begins to return to normal, what we can do to address lingering issues in our personal lives. She also provides resources that help treat the issues that go deeper than the stress of the pandemic, like https://drbarbaralowe.com/findyourhappy/.
You can learn more about Dr. Lowe and the services she offers at her website: https://drbarbaralowe.com/
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody chat with Elyse Fitzpatrick & Eric Schumacher to discuss their book Worthy: Celebrating the Value of Women, a timely resource that dives into the value, place, and calling of women in the church. But, as they explain in this interview, this isn't a book just for women, but also offers valuable insight for men, especially leaders, who want to grow in their understanding of God's unique design of women. Could we have missed something amid the many abuse scandals that are right now rocking the church? Might the headlines about abuse we’re reading today have their roots in a denigration of the value and worth of women? Elyse and Eric elaborate on all of this and more in this timely conversation.
Book site: https://worthybook.org/
Melody’s Webinar Registration Page: https://event.webinarjam.com/channel/grieving-betrayal
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Russ Morgan & Joey Mure of Wealth Without Wall Street to discuss financial security during COVID-19. Joey and Russ share their expertise to our listeners to help them navigate the financial minefield that is the COVID-19 pandemic. They explain the things every person needs to be doing to keep their head above water in these unprecedented times. They also point to helpful resources and are offering our listeners a chance to join their free community at https://www.wealthwithoutwallstreet.com/community. To learn more about Joey and Russ, visit their website at wealthwithoutwallstreet.com
"Right now there are so many practical things you can be doing to manage your finances, and there are so many great resources out there you can use, especially on our website, to help you navigate that."
"Our mentor had a great saying which was,5% of the people think, 10% of the people think they think, and 85% of people would rather die than think. You have to ask yourself 'what group do I want to be a part of?' These are moments you dive into the Word and think about it, pray on it, because that can be the key to help you free yourself from this prison you feel like you're stuck in."
COVID-19 has shut down the US economy and many are feeling the effects as unemployment applications hit record levels. On this week's show, Tray and Melody talk with Financial Coach Ericka Young to discuss how to handle financial uncertainty during this unprecedented pandemic.
Ericka offers practical guidance to help navigate the current financial landscape as well as ideas on preparing for the future. She also encourages viewers to take the time to step back and ask the question "is my plan working?" and, if it isn't, offers help in creating a plan that will get them through to the other side of this crisis. You can learn more about Ericka and her financial resources on her website: tailormadebudgets.com/.
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Therapist Bryce Landwehr to discuss how to parent a child that has been exposed to pornography. Bryce explains that especially since we all have more free time during the COVID-19 pandemic, its more important than ever to ensure that we have a proper way to talk to our children and parent them through that exposure. Bryce talks about why grace based parenting is key to helping our children navigate a place that often they know more about than we do. Our listeners can learn more about Bryce at http://www.wellspringchristian.com/Bryce_Landwehr.html and they can reach out to Bryce directly at email@example.com
"You are the first image of God your children see so you want to let them know that you love them no matter what. You also want to create a sense of normalcy to you kids that we are all created to be sexual beings, but there is a better way to learn about that then through pornography."
"We need our children to know that sex is an appetite much like hunger and that if you keep feeding that appetite over and over and over, you will become very unhealthy and dependent on that certain type of 'food'."
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray sits down with Army Ranger Jeff Struecker to discuss what it means to be a man. Jeff and Tray discuss how we should mend men who are suffering from brokenness and how to build boys into men. We often try to grow up being a man without ever having someone properly teach us what it means to truly be one. Jeff explains how we can properly realize our masculinity without having to "ruffle a manly pose for our timid hearts." This is an episode you don't want to miss! For more information on Jeff, his speaking engagements, and his books, visit https://jeffstruecker.com/.
"What men need to realize is The opposite side of fear is not courage. The opposite side of fear is faith."
"Courage is the willingness to do the hard right thing when nobody else will. Perhaps some of the most courageous things that a man does are the daily things of doing that right thing when nobody else is watching."
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Gary Thomas to talk specifically to ministry leaders who are overwhelmed in the midst of an unprecedented time with COVID-19. Gary explains how ministry leaders need to identify their strengths in the church and when to recognize that something is outside of "their lane" so that they can allow others to take control of that work. This is an episode everyone can benefit from, but is specifically target to those who are leading churches throughout this difficult time. For more information on Gary Thomas, visit his website: http://www.garythomas.com/.
"I think one of the most important jobs we have as ministers of God is to have a sensitivity to evil. Jesus tells us NOT to be naive."
"As we minister to those in broken relationships, here's how I know an unfaithful spouse has repented. It's when you say to your wife 'I will not go back into that house until I know you will not be controlled anymore."
Get Your Questions Answered!
Tray and Melody's journey has provided unique wisdom and insight in the areas of marriage, parenting, pornography addiction recovery, and betrayal trauma. Each Wednesday at 2 PM CST, you have the opportunity to have any specific questions you might have answered on Q&A with Mel & Tray, a new feature being offered by Undone Redone.
No question is off-limits. Click the link below to register for this FREE event. Submit your question at firstname.lastname@example.org.
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with military spouse and minister Megan Brown. Megan works with the military community, specifically spouses, on how to connect into your community as a military spouse and increase community engagement with active duty members and veterans alike. Military life and the transitions it puts families through can bring challenges including marriage building, creating community, and finding a sense of purpose. Through empowering others to build their military life well, Megan works to help those facing challenges find a purpose and become a part of something bigger than themselves through Christ. Learn more about Megan on her website: www.meganbbrown.com & www.milspoco.com and on Facebook: @MegBrownWrites.
"Even when I was running at a breakneck pace in the other direction, God stayed in fierce pursuit. He is a God who sees, who loves, and who SAVES."
"We have to know how all of scripture fits together. It will not do us any good to snip and splice scripture. We have to know the overall narrative."
"We have a God-given call to push the gospel forward into our families, our neighborhoods, and our cities. It is my greatest hope to see revival swelling on the horizon, a wave of hope crashing into our world."
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Melody sits down with trafficking survivor Christa Lynn. Christa tells Melody how she survived a life filled with neglect, addictions and trafficking, and how she is using that experience to help children, teens and young adults recover from the trauma of human trafficking. Christa Lynn works closely with One More Child, an organization that works to stand beside survivors of trafficking as they overcome vulnerabilities, obstacles and injustices to build dream-worthy lives. Our listeners can learn more about Christa and her work with One More Child at onemorechild.org
"We know that to break these generational cycles, that a community who prays together is going to be able to just walk this dark journey. It’s a war. You’re fighting to battle not just men and women who’ve been trafficked and exploited, but also the bitterness that Satan wants to use to have us continue in destruction."
" I believe God uses prayer not just to transform us who’ve been exploited, but also to transform those who haven’t been exploited, and to help them be able to access the compassion that can only come from God."
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with guests Tod Jacobs and Peter Lynn, authors of Not a Partnership, to discuss why we seem to keep getting marriage wrong and what we can do to make our marriages stronger. Tod and Peter present tools and strategies to not only sustain marriages, but to enrich them as well. They believe that as two people develop the mindset and practice of serving something greater than themselves in their marriages, a miraculous transformation occurs and the marriage is strengthened as a result. Our listeners can learn more about Tod and Peter at their website: https://www.notapartnership.com/.
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody host their first podcast from their new office. They talk about how God will often bring us back to the same crossroads in our lives, but with different results. Tray speaks to our listener's about how to walk these same crossroads without letting the shame narrative take over. He explains that the reason we can begin to find joy in the present is often because we remember where the Lord has taken us. This is a great episode for those feeling like they are walking the same path, but can experience a different outcome through God's grace.
"If we try to bury and forget the painful past, we aren't able to see the beauty of our present in such a drastic contrast."
"When we're in the middle of pain, it's so difficult to see ahead to the future. That's why having hopeful peace can provide such relief. We may not be able to see where God is taking us, but He will take us to a better and brighter future."
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Melody sits down with Kara-Kae James to talk about the challenges and triumphs of motherhood, particularly with postpartum depression. Kara is an author of 6 books and is passionate about seeing women’s lives changed and impacted through the truth of God’s Word. Kara explains that she knows so many moms out there are struggling like her and in desperate need of a reminder that God loves them. She works to help women engage in meaningful conversations about difficult topics and push them to rethink their lives by looking closer at themselves, the Church, and the world. Our listeners can learn more about Kara at http://karakaejames.com/ and can check out her books at https://www.amazon.com/Kara-Kae-James/e/B07N6K35VL%3Fref=dbs_a_mng_rwt_scns_share.
“If we are telling ourselves that we are enough, then where does that leave room for Christ, the One who came to die because we were not enough?”
“My being able to admit I don’t have it all together led to my actually being able to thrive as I allowed Christ to come in and fill all the gaps for me.”
“Motherhood can be a battle, but God has already given us the armor we need. We just need to suit up.”
We all know that betrayal trauma is a pain unique to the men and women that have to face it. However, it is often so easy to focus on the end goal of where we are headed rather than the journey itself. Our guest on today's episode is Tanya McCaw, who sits down with Melody to share her journey through betrayal and reconciliation. She explains how she was married to a sex addict, what that betrayal looked like, and how she used the resources available to walk through the pain and brokenness that seemed to overwhelm her life. This is such an important story to hear, both for those currently experiencing betrayal trauma and those looking to help other women walk through that pain.
"The enemy loves to get in your head when you experience infidelity in a marriage. I kept asking myself 'well what if I were prettier? What if I had nicer legs or what if I kept the house cleaner?' and it works against you to keep you on that performance treadmill."
"When you have a spouse that's addicted to pornography, often you are OVERworking because they are under working. You take on the role of BOTH mom and dad while you are still living with those feelings of 'I have to be better.' And from there you have to recognize that healing is going to be a process. It is going to take take for you to step down from that performance treadmill back to where God is calling you to be."
Our guest on today's show is Dr. Henry Cloud. Dr. Cloud is a New York Times bestselling author, and his books have sold over 10 million copies. He discusses the importance of making safe choices in relationships and setting appropriate boundaries, whether its friendships or romantic relationships. He explains how people can identify the traits that bring nurturing people into our lives, as well as ones we need to learn to avoid. Tray and Melody are so excited to have Dr. Cloud on the Undone Redone Podcast and this is an episode you don't want to miss! Our listeners can learn more about Dr. Cloud's work at www.drcloud.com and www.boundaries.me .
“We change our behavior when the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the pain of changing. Consequences often give us the pain that we need to become motivated enough to change.”
“The extent to which two people in a relationship can bring up and resolve issues is a critical marker of the strength of that relationship.”
“People have to realize there is a big difference between hurt and harm. We all hurt sometimes in facing hard truths, but it makes us grow. It can be the source of huge growth. That is not harmful. Harm is when you damage someone else. Facing reality is usually not a damaging experience, even though it can hurt.”
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Ericka Young to discuss tackling debt and other financial hardships in marriage. Ericka and her husband Chris carried loads of debt that included student loans, car payments, and a mortgage. They eventually found themselves in over $100,000 in debt, but were able to pay everything off successfully after being taught by the master of finance himself, Dave Ramsey. Now over ten years later, she helps both people and businesses transform their finances, careers, families and, most importantly, their futures. She explains the importance of discussing your finances with your spouse, even if it seems difficult to find the time or energy to do so. This is an incredible episode for those looking to talk about financial hardships with their spouses. Our listeners can learn more about Ericka by visiting her website: https://www.tailormadebudgets.com/ or on Twitter https://twitter.com/budgetsbyericka.
"When budgeting its SO important to make sure you include everything in that budget. A lot of people just view their budget as for their bills, when in reality they don't add dining, groceries and other everyday expenses. Make sure you add EVERYTHING to your budget."
"Use cash when you make purchases because that is a finite resource and you can see yourself spending it. It's so easy to swipe a credit card and not think of the balance, but when you use cash, you see just how quickly you can spend it in certain places."
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with author and banker Scott Shay. Shay is a Co-Founder and Chairman of Signature Bank and a longstanding Jewish community activist. He has started a Hebrew school, an adult educational program, and chaired several Jewish educational programs. Shay discusses his new book In Good Faith: Questioning Religion and Atheism, describes what motivated him to engage with the arguments of the New Atheists. He also explains that the temptation of idolatry did not disappear in the Old Testament but persists as part of human nature to this very day, and what we can do to work to counteract that temptation. Our listeners can learn more about Scott and find links to both of his books at https://www.scottshay.com/.
"We have a Jewish saying that states 'don't do unto other's what you wouldn't want done to you' and the rest is just commentary. That is so fundamental to being a believer."
"The problem I try to discuss with idolizing reason is that reason can take you down a road to all of these awful places."
On this week’s episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Dr. Les Parrott to discuss strengthening your marriage. Dr. Parrott is a bestselling author, a professor of psychology at Northwest University, creator of the SYMBIS Assessment, and founder of the Parrott Institute for Healthy Relationships at Olivet Nazarene University. He and his wife Leslie are a husband-and-wife team who not only share the same name, but the same passion for helping others build healthy and stronger relationships. Dr. Parrott explains that a marriage can only be as strong as the two spouses in it and that often times we need to first work on strengthening ourselves before we can tackle issues in our marriages. Our listeners can learn more about Dr. Parrott and his wife’s ministry at https://www.lesandleslie.com/. For those interested in taking the SYMBIS assessment, you can visit https://www.betterlove.com/. Finally those who would like to know more about Dr. Parrott’s book, Love Like That, can visit https://lovelikethatbook.com/.
“You have to realize that your marriage can only be as healthy as the least healthy person in it.”
“Here’s the bottom line: When you open your heart, love changes your mind. Your mind can do an about-face when it receives that divine impulse from the heart. That’s why if you are just looking for a reasonable love, you will miss out on an extraordinary love.”
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Dr. Shannan Crawford to discuss post traumatic growth. Dr. Crawford is a licensed clinical psychologist, conference speaker, adjunct professor, and innovator-expert in Restoring Self-Cohesion. She explains the difficulty of overcoming severe trauma in our lives and the steps we can take to begin that recovery process. She shares her own stories of trauma with Tray and Melody and how God and His word can work to identify and eliminate internal blocks or triggers that hinder us from optimally thriving and fulfilling our life purpose. Our listeners can learn more about Dr. Crawford's practice and speak engagements at www.drshannancrawford.com.
"Just as the body goes to the rescue of an injured limb, the soul aims to rescue the wounded part of the self."
"The dreams you accomplish are less about what you do and more about the substance and character of who you are."
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with award winning singer and songwriter, Charles Billingsley, to reminisce about their time at Samford University and discuss how sometimes the "perfect" image we strive for isn't the right one. Charles discusses his jump into music and how God really tested his strength and walk through his voice. Charles conveys the central message of his heart is to assist other believers in discovering a lifestyle of worship. He explains that every decision we make, every sin we commit is ultimately a worship issue, as a believer. Our listeners can learn more about tour dates, latest releases and Charles' speaking events on his website http://www.charlesbillingsley.com/.
“The greatest joy I have is that moment in a concert when you know people are truly engaging the Spirit of God and the Lord is moving.”
"Everybody worships something or someone, every moment of every day. So, who or what you’re worshiping will determine the choices you make—financially, physically, everything."
"I think the Lord often has to take things away from us in our lives to make us truly appreciate what we have been given. The old adage of you never know what you have until it's gone applies in your walk sometimes as well."
"The most important thing I learned in my walk with God is to remember that He is ALWAYS there for you. Even when it seems like the world has turned against you, Christ has got your back through it all!"
"Rejection and hurt are often a beautiful growth opportunity for Christ disguised as pain."
"It is ok to not be ok. God is always working behind the scenes to heal and promote you, despite places where others seek to hold you back."
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with author and counselor Leslie Vernick. Leslie is the author of seven books, including the best selling, The Emotionally Destructive Relationship and her most recent book, The Emotionally Destructive Marriage. She speaks with Tray and Melody about the difference between a disappointing relationship and a destructive relationship, and what we as spouses can do when we find ourselves in either type. Our listeners can learn more about Leslie and her work by going to her website: https://leslievernick.com/
"When you give another person the power to define you, then you also give them the power to control you."
"In some marriages, trying harder does not engender a reciprocal response. It has the opposite effect. It feeds the fantasy that the sole purpose of your life is to serve your husband, make him happy, and meet his every need."
"Biblically loving your husband doesn’t require you to prop him up in order to enable him to continue to hurt you."
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Rabbi Manis Friedman to discuss intimacy in marriage. Rabbi Friedman states that we all crave intimacy because It's essential to our emotional and spiritual health. Yet, he also explains that today's culture faces an intimacy crisis and often times, even when we're in a committed relationship, we still feel painfully alone. Our listeners can learn more about Rabbi Friedman at his website, https://itsgoodtoknow.org/
"Intimacy flourishes in an atmosphere that is permeated with kindness, respect, and sanctity. True love grows within that atmosphere as well."
"The mistake is that married couples don’t need increased physical pleasure or better physical pleasure. What we need is closeness. Even more than that, we need oneness. We want and need the joy of intimacy."
"Marriage is about creating a life that embraces and nurtures that intimacy. Intimacy is a state of grace that arrives and then hides. So even if we have achieved intimacy, we must continue to maintain it. We must constantly seek it out, cultivate it, protect it, and nurture it."
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Joel Fitzpatrick to discuss spiritual parenting between fathers and their children. Joel Fitzpatrick has served as an ordained minister in the Presbyterian Church in America with a focus on youth and family. He received his MDiv from Westminster Seminary California. Joel lives in Southern California with his wife of nineteen years and their two children. He is a sinner, a preacher, the author of Between us Guys, the coauthor of Mom, Dad . . . What’s Sex?, and contributed chapters to The Sinner and Saints Devotional: 60 days in the Psalms.
Joel explains the balance between laughter and enjoyment and setting boundaries for our children so they can grow up in a Christ centered environment that isn't dependent on what others think. Our listeners can learn more about Joel on his website at https://www.joelfitzpatrick.co/
"On of the most important things I have said to my son is 'Even in the face of your failure, I am proud to be your dad. I love you no matter how well or poorly you do.'"
"When you show your love to your children as Christ loves us, it gives your kids a stable foundation to stand on in all things."
"Being humble in front of your kids is vital. Be quick to forgiveness when your kids mess up. Shaming and disciplining your kids is almost paradoxical to them because they see you sinning while disciplining them for their sins."
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Meteorologist Ashley Gann to discuss work life balance. She explains that it's easy to categorize ourselves based on one area of our lives and define ourselves only by that task or talent. She stresses that we can always find balance in our lives if we live it with intentionality. Ashley Gann is the Chief Meteorologist at CBS 42 in Birmingham, AL and is a believer, wife, and mother of 3. Our listeners can learn more about Ashley on her Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook pages, all of which are under the name @gannweather.
"Living with intentionality is not only vital for your life, but your kids lives as well. They see you living with intentionality and the success that can bring. It has a lasting, positive impact on their lives."
"My mantra for life has become I like to gain people's trust on the sunny days so I can have their trust during the stormy ones."
Have you ever found yourself in a toxic relationship with others? As Christians, we often feel the guilt and responsibility of meeting the needs of unhealthy people in our lives. Whether a family member, spouse, coworker, or friend, toxic people frequently seek to frustrate our empathy in Christ Jesus. While you're seeking God's kingdom first, it seems like they're seeking to distract your focus and delay your work.
Instead of attempting the impossible task of mollifying toxic people, it's time we dedicate our energy to the only worthwhile effort: completing the work God has given us by investing in reliable people. It's only when we learn to say no to bad patterns that we can say yes to the good work God has planned for us.
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, bestselling author of Sacred Marriage, Gary Thomas shares biblical examples of how Christ dealt with toxic people in his new book When to Walk Away, Finding Freedom From Toxic People.
Here are just a few topics Thomas shares with Tray and Melody:
- How to learn the difference between difficult people and toxic people
- How to find refuge in God when you feel under attack
- How we can discern when to walk away from a toxic situation
- How we can keep a tender heart even in unhealthy relationships
We encourage our listeners to learn more about Gary Thomas at his website http://www.garythomas.com/ and can pre-order his new book now on Amazon at https://www.amazon.com/When-Walk-Away-Finding-Freedom-ebook/dp/B07PR87KLL.
"Jesus warns his followers away from spending too much time on a toxic person. He says 'don't throw your pearls to pigs or what is holy to dogs' and He isn't being disrespectful there, but He is recognizing we must know when to walk away."
"We can't let others steal our joy or our mission. It's time to strengthen our defense, learn to set healthy boundaries, and focus on our God-given purpose."
"Just like if you were to remove my spine from my body, even if I had 205 bones left, taking the fall out of scripture puts evil in a position to corrupt good, God-centered people and relationships."
Former Alabama and NFL cornerback Simeon Castille is our guest on this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast. Simeon shares his story of growing up with his All-American father, Jeremiah Castille, and the foundation of faith that his parents created for him. Simeon talks about "breakfast club", which was the summer training program that his father created in order to help he and his brother Tim reach their goals of playing at Alabama and in the NFL. Simeon also courageously shares his own journey from a performance paradigm to a grace paradigm and how he came to understand that Christ's love and forgiveness extends to everyone, including himself.
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody discuss their trip to the Utah Coalition Against Pornography while on location and how a road sign at Valley of Fire National Park got them thinking about marriage. They discuss that like roads we travel, marriage is not always straightforward and easy by design. They tell us the importance of recognizing that marriage will never be perfect or even easy, and that there will always be struggles in a marriage. It's by accepting that truth that couples can begin to work through those problems and find lasting, positive change in their relationship.
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Melody sits down with Author Nancy Hicks to discuss empowering women in God's Grace, even after a trauma in The Church. Nancy's mission is to raise up women around the globe by igniting and equipping them with the power and grace of Christ. They discuss her latest book, Meant to Live, which unpacks how Christians can live in the power and glory of the Gospel―the Good News of Jesus Christ―and celebrate God’s glory in themselves, and the Church. Our listeners can learn more about Nancy at her website https://www.nancyhickslive.com/ and preorder her book on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Meant-Live-Living-Light-Good/dp/1642793280.
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody celebrate their 200th podcast with a very special guest, meteorologist James Spann. Tray and Melody talk about how James inspired them to start podcasting and how they have evolved over time through their podcasts. James discusses his passion for using one's talents to minister to Christ and how anyone can minister to others. He also discusses the importance of weather awareness and how he aims to mitigate loss of life from severe weather in Alabama. Our listeners can follow and contact James Spann on Twitter, https://twitter.com/spann, and on Instagram, https://www.instagram.com/spannwx/?hl=en.
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Melody sits down with Sharon Jaynes to talk about women's struggles in the church and growing up in an abusive environment. For ten years Sharon served as Vice President of Proverbs 31 Ministries and co-host for their daily radio feature. She is the author of 20 books with Harvest House, Moody, Baker, and Multnomah Publishers. She emphasizes that God has the power to transform women's lives for the better. Our listeners can learn more about Sharon at https://sharonjaynes.com/, https://girlfriendsingod.com/sharon-jaynes/, and https://www.proverbs31.org/read/devotions/our-writers/sharon-jaynes. Her books are available at https://www.amazon.com/Sharon-Jaynes/e/B001ILFLGS.
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Jessica Thompson to discuss her seventh book, How to Help Your Anxious Teen: Discovering the Surprising Sources of Their Worries and Fears. She stresses how many of our societal norms can actually exacerbate anxiety in teens and how parents can approach their children to discuss and manage anxiety. Jessica is the author of several books and is a frequent conference speaker. Her heart is to see women, families, and children freed from the bondage of moralism. She is a contributor at Christ Hold Fast. She is also a part of the podcast Front Porch with the Fitzes. Our listeners can learn more about Jessica at her website https://www.jessicathompson.co/ , purchase her latest book on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/How-Help-Your-Anxious-Teen/dp/073697671X/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr= and listen to her podcast on Apple Podcasts https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/front-porch-with-the-fitzes/id1042323124?mt=2.
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody bring Alice Churnock into the studio to discuss the importance of understanding eating disorders. Alice specializes in counseling adolescents, women, and parents in areas relating to eating disorders, body image, and depression, as well as stress and anger management. She stresses that eating disorders go far beyond that of anorexia and bulimia, and that it is pivotal to understand the root issues that lead to these disorders. Most of the time, eating disorders arise as a coping mechanism for problems in life, and Alice explains how to walk with a person through those issues and address the core of each. Our listeners can learn more about Alice at https://www.covenantcounsel.com/counselors/alice-churnock/ and check out her podcast at https://www.rootedministry.com/author/alice-churnock/ .
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Kristen Hatton to discuss what its like walking with a child or teen struggling with an eating disorder. She emphasizes the importance of talking to our children about the idols in their lives that drive undesirable behaviors instead of just trying to fix it for them and make them "good kids." Kristen has written multiple books including The Gospel-Centered Life in Exodus for Students, Face Time: Your Identity in a Selfie World and Get Your Story Straight. Our listeners can learn more about Kristen at her website https://www.kristenhatton.com/.
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down to discuss enmeshment, differentiation and interdependence in marriage. They work to define the difference between each of these terms and different ways that couples can practically address enmeshment in a relationship so that they can work towards a fuller, more healthy marriage. For more information on the tools and tips Melody and Tray discussed in this week's podcast, visit https://undoneredone.com/. Our listeners can also check out the upcoming Open Your Purse and Embark Men's Recovery Intensive events at https://undoneredone.com/openyourpurse and https://undoneredone.com/embark. Follow Tray and Melody on Social Media at https://twitter.com/UndoneRedone , https://www.instagram.com/undoneredone/ , and https://www.facebook.com/UndoneRedone/.
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Author Juli Slattery to discuss sexuality. Juli explains how sexuality is often misinterpreted in the church and that only 10% of Christians enter a marriage without some form of sexual experience from a previous relationship. Juli then discusses what to do for Christians that reach marriage with or without baggage and say "Ok... Now what?" We encourage our listeners to check out her new book "Rethinking Sexuality" and visiting her website https://www.authenticintimacy.com/ for more resources on properly defining God's view of healthy sexuality in marriage.
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray shares his thoughts on submission in marriage and how often men will misinterpret verses like Ephesians 5:22. He explains that God has not called husbands to be tyrants in a relationship that demand their wives to do whatever they say, but instead to lovingly lead them as Christ is leading us in our lives.
Quotes from this episode:
"Many times guys we don't know who we are and we try to feel powerful by controlling our wives. That is not what the Lord has called us to do."
"Submission does not mean that wives do not have a voice. At the end of the day, it is making a decision TOGETHER as a couple."
"Ladies, submission also does not mean living in fear of your husband. That is not the way God intended this and your husband is misinterpreting scripture."
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray sits down with Daniel Fick to discuss pornography addiction and lust. Daniel Fick is the author of One Day at a Time, his story of navigating lust, adultery, pornography, and the healing that only Christ can bring. He tells his journey of addiction and what others can do in similar situations. Our listeners can purchase One Day at a Time on amazon and contact Daniel at Onedayatatimebook@gmail.com.
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Tom and Michelle Weaver to discuss what it's like coming forward when a spouse struggles with sexual infidelity and pornography addiction. Tom and Michelle both emphasize how silence only hurts a relationship and how keeping secrets from your spouse can ultimately destroys the foundations of that relationship. Tray and Melody also spoke at Tom and Michelle's Come to the Table Conference, and our listeners can hear both parts of that discussion at these links https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5yKTzIoBjzA&list=PLYoRkz4XSywMKX5oSaSA-sRcD4CgXhKkl (Part 1) and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JC-up_iGmYg&list=PLYoRkz4XSywMKX5oSaSA-sRcD4CgXhKkl&index=2 (Part 2).
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Rachael Clinton for part two of their discussion on trauma. Rachael defines what spiritual trauma can look like and how trauma can manifest itself in different ways depending on the person. She then explains how we can begin recovering from spiritual trauma and how leaving the church or faith completely isn't the only option. Our listeners can learn more about Rachael Clinton and her ministry at https://theallendercenter.org/about/team/rachael-clinton/.
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Rachael Clinton for a two-part discussion on spiritual trauma. Rachael is a trauma specialist, pastor, preacher and therapeutic practitioner who serves as the Director of Organizational Development for The Allender Center at The Seattle School. In the podcast, she explains why going into places of pain and trauma is an important part of the healing process. While we often times believe we can just ignore or think our way into healing, Rachael explains that true healing comes from utilizing resources and finding the right groups that can help us through our pain.
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Dr. Laurel Shaler. They discuss Dr. Shaler's latest book, Relational Reset: Unlearning the Habits That Hold You Back, which outlines unhealthy patterns that may be holding us back, gives us practical steps for improving our relationships, and helps us to find our ultimate security and identity in Jesus Christ.
Episode 187 features Tray and Mel discussing the importance of rest and play as they record after a week of writing at beautiful Smith Lake in North Alabama. They discuss the underlying unbelief that keeps us perpetually “doing” instead of taking time to simply “be”. But, as they share in this episode, rest and play are vitally important in keeping us energized and enjoying wholehearted living. Where do you need to cut back in order to build in the margins necessary for adequate play and rest?
Please share this episode with family and friends who also need to be reminded of the importance of play. Connect with us on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter and keep up with all that is going on at Undone Redone.
On this week’s episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Dr. Marcus Warner and Rev. Chris Coursey to discuss revitalizing joy in a marriage. Marcus Warner is a former pastor and college professor who has written several books on topics ranging from how to study the Bible to spiritual warfare, emotional healing, and leadership. Chris Coursey travels the world equipping couples, ministry leaders, and churches in relational brain skills. They discuss 4 key habits to kindling joy in a relationship on a daily basis and explain how we can rewire our brains to find joy in a multitude of situations. For more information on their ministries, visit https://deeper-walk-international.myshopify.com/ , https://happyhappymarriage.org/ , and check out their latest book, The 4 Habits of Joy-Filled Marriages.
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Ruth Buezis to discuss awakening one's sex life and what God truly wants sex to be for married couples. She explains that God wants our marriage bed to restore us, refresh us, comfort us, make us one, and to be a picture of the intimacy that He wants with us. Ruth is the author of multiple books including Awaken Love: The Truth About Sex That Will Transform Your Marriage and leads conversations on her website, https://www.awaken-love.net/ .
Tray and Melody welcome Chad Bird back to the show on this week’s episode. Chad is an author and speaker devoted to honest Christianity that addresses the raw realities of life. On today’s show, Tray, Mel, and Chad discuss his latest book, Upside-Down Spirituality: The 9 Essential Failures of a Faithful Life which takes a deep-dive into the counter-cultural life God desires for each of us. Chad invites us to put our striving for success aside in order to embrace nine specific failures in the areas of our personal lives, our relationships, and the church.
Chad has a number of resources that you can access by visiting http://www.chadbird.com, https://1517.org/, and https://www.christholdfast.org/.
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Noah Filipiak to discuss his new book Beyond the Battle: A man’s guide to his identity in Christ in an over-sexualized world. Noah discusses the base of his addiction to pornography during the rise of the internet and how it affected his marriage. He then discusses his inspiration for the book and how he worked to find the root of his desires and treated them in a Christ based perspective. Noah leads a small group of online discussions of his book and encourages guys to check it out at https://www.beyondthebattle.net/ .
On this week's episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down to discuss the importance of full disclosure to a loved one after experiencing infidelity in a marriage. They speak on the difficulty of coming forward to disclose information to a spouse and how vital it is to begin that journey of healing and rebuilding in a relationship. Tray also speaks about two non-profits that he and Melody have worked closely with: Magic City Woodworks and Sozo Children. You can check out Magic City Woodworks at http://www.magiccitywoodworks.org/ and Sozo Children at http://www.sozochildren.org/ . Both are phenomenal organizations that work to give back to communities both locally and internationally.
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Travis Shepard. Travis is a Major in the U.S. Air Force Reserved. Travis speaks about his story that lead to divorce while being active in the United States military. He speaks to Tray and Melody about his reunion with Christ and how he is working to father his daughters through the divorce.
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray sits down with author Christopher Yuan. Dr. Christopher Yuan has taught the Bible at Moody Bible Institute for over ten years and his speaking ministry on faith and sexuality has reached five continents. He speaks with Tray about his experiences as a gay man returning to Christ, and how the church can begin to have a better understanding of sexuality in light of God's grand story of creation, fall, redemption, and consummation.
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with speaker and author Justin Holcomb to discuss talking to your children about sex in a healthy discussion. Justin is the author of multiple books including God Made All of Me, Ride of My Disgrace, and On the Grace of God. Justin explains that it's never too late to sit down with your child and talk about sex as a glorious gift from God.
Justin is an Episcopal priest and a theology professor at Reformed Theological Seminary and Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary. He wrote Know the Creeds and Councils, Know the Heretics, and On the Grace of God. Justin also co-authored with his wife, Lindsey, God Made All of Me, Is It My Fault? and Rid of My Disgrace: Hope and Healing for Victims of Sexual Assault. You can find him on Facebook, Twitter, and at JustinHolcomb.com.
On this week's episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Dr. Preston Sprinkle. Sprinkle is the author of many books including "People To Be Loved", "Living In a Gray World", and "Grace//Truth 2.0". They discuss exploitative relationships, the LGBT community, and how to have an honest dialogue of Grace and Truth with those struggling with same sex attraction.
On this week’s episode of the Undone Redone Podcast, Tray discusses upcoming events before diving into the idea of healing on the other side of pain. Tray talks about how pain is an important part of the healing process as God works to bring deep-rooted issues to the surface of our lives, and we can begin to work through them with His power and glory.
On this week’s episode of The Undone Redone Podcast, Tray and Melody sit down with Author Gary Thomas. Gary has published over 19 books including Sacred Marriage, 9 Must-Have Conversations for a Doubt-Free Wedding Day, and Authentic Faith.
On this week’s episode, Tray and Melody sit down with Andrew Bauman, a licensed mental health counselor from The Seattle School of Psychology and Theology, to have an in-depth discussion about his struggles with pornography and the unexpected death of his son, Brave.
Andrew explains that pornography began to parent him in areas where his parents were voiceless. His father, although a pastor, struggled with addiction for 25 years and ultimately undid their family. “That arousal and excitement in porn in a way began to give me new life, but that only lasted until it began to kill me. From there I began to learn what it means to incorporate my sin and my shame into my life in a redemptive way. There was a therapist while I was flunking out of college who really began to take an interest in my life, he saw me in a way that a figure in my life hadn’t been before. Hope began to grow in me.”
After losing their son Brave, Andrew stated that it is ok to rage at a God, to curse at him and yet desperately pray to Him for healing and grace. “The only way we knew to act on this was to be very LOUD with our grief. It felt like going through life without skin, everyone’s comments, even well intentioned, just hurt to the bone.”
How do I get well? Andrew says you have to bleed and you have to die in a sense. You have to fillet yourself, bear your heart before others and THEN receive the first aid of God’s grace and healing. Most people want to grow, but the price of growth is pain.
Grace and Resolutions: How do we balance our desire to be disciplined, check off certain boxes and be good stewards of God while also beginning to seeing grace not as just a form of salvation, but as a form of sanctification in your walk?
On this week’s episode, Tray and Melody talk openly and honestly about how painful the holidays can be for those who are dealing with marital issues stemming from sexual brokenness. During the holiday season, everywhere we look we see smiling, happy families…out shopping, on the Hallmark channel, commercials that are non-stop. When we are experiencing a season of brokenness that overlaps with the holidays, things can really be magnified and our enemy…the accuser of the brethren…often loves to point out the discrepancy in our circumstances and what we see around us.
Having experienced 6 years of divorce, Tray and Melody know firsthand how hard the holidays can be and address some practical ways we can successfully navigate the Christmas season. For all of the show notes for this episode, go to http://www.undoneredone.com/ur172.
On this week’s Undone Redone podcast episode, Tray and Melody are joined by April McKinney of the 20,000 words podcast. April is a wife, mom, chef, podcaster, and believer. April bravely and body shares her story of overcoming an eating disorder in her younger years and how that impacted her faith journey and life.
April shares her undone redone story in a transparent and vulnerable way which will impact and inspire everyone who listens. To learn more about April visit her website, www.aprilmckinney.com.
On this week’s Undone Redone podcast, Tray and Melody welcome Dina Alexander back to the show! Dina is the Executive Director of Educate and Empower Kids, a Texas-based non-profit that provides resources to parents and educators to encourage deep connection with their kids through media education, meaningful family communication and intentional parenting.
In this interview, Dina shares wisdom and insight for parents on media literacy, body image, positive self-talk, living in an image-based culture, and becoming a trusted resource for your children on the topic of sex and sexuality.
If you haven’t already heard her earlier interview on Undone Redone, “How To Talk To Your Kids About Pornography”, go to episode #84 and check it out!
Here are links to all of Educate and Empower Kids’ new books written for children:
Noah’s New Phone: A Story About Using Technology for Good https://amzn.to/2RdWnGg
Petra’s Power to See: A Media Literacy Adventure https://amzn.to/2RdY3iJ
Messages About Me: Wade’s Story: A Boy’s Quest for Healthy Body Image
Messages About Me: Sydney’s Story: A Girl’s Journey to Healthy Body Image
Happy Thanksgiving! After a 2 month hiatus from the show, Tray and Melody are back with episode 169 of the Undone Redone podcast where they discuss their trip to Uganda with SOZO Children, celebrating the 10th anniversary of their remarriage in the Bahamas, the Open Your Purse gala, becoming empty nesters, recent speaking trips to Maryland and Georgia, and of course, thoughts on Thanksgiving.
If you enjoyed this episode, please consider giving us a rating and review on iTunes and/or Stitcher Radio! God bless!
Tray and Melody are back for part two of their two part series on healthy conflict in marriage. They dig more into what having conflict in a marriage can look like when it is healthy and how to handle conflict with grace.
Tray and Melody discuss how loses yourself in your coupleship can often times lead to more issues and more conflict because if you are properly inmeshed your spouse should understand. The problem with that is that when you think that your spouse is thinking the same thing which leads to stagnant frustration.
Tray and Melody also talk about the need to be assertive and how not being assertive can cause more conflict than being assertive and stepping up. This can lead to resentment on one side because it causes one spouse to step up and fill the void that the other will not assertive themselves into.
Having a desire for your husband to be assertive does not mean sitting, waiting and hoping your spouse can be a mind reader. Melody and Tray talk about what assertive and active listening actually mean and how they can impact your marriage in a positive way.
Tray and Melody kick off a two part series discussing healthy conflict in marriage and how to deal with conflict in a Godly relationship.
When you put two broken people together you will have conflict regardless of what you do. You ultimately cannot avoid conflict, but rather you need to learn how to work through conflict in a healthy manner. Avoiding conflict leads to more conflict because at some point everything that is constantly pushed down comes bursting to the surface.
Tray and Mel discuss what they have learned about having healthy relationships and how to handle conflict the right way.
Melody reflects on how creating a false narrative in your mind about what you think is happening only adds to the problem and how opening up the lines of communication can flip that narrative. By flipping the narrative and opening up what the truth is you can diffuse the situation or bring what might be the truth to the surface.
Tray and Melody are talking My Secure Family and the event benefitting MSF called Open Your Purse happening September 21st. Listen to hear more about what Tray and Mel are doing to prepare and equip parents with the tools and knowledge to protect their children in the world of technology.
There will be a ladies only event at the Grand Bohemian Hotel in Mountain Brook, Alabama. This is a wonderful opportunity to gather with a community of women at a dinner benefitting a incredible initiative.
The Open Your Purse Benefit is unlike any event Birmingham has seen and gives you an opportunity to wear your giving on your arm while positively impacting families in our community.
Proceeds from the Open Your Purse Benefit will go to support My Secure Family, an initiative that seeks to help equip parents and grandparents in protecting their children from online dangers and other inappropriate content and to encourage and empower individual responsibility in the age of technology.
One exceptional woman will be presented the Power of the Purse Award, given to the woman who brings the most women to this inaugural event to encourage philanthropic support and awareness within the community.
Limited number of tables and tickets are available, so make your reservation soon.
Doors Open at 5:30 p.m. Visit www.mysecurefamily.com to learn more and get your tickets!
My Secure Family will provide a community for parents and grandparents that will equip them to effectively shepherd the hearts of their children and to innoculate them from the harmful impact of pornography and other sexually explicit content. My Secure Family will inform parents on the constantly changing digital landscape and help them navigate current issues like cyberbullying, gaming, social media, and online digital safety.
For any questions concerning the event email melody at Melody@undoneredone.com
Melody is joined by Catherine Etherington all the way from Northern England to discuss betrayal trauma, her unique insight into addiction of all types, recovery and the beauty of grace. Catherine and Melody talk their own journey through betrayal and finding healing through various resources and community.
Catherine and Melody discuss how finding community, support and finding someone to process the pain with are the best first steps for women to take after facing betrayal. Self care is an extremely important part of the healing process due to the amount of emotional energy women are putting out. Catherine walks us through the process she walks women through to find true healing and comfort after betrayal.
Catherine is a 10 year recovering addict who found Christ through her recovery. Catherine met her husband a few years into her recovery journey and coming out of a relationship with a man who was struggling with sex addiction. After several years Catherine discovered pornography on her husband’s phone. After doing loads of research, and finding support and resources for him Catherine hit a brick wall in finding support for herself. This caused Catherine to become a life and recovery coach.
Full Circle Coaching was created to offer support and guidance for women as they consider what the future holds for themselves as well as their relationship. It is aimed at providing support for them to rebuild their personal wholeness and strength. Catherine has trained as a Certified Professional Life Coach and has added specialist training for partners of men with sexual issues with both the American Association of Sex Addiction Specialists (AASAT) and The Association of Partners of Se Addicts Trauma Specialists (APSATS), making me the only coach with this training in the UK.
Catherine is able to provide a unique insight into addiction and has worked with many other addicts to achieve sobriety through the 12 step model and other modalities.
Catherine is a published blogger, aiming to raise awareness of the issue of sex addiction and the impact on the partner, writing for the Huffington Post as well as other publications. She is a 35 year old mother to two daughters both entering their teens. This issue will affect all women in some way and Catherine’s goal is to work hard to equip her daughters for healthy relationships when the time comes.
Melody is joined by Lynn Cherry to take betrayal, healing and the beautiful grace found in the gospel. Melody and Lynn share their personal journeys walking through betrayal trauma and how they got through the most difficult times in their lives.
Lynn walks us through her own undone redone story including getting married, starting a family and discovering betrayal from her husband through pornography addiction. Lynn and Melody discuss her book. And how it is used as a healing tool for women facing betrayal.
Lynn was born and raised in North Dakota. She discovered a love of writing in the sixth grade and was a bit of a science nerd. She went to college, got a degree in biology, and met her husband, David. They got married in 1991 and moved to Texas. She worked in molecular genetics for six years and when she became a mom, she was able to stay home with their two boys.
During the most difficulty season in life Lynn rediscovered her love of writing. After discovering her husband’s virtual infidelity of pornography addiction Lynn pretended and coped for many years, but because of the grace and joy found in the Gospel Jesus met her in the pain. He gave her the courage and strength to face it. Writing helped her reconcile her reality. After going through group therapy, Lynn learned that the way she expressed her recovery journey resonated with other women. She released my book, Keep Walking, 40 Days to Hope and Freedom after Betrayal in 2016.
Thanks to Jesus and therapy, Lynn and her husband made it through the addiction and trauma together. They both knew they wanted to share their story and wanted people to know there is hope.
Tray is joined by singer/songwriter, actor, speaker, and advocate against sexual exploitation in all its forms, Jeromy Darling of The Spokeman. Tray and Jeromy dive into a conversation surrounding his passions, abstinence, music, movies and the beauty of faith based relationships.
Jeromy has his hand in a vast array of projects ranging from speaking engagements, music, films, writings and even tied martial arts. He walks us through these projects, why he is passionate about each of them and how you can get involved.
Jeromy has been married to his one and only girlfriend Gretchen since September 1, 2002. The couple live in Minneapolis with their three sons; Wyatt, Wilder, and Wren.
Jeromy started The Salvage Project in 2008 when he felt called to bring his songs, heart and missions to those behind bars. Although he faced many hurdles he found his way to playing small concerts for disabled vets. Since then he has been able to add bringing concerts to women’s prisons ever since. To learn more about all the good work The Salvage Project is doing visit their website. http://www.thesalvageproject.org/
Jeromy is a speaker for The Abstinence Resource Center and visits schools and other venues to speak to young people on the importance of abstinence. To learn more about the Abstinence Resource Center and find out how to bring them to your school or venue visit their website. http://www.arc.rocks/
To learn more about Jeromy’s music and his three act broadway style play called The Spokesman and how you can book it near you visit here. http://thespokesman.live/
You can find the film Love&Sexx&Porn on youtube here. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x15FblpH6mU
To find out where to buy Jeromy’s companion book that follows along to the film Love&Sex&Porn click here. http://thespokesman.live/books
To connect with Jeromy, learn more about the projects he is involved in or follow his life visit his website. http://www.jeromydarling.com/
Tray is joined by Lee Strobel to talk his story of going from atheist to Believer, his books, and the transformative power of Christ, the Gospel and Grace. Lee walks us through the thought process he went through in his journey of discovery of Christ and understanding his love and grace.
Lee gives us some insight on his conversion and sanctification process which lasts a lifetime. He also gives hope to those who are struggling with shame of dealing with wrongdoings and it not being instant.
Lee’s book The Case for Christ was turned into a movie and he walks us through seeing his own story out there for the whole world to see. Seeing all his wrongdoings and life before Christ put on display for anyone to see is all worth it when people are coming to faith.
Atheist- turned- Christian Lee Strobel is the former award- winning legal editor of the Chicago Tribune and best-selling author of more than twenty books. HIs classic, The Case for Christ, is a perennial favorite which details his conversion to Christianity. His recent release, The Case for Grace, just won the 2016 Nonfiction Book of the Year from the EPCA. For the last twenty-five years, his life’s work has been to share the evidence that supports the truth and claims of Christianity and to equip believers to share their faith with the people they know and love.
Lee earned his Bachelor of Journalism from the University of Missouri and his Master of Studies in Law at Yale Law School. He was a journalist for fourteen years at The Chicago Tribune and other newspapers, winning Illinois' highest honor for public service journalism from United Press International. He also led a team that won UPI's top award for investigative reporting in Illinois.
Lee has been a featured guest on national networks including ABC, Fox, Discovery, PBS, and CNN. He was the host of Faith Under Fire, a provocative program that brought together some of the brightest Christians and skeptics to debate issues central to the Christian faith. He also appeared in the feature film, God's Not Dead 2, as an expert witness for the defense. In 2017 Pure Flix Entertainment will release a major motion picture depicting Lee's journey from atheism to faith. You can learn more about the film, watch the trailer, and subscribe for updates at thecaseforchristmovie.com.
As part of his speaking ministry, Lee travels across the country (and sometimes the world) sharing his testimony, encouraging believers, and challenging skeptics. He regularly speaks at conferences, commencements, fundraisers, and other major events.
Lee is currently a teaching pastor at Woodlands Church in Texas where he speaks multiple times each year. He recently joined the faculty at Houston Baptist University as a Professor of Christian Thought.
Tray and Melody are joined by Mo Isom to talk her books, Jesus, tough conversations, and her own undone redone story. Mo, Mel and Tray discuss parenting kids to have a healthy view on sex and purity.
Mo talks through her undoing story of identity issues, eating disorder struggles, loss, grief and brokenness. She tells us of how she reached her rock bottom and from that moment forward God has totally changed her life and what she had planned. She lets us in on how she went through season of isolation and she went through a season of fasting to totally dive into what the Lord was telling her to do. That meant stepping away from families and settings that she was comfortable with, but how this allowed her to step into true friendship, true community and the true calling God had her life.
Mo has written two books Wreck My Life: Journeying from Broken to Bold and Sex, Jesus, and the Conversations the Church Forgot. Her books have reached thousands of people worldwide and her messages of hope, transformation and timely, Holy Spirit-lead revelation have been featured on, at and in Convocation at Liberty University, The Grove at Passion City Church, The Gospel Coalition, MGM’s light workers.com, Life Today, The Happy Hour with Jamie Ivey, YouthWorker Magazine, and countless other platforms.
Mo discusses a poem she wrote around the time 50 shades of grey came out in which God made her bold to share the truth that was on her heart. You can find that poem here. http://moisom.com/50-shades-of-grace/
Mo is a New York Times bestselling author, a nationally sought-after speaker and a zealous voice rising up for her generation. She was an All-American goalkeeper for the LSU Women’s Soccer team and the first female to train with and try out for an SEC men’s football team. Her life was riddled with great personal tragedy including battling an eating disorder, overcoming the suicide of her father, struggling with promiscuity, and surviving a horrific car accident. Through the grace of God she encountered the love and mercy of Jesus. Mo is now married to her husband Jeremiah and they have two daughters. They call Atlanta, Georgia home.
Tray is joined by Dave McIntyre who won season two of The History Chanels hit reality show ALONE. Dave talks his wilderness survival skills, relying on God during trying times, and a little bit about his own undone redone journey.
Dave takes through his journey of finding a love for Christ and the wilderness and how he was able to open a wilderness survival ministry in Brazil. He was able to live both his passions together until he came face to face with his own undoing, which for Dave was a divorce. This divorce caused him to lose his ministry and he found himself back in Michigan. He was approached by the producers to submit a casting for the show ALONE.
After being offered a position on the show he accepted a place and that began his journey. He spent 66 days on the north end of Vancouver Island living off the land in isolation. Listen to hear more about his journey.
Melody is joined by Kristen Jensen from Protect Young Minds for episode 159 to talk her ministry, her books and faith based parenting.
Kristen is the founder of Protect Young Minds and best-selling author of Good Pictures Bad Pictures: Porn-Proofing Today’s Young Kids and Good Pictures Bad Pictures Jr.: A Simple Plan to Protect Young Minds. She serves on the Prevention Task Force of the National Coalition on Sexual Exploitation. She received her bachelor’s degree in English Literature and her master’s degree in Organizational Communication. Kristen grew up in both Wyoming and Massachusetts, is the mother of three awesome children, and currently lives with her husband in beautiful Washington State.
Protect Young Minds seeks to help parents “porn-proof” their kids before they come across highly addictive and easily accessible internet pornography. Additionally, PYM offers guidance for families whose children have already been hurt by pornography, and hopes to serve as a “force multiplier” by empowering proactive people who want to educate their local communities.
Tray is joined by seminary professor Dr. Chuck DeGroat to discuss masculine initiation, his books, his personal journey, and the shame that impacts everyone.
Chuck gives us an insight on a significant moment of experiencing shame and how he took that specific moment to start a journey of looking at his sexual and emotional story.
Tray and Chuck discuss the crisis of masculinity that faces our culture and society today. Chuck offers his opinion on how we need to address this issue and what Christian Men can do to help grow men up at an earlier age.
Chuck is a professor of Counseling and Christian Spirituality at Western Theological Seminary in Holland, MI. He is also co-founder and Senior Fellow at Newbigin House of Studies in San Francisco. He has spent the last 20+ years in a fluid combination of pastoral ministry, seminary teaching, and clinical counseling. His writings are mostly about the intersections of psychology, theology, and Christian spirituality with a focus on our lived experience of oneness and worthiness in Jesus.
Prior to going to Western Theological Seminary, Chuck was a teaching pastor at City Church San Francisco, where he co-founded Newbigin House of Studies, an urban and missional training center. He has also started two church counseling centers, a Lay Counseling Program and a Fellows program. All of this represents his commitment to formation for mission.
His first book is Leaving Egypt: Finding God in the Wilderness Places, which represents his narrative biblical paradigm for understanding counseling, care and formation. His second book, The Toughest People to Love focuses on caring for the most difficult people leaders encounter. His third book Wholeheartedness brings a version of wholeness admit our perfectionism and shame-based culture. Chuck also has a self-published Lenten Devotional called Falling Into Goodness.
Tray is joined by Brett Hendrix of Changing Lanes Ministries to discuss his story of grace, what his ministry is doing and his passion for change that happens in authentic community.
Brett takes us through his journey of addiction and the impact that had on his childhood, marriage and continues to have on him today. After being exposed to the playboy channel at the age of 8, Brett suddenly found his identity engulfed by pornography for the rest of his years growing up. Fast forward through 22 years of addiction Brett was faced with a trio of events that ultimately led to him confessing to his wife and men’s small group. With this confession came the removal of the burden of secrecy. In 2007, Brett starting meeting one on one with men to help them find victory over sexual addiction and then he launched Changing Lanes Ministries in 2010.
Changing Lanes is a ministry devoted to leading individuals and families from the devastating effect of sexual addiction. Our mission is to provide Biblically based support and restoration for people struggling with sexual sins.
Tray is joined by Jake Kissack and Ben Bennett from Josh McDowell ministries to talk their own struggles with pornography, the shame that comes with that and how they are using their stories to make a difference now. They discuss their work with Josh McDowell ministries and how you can get involved.
Ben grew up in Virginia Beach, Virginia and met Christ at an early age. After being heavily involved in the campus ministry of Cru throughout college, and developing a great desire to see college students transformed by the gospel, he joined their staff in 2011. For over 10 years of his life, Ben battled a porn addiction and other forms of habitual sexual sin before coming to lasting freedom through a Biblical and clinical approach to sexual addiction recovery.
Until recently, Ben worked with the campus ministry of Cru serving as the Mid-Atlantic Regional Coordinator for Cru’s sexual addiction recovery groups. He currently resides in Dallas, Texas and serves with Josh McDowell Ministry as an author, speaker, and evangelist supporting the health and restoration of men and women struggling with woundedness, habitual sin, and sexual brokenness. He enjoys traveling, music, and the finest of fast food cuisines, Taco Bell.
Jake was raised where the buffalo still do roam, on his family’s 3000 acre angus cattle ranch in Wyoming. His adventurous heart was pursued and captivated by Jesus as far back as memory serves. His passion to see Jesus bring life to all was bolstered in his master’s degree thesis work on how pornography negatively affects the church. His 13 year journey with a porn addiction crushed his passion and compelled him to seek true freedom, which was found through Christian sexual addiction recovery. Jake resides in Dallas, Texas and serves as a developing author, speaker and evangelist, supporting the health and restoration of men and women struggling with woundedness, habitual sin, and sexual brokenness.
Visit www.imlivingfree.com to learn more about what they are doing and to find useful resources use in your own journey.
Tray is joined by Clay Olsen for episode 155 to discuss Fight the New Drug, Fortify, and why fighting the addiction of pornography is so important.
Clay is a passion fueled idea machine with a clear vision to impact the world. In college, he founded Fight The New Drug with a few like-minded friends. Since then, it has grown into a worldwide movement. Over the years, Clay has presented to more than 100,000 people on the harmful effects of pornography and other forms of sexual exploitation. With an exceptional talent in ugly dance moves and a flair for competitive yard gaming, Clay helps lead the Fight the New Drug team in reaching youth and creating resources to equip and educate in this movement for love. Clay sits on the Board of Directors for a number of different non-profit and start-up organizations and finds a lot of fulfillment in advising entrepreneurs in their efforts to make a dent in the world.
Fight the New Drug is a non-religious and non-legislative organization that exists to provide individuals the opportunity to make an informed decision regarding pornography by raising awareness on its harmful effects using only science, facts, and personal accounts. For more information visit FightTheNewDrug.org
Fortify is the most recent tool to become available for men and women. Fortify is an online support community for men and women – young and old – seeking lasting freedom from pornography. In addition to a series of instructional videos and accompanying training, Fortify offers many opportunities for individuals to share insights and stories together.
Tray and Melody are joined by siblings Jessica Thompson and Joel Fitzpatrick to discuss talking to your kids about sex and their new book, Mom, Dad… What’s Sex?
Jessica and Joel discuss what prompted the brother/sister duo to write a book on sex and what gives them a unique perspective on the topic. They wanted to put out a resource that they could use in their own parenting as well as provide parents with a source of guidance with a gospel approach.
By diving into various aspects of our kids lives such as social media and outside pressures Joel and Jessica provide parents with a groundwork of what it means to parent with grace. They offer a way to give your kids a Gospel- Centered view of sex and our culture.
Tray is joined again by Therapist Jay Stringer to discuss how we can go into our pain and that can be a roadmap to our healing. Jay talks about his work with men and women in diving deep into the root of where issues might come from. Jay discusses how diving into this pain often puts you on the path towards direct healing.His first book Unwanted: How Sexual Brokenness Reveals Our Way to Healing, will be released in the fall of 2018. You can read the first chapter and pre-order your copy of the book here. http://www.jay-stringer.com/book/
Jay has spent the last decade working on the frontlines of the demand for pornography and sexual exploitation. He holds an MDiv and master in counseling psychology from the Seattle School of Theology and Psychology and received post-graduate training under Dr. Patrick Carnes and Dr. Dan Allender. As a writer, speaker, and therapist, Jay’s work guides men and women through the shameful portions of their story and into a journey of meaning and healing.
Tray and Melody are joined by Jessica Harris who is the founder of Beggar’s Daughter and an author. Jessica tells her story of struggling with pornography and ultimately her addiction to it. She brings us into her journey into the shame she felt and her forgiveness through grace and the gospel.
She reflects back on her journey and healing process and how she is still healing through grace from this. Her passion now is to create a community for women to be open and hopeful that this isn’t a issue to face alone.
Jessica Harris is the founder of Beggar’s Daughter, a ministry dedicated to walking with women who have an addiction to pornography. Telling her own story of porn addiction and struggle with lust, Jessica seeks to help other women find hope, healing, and grace. Jessica shares resources and insights from her own journey on the Beggar’s Daughter blog and occasionally travels and speaks on the topic of female lust addiction and how churches can minister to women who struggle. She resides just outside of Washington DC where she works as a teacher and serves on the Biblical counseling team in her church. She is the author of Love Done Right: Devos - A Journey From Lust into the Love of God and Beggar’s Daughter.
Tray and Melody are joined by Sam Black from covenant eyes to discuss the need for filtering and accountability online, authentic community, intentionality and living a life of freedom.
Tray, Melody and Sam discuss the importance of having not only accountability partners in life but the benefits of utilizing tools that Covenant Eyes provides. These tools not only allow you to put filters in place for your children but also allow their internet history to be sent to you in a report weekly. This is a wonderful parenting tool that allows conversations to be opened up and an understanding of personal accountability to begin to be formed.
In addition, they discuss the importance of this tool for adults to use with their spouses and accountability partners in life. This is a freeing step for so many struggling with addiction and keeps you honest with yourself and others about issues you face.
Sam Black is a vice president at Covenant Eyes Internet Accountability, and the author of "The Porn Circuit: Understand Your Brain and Break Porn Habits in 90 Days." He joined the Covenant Eyes team in 2007 after 18 years as a journalist, and has edited 16 books on the impact of pornography and how to protect our families. He has been married for 22 years and is a father of two.
Tray and Melody are joined for the 150th episode of the Undone Redone Podcast by author, speaker, pastor, and entrepreneur Stephen Mizell. Tray, Mel and Stephen talk the messy stories, his own undoing and coming back from the mess through grace.
Growing up a Pastor’s kid, Stephen’s father urged him to try other things before settling on ministry and Stephen did just that. After trying a slew of jobs and businesses Stephen felt God stirring in his heart in 1995 to go into ministry. He took a church in rural North Carolina where they were for several years.
Around that time he and his wife had gone through several marital issues, but he thought he had dealt with his side of the issues. The big undoing started with the hiring of a new employee at the Church. Conversations lead to an affair with someone else and ended up having to resign from the Church. He and his wife eventually divorced.
They discuss the comparison that is inevitable in our culture where we compare our lives to those of the people around us instead of looking at a perfect Savior. Its in the places of Gospel community where we can surround the conversations of vulnerability and weakness that real healing occurs.
Stephen has been the lead pastor at Open Door Church in Edenton, North Carolina since 2010 and is working in northeastern North Carolina to build life-giving congregations in rural communities. Stephen, a gifted communicator known for making practical truths acceptable to people of all backgrounds, is also part of the John Maxwell team, and has been asked to share leadership principles to churches, business, and organizations of all sizes all around the world.
In addition to sharing biblical and leadership principles in both the United States and abroad, Stephen has written several books including The Long Walk Back.The book chronicles the long, difficult, and arduous journey back from the brink, giving people hope, inspiration, and wisdom. As the subtitle to his book says, there is always a path to recover from failure.
Traylor is joined by artist and craftsman David DelaGardelle of Cedarlore Forge to discuss the journey to becoming a full time craftsman, God fulfilling dreams, marriage, and sword making.
David takes us through the journey of starting sword making as a hobby in high school to now doing this full time. He reflects back on how God provided him with everything he wanted and dreamed and that made him realize these physical and earthly things do not fulfill you.
He walks us through the struggle of seeking perfection and success in your chosen work. David and Tray discuss the heart of men and how deep rooted you seek validation.
David is 29 years old and is married to his wife Hannah. David and Hannah live in Indiana with their 8 month old son, Boaz. Cedarlore Forge is the sole work of artist and craftsman David DelaGardelle. David crafts mythopoetically and historically inspired one-of-a-kind fully functional swords and fine art.
Cedarlore Forge is David's serious artistic exploration of the Northern European mythopoetic tradition, in the form of uniquely hand forged swords and artwork. He attempts to embody the ideology that Professor J.R.R. Tolkien spoke of in his poem "Mythopoeia" when he wrote of the creation of art as a transcendent truth that can glorify and praise our own Creator.
David crafts each piece with meaning and purpose, a mythic story to tell, and a truth to be known. He works with the raw materials as closely as they would have been used thousands of years ago by historical swordsmiths. Also, he is inspired by both the classical and legendary works of old writers and folktales. The natural environments of his childhood shaped his imagination into the craftsman he is today.
Traylor and Melody are joined by Bethany Meadows to talk parenting, faith, adoption, and the great news of the gospel.
Bethany worked in youth ministry as a mother of one daughter and fell in love with teenagers. She called herself a mother to one with the heart of a big family. She ended up reading an article about an organization which ultimately led her to feeling called to adopt. Bethany and her husband ended up adopting 4 siblings despite being overwhelmed and lining up every excuse she could find.
With the addition of four children, Bethany was forced to revaluate her parenting style and discipline techniques all while teaching about God’s love and grace.
Getting a Grip is structured to take the reader through the process of developing their own parenting plan. It is a framework upon which a parent can establish and build customized methods for discipline, setting rules and guidelines and even identifying spiritual objectives. Throughout the book, Bethany uses stories and examples from her own parenting journey to illustrate and support each section. In just 10 simple chapters, she guides the reader step-by-step to discover a new way of parenting—a way that is flexible enough to change as needs change.
As a former teen runaway, Bethany did not have an easy or typical start. However, those early experiences as a rebellious teen brought her valuable insights when she adopted a sibling group of four children from the foster care system.
Her story includes many challenges and personal struggles, including an alcoholic spouse, divorce, single motherhood and even the loss of her home to a fire in 2015. She credits her ability to process past loss and overcome trials to an unwavering faith in a loving God.
As a response to bullying, Bethany began homeschooling her biological child in 2001. She continued to homeschool post-adoption with all five children until the youngest graduated from high school.
Bethany began her own marketing firm in 2008 to allow her the flexibility she needed to homeschool and care for her children as a single mother. The agency is aptly named after her motto to “stay vertical” in her faith. Vertical Solutions Media has since grown from a one-woman marketing firm to a full-service marketing agency with a team of six marketing professionals.
When she’s not working, Bethany and her husband, Jeff, love to travel, play on the lake and watch movies. In their spare time, they buy rundown homes in their community and renovate them for resale. No matter how busy, Sunday evenings are always set aside for their big blended family to come together for a meal, love and lots of laughter.
Traylor and Melody are joined by author Joy Beth Smith to discuss her book, Party of One, celebrating seasons of singleness, and finding other joys in life.
Joy talks through her upbringing and various aspects of it that have impacted who she is as a person, a christian and a single. She discusses how she has had a desire to have a husband throughout her life, but she also appreciates her singleness as its own beautiful, life giving time on its own. Joy emphasizes that a season of singleness doesn’t mean you put your life on pause. There are so many things that single women put off because they are waiting for marriage. Something as simple as buying dishes for your house or taking a trip because you “want to do that with your husband”. She encourages women to live their life. Don’t live in the limbo of waiting. Do things you desire and buy things you love. That leads to an opportunity to combine lives with someone without losing your individuality.
Joy discusses her experiences with dating and how as a bold, independent woman impacts dealing with the dating world. She discusses her thoughts on how single women are empowered and how this often times shuts men down leading to a insecure man in the dating world.
Joy Beth Smith is a managing editor with Christianity Today and winner of the Evangelical Press Association’s Higher Goals in Christian Journalism Award. She’s been published in the Washington Post, Salt Lake Tribune, Virginia Pilot, and Christ and Pop Culture. After earning her MA degree in English Lit, Joy Beth had a brief stint as a teacher, but now she happily resides in the Chicagoland area, where she no longer has to give anyone permission to go to the bathroom.
Tray is joined by returning guest Chad Bird on episode 146 of the Undone Redone Podcast. They discuss Chad’s new book, Your God is Too Glorious, his own undoing and redoing, and the good news of the gospel. Chad discusses his story of undoing and the grace of God that brought him out of it.
Chad discusses his new book focusing on seeing God work in our everyday lives. Our lives are boring and regular, but those are the lives that God is excited to get involved in. Chad reflects on how you can open your heart and mind to seeing how God is working in and through your life. Diving into scripture and discussing the messy stories that bring hope to us that God will meet us in our brokenness. It is the messy, broken sinners that God uses for his most important work.
Tray and Melody are joined again by Pastor, Professor, and Executive Coach Chris McAlister to discuss ordering the chaos, your identity, the impact of the #metoo movement, and healthy marriage.
Chris discusses his views on the #MeToo movement and the positive and negative impacts it has on men and women. Discussing the difference within men and women’s identities and traversing the world of dating and romance within this culture.
Healthy marriages need both individuals to be confident in their own identity rather than relying on their spouses to define who they are. What is the big story that God is writing for you? Our spouse is not the adventure, but they are there to join us in that adventure. We can get excited to live life instead of just existing.
Chris is a speaker and has authored 5 books including The Stuck Book, Figure That Shift Out, and The Rider: Avoid Building A Life You Hate. He currently lives in Columbus, Ohio with his wife and three daughters.
Tray and Melody are joined by former model Leah Darrow to discuss sex, imitation love and true beauty. This conversation seemed from the recent awards show where influential people in Hollywood were standing up for the #MeToo movement and standing up against exploitation, but directly after this the trailer for the new Fifty Shades Freed movie was played. A movie that is entirely about abuse, imitation love and exploitation. Leah tweeted about the ignorance or compliance that Hollywood shows when they do things like this.
Leah takes us through her season of understanding the difference of authentic love and imitation love and the impact that imitation love has on your life. She talks about at 15 she chose imitation love and what that decision did to her conscious and how her worth and value got tied up in imitation love and imitation beauty.
Leah’s undone moment happened in the middle of a photoshoot where she God met her and told her “I made you for more”. At that moment Leah knew this “life” she had created wasn’t what would bring her fulfillment. She made a bold decision to pick up her things and walk out of this photoshoot. She realized that she had made Jesus a nobody but had made the world everything. That is when things began to shift and change for her and she decided to reclaim her role as a daughter of a king.
Leah is a former model and contestant on cycle 3 of America’s Next Top Model and has a driving passion to inspire women to do something beautiful with their lives. She is an international speaker, writer and host of the Do Something Beautiful podcast. Her book The Other Side Of Beauty allows Leah to expose the lies we are told about our worth being tied to our appearance. https://info.thomasnelson.com/the-other-side-of-beauty/
Leah and her husband live in St. Louis, Missouri where they are raising their three marvelous and crazy children. Follow Leah as she helps readers live truly beautiful lives that ultimately point to God on her website, Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.
Tray and Mel are joined by Philip Yancey for episode 143 to discuss his story of leaving the faith due to the fundamentalist church he grew up with and what brought him back to Christ. Tune-in as one of the leading Christian voices of our day describes his journey from understanding God as a scowling super cop to a loving and gracious Father and the specific elements that God used to reveal Himself.
Philip, Tray and Mel dive into a discussion of the beauty of sex in God’s plan for our lives and how he seeks to have a personal relationship with us. He often meets us in this unique and vulnerable place. They also reflect on how to not become slaves to earthly passions while still enjoying them as Christ did.
Philip reflects back on his childhood and growing up in the fundamentalist church and how this eventually led to the hardening of his heart and caused him to turn away from faith entirely. Growing up in a strict, fundamentalist church in the southern USA, a young Philip Yancey tended to view God as “a scowling Supercop, searching for anyone who might be having a good time—in order to squash them.” Yancey jokes today about being “in recovery” from a toxic church. “Of course, there were good qualities too. If a neighbor’s house burned down, the congregation would rally around and show charity—if, that is, the house belonged to a white person. I grew up confused by the contradictions. We heard about love and grace, but I didn’t experience much. And we were taught that God answers prayers, miraculously, but my father died of polio just after my first birthday, despite many prayers for his healing.”
Eventually Philip was brought back to God through nature, classical music and romantic love. These things brought Philip back to a true understanding of God his nature.
Yancey worked as a journalist in Chicago for some twenty years, editing the youth magazine Campus Life while also writing for a wide variety of magazines including Reader’s Digest, Saturday Evening Post, National Wildlife, and Christianity Today. In the process he interviewed diverse people enriched by their personal faith, such as President Jimmy Carter, Habitat for Humanity founder Millard Fuller, and Dame Cicely Saunders, founder of the modern hospice movement. In 1992 he and his wife Janet, a social worker and hospice chaplain, moved to the foothills of Colorado. His writing took a more personal, introspective turn even as his activities turned outward. “Writing is such an introspective act that I found myself looking for ways to connect with the planet bodily. My interests include skiing, climbing mountains, mountain-biking, golf, international travel, jogging, nature, theology (in small doses), politics, literature, and classical music.”
Tray and Mel are joined in studio by Jacob Simmons to discuss the often brushed aside topic of sexual brokenness and the Church. When it comes to sexual brokenness, the church remains silent on it because they often think, “Oh we’d never do something like that” and it becomes hard for someone to seek help form the church when they are comparing their shame to everyone else’s highlight reel.
Tray shares some staggering statistics released by the largest porn site in regards to consumption of pornography in 2017 showing that the enemy is hunting in the unique place of sexuality where God can meet us. There is a tsunami of lust pouring over us and its only a few clicks away. The church being silent has created a vacuum because how do we expect our children to have a healthy education of sex when it isn’t discussed.
Jacob is the Minister to single adults at Shades Mountain Baptist Church so he has the unique viewpoint of dealing with sexual brokenness in the young adult aspect of the church and single adults in the church. He offers his insight of how to reach this group of people and they discuss the topic of sexuality for young people.
When we directly or indirectly send the message that people inside the church don’t have these struggles, we lend this idea that to know better is to do better. But more information didn’t lead to better behavior. If more information did change us, Jesus didn’t have to die.
Jacob joined Shades Mountain Baptist Church as the Minister to Single Adults in May of 2015. Shades was his home church during college and seminary. He is over the unmarried adults in the church meaning he leads and administers Sunday school classes, Discipleship Groups, Bible Studies, and outreach. He’s also the minister who oversees Pastoral Care and Benevolence. Jacob is married to Suzanne, who is a hospital chaplain at UAB Hospital, and father to John.
In his spare time Jacob is also part of the improv group Ugly baby. He has been improvising since 2009 and has been able to perform in Birmingham, London, Edinburgh, Chicago, New York and Atlanta.
Tray and Mel are joined by Erik Guzman to discuss spirituality, his new book, and have an honest conversation about the beauty of Christianity.
Erik discusses how various people he has had the opportunity to speak with have impacted his life and put him on a path of discovery. Jesus takes us into not just the blatant stuff but the nuances of our brokenness and that really shows us the beauty and amazingness of Christ’s Grace.
Erik discusses his mini book The Gift of Addiction and how true Spirituality is just desperation. Even though it is messy and hard, working in addiction shows that desperation and how to let the Gospel work in their lives.
In a labyrinth, there are no dead ends, if you follow the path you will always end up at the center of it. I thought at first that this represented my walk with God but then I got a thought that was definitely from outside myself.
I was the one at the center of the labyrinth and Christ was walking to get to me. I had built this wall, this labyrinth for him to walk and sometimes he would come closer to the center and other times he would be sent further from it, but He is always coming for me.There is no way that He would not be able to reach me in that labyrinth.
Another example of this is building your own prison with your own life and when the circumstances of life start to destroy your prison, we begin to double down on that prison. Slowly the vines begin to come in and break down those walls further. What you don’t realize about those vines, the seeds of those vines are planted by God’s love.
What feels like death and destruction of your life is actually freeing you from your prison. That shadow you’ve been running to is cast by a light and if you turn towards the light you don’t see the shadow.
Erik is the author of The Gift of Addiction, a book that dives into the healing elements of pain in our lives, and also The Seed: A True Myth. He is VP of Communications & Executive Producer at Key Life Network. Erik is co-host of the nationally syndicated talk show Steve Brown, Etc. and announcer for Key Life. He has a BA in Mass Communication, an MBA, and is perpetually working toward a Masters in Theological Studies.
Erik’s wife tolerates his insanity and his three children enjoy it. Erik is also a drummer, a 5th degree black belt in Aikido, and a self-obsessed over-achiever who can’t stop talking about himself.
Tray and Melody spend episode 140 discussing the emotions and feelings that surround January 11th, which would have been their 26th wedding anniversary. As you may know Tray and Melody were married in 1992 and then their world unraveled when they divorced for 6 years before reconciling in 2008.
Tray shares a story of feeling totally alone on Christmas Day and running into a groomsman in his wedding at the movies when he was in line to see a movie alone. This was the first time he was seeing this man, who was part of his "community", since his wedding and his sin was on display.
Tray and Mel discuss how during their separation they viewed their anniversary as a sad reminder of this failed marriage. For Tray their anniversary was a constant reminder of his sin and what it had done to his family. Now they are able to look at January 11th as a day to reflect on how they have grown and changed.
They discuss the need for community and how the meaning of community has changed over the years. Mel discusses how their communities both together and apart have improved their marriage now. They discuss how knowing people is different from being known and having that real community of raw, honest truth of who you are deep down. The need for community is overpowered by the need for that community to be real.
Tray is joined by Pastor Paul Dunk to discuss his journey of grace, humility and growth. They discuss a theology of suffering, Tim Keller’s impact on his life and distinguishing the gospel of Christ and what people think of religion.
Paul is the founding pastor of KW Redeemer in Kitchener, Ontario and a graduate of Knox Theological Seminary with a Masters degree in Biblical and Theological Studies. He is a content contributor for the Knox Seminary blog as well as Christ Hold Fast. He is a MCO race school graduate but his present hobby is drinking espresso because its less expensive than fixing cars. He lives with his wife Susan in Waterloo with their three children.
Paul and his wife Susan had been involved in youth ministry since about 1994 and were very much in the prosperity faith zone. He was committed to being the next big thing in the world of Christianity and was preaching health and wealth for almost 15 years. They resigned in 2010 because they saw what they were teaching was unhelpful and unhealthy to the Church. They felt they couldn’t give their lives to the authoritarian view of how they were living and teaching.
After he resigned, Paul was speaking in New York at a conference and he had a friend tell him about Tim Keller and his book A Reason for God. His wife Susan came to the realization and awakening before Paul did and it created huge problems in their marriage. Paul felt totally contradicted to everything he had ever taught and was totally undone of his pride.
He went on a recalibration of about 5 years where he completely revaluated himself, his faith, and his calling to preaching. The human heart loves the formula and then when the formula doesn’t work, we just put the question mark on the person, rather than the formula. We have to realize there isn’t a clear cut formula and that grace and the love of the father is always there.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! On this the last show of 2017, Tray and Melody do a brief 'year in review' and look back on some of the milestones from 2017.
Tray and Melody are joined by Boz Tchividjian to discuss sexual abuse in the Church, grace and how we can assist in creating cultures of healing. God placed on his heart to take what you learn to train and equip his church to be the safest place for those who have been hurt to heal and for those that are doing the hurting. Boz, Tray and Mel discuss a topic that many people don’t want too discuss because it is messy and the victim has to live with the trauma for the rest of their lives.
Boz reflects back on how he ended up doing what it is he is doing and how after going to law school he wanted to be a prosecutor, but God really put the feeling of compassion for those who suffered from sexual abuse and through many experiences and situations he has found a passion at equipping the church to handle these issues head on.
Professor Boz Tchividjian is a former child abuse prosecutor who teaches Child Abuse and the Law and several other courses at Liberty Law. As a prosecutor for more than eight years, he created the first “Crimes Against Children” division at the office off the State attorney in the 7th Judicial Circuit of Florida. As a division chief, he was personally responsible for prosecuting hundreds of cases of child sexual abuse. He has spent in excess of 17 years using what he learned as a prosecutor to train and equip prosecutors, investigators, social workers, and medical personnel in handling various aspects of child sexual abuse cases.
Tchividjian is the founder and executive director of GRACE (Godly Response to Abuse in the Christian Environment), an organization that educates and equips faith communities to correctly respond to sexual abuse disclosures, while providing practical guidance on how to protect children and serve survivors.
He was a columnist for Religion News Service serving as an expert on issues related to child abuse and child protection. His weekly column was focused on the intersection of abuse and faith communities. His columns can now be found at www.netgrace.org/blog
He has also written a mini book entitled, Protecting Children from Abuse at Church: Steps to Prevent and Respond. As well he has authored numerous law journal articles related to the issue of child sexual abuse. His article titled, “Catching American Sex Offenders Overseas: A Proposal for a Federal International Mandated Reporting Law,” was published in the spring 2015 edition of the University of Missouri-Kansas City Law Review.
He is the third eldest grandchild of Reverend Billy Graham and is the co-author of a book titled, Thank you, Billy.
Traylor and Melody are joined by Michael Leahy, the founder and CEO of BraveHearts to discuss sexual addiction, the grace of the gospel, and an upcoming online summit, called Breaking Free Summit.
Michael grew up in a Christian home with all the markings of a “normal” childhood. After moving from LA to Spokane, Washington he began to feel like an outsider and was bullied. Michael looks back at the exact moment he was introduced to pornography on the playground at 11 years old. Once he had seen the porn and kept it a secret with the other boys, the bullying stopped.This led to Michael viewing sex as acceptance and porn gave him a semblance of manliness. Michael continues to reflect back on how this viewing led to a sexual addiction went onto seep into his adult life, marriage and ultimately through his divorce.
Michael is the founder and CEO of BraveHearts, a faith-based, mentoring-centric ministry that's been helping Christian men build and maintain lives of sexual integrity so they don't have to suffer the consequences of sexual sin. Michael has written 5 books on the subject, shared his story of redemption in hundreds of churches, colleges, and conferences. He is committed to helping those break free from the brokenness of sexual addiction.
Michael and BraveHearts are hosting a 10 day online virtual summit called Breaking Free summit. The summit will contain interviews and stories from 45 leading experts in the subject of pornography, sexual addiction, and recovery. All the materials are free for the first 48 hours and after that will be available through the all access pass which is available for purchase. Any money raised goes to BraveHearts and other organizations involved in the summit including Undone Redone. The summit will run from December 10-19 and you can find more information at BraveHearts.org.
Traylor and Melody are joined by Pastor Evan Welcher to discuss grace and death, suffering, the testing moments of trials, and finding joy again.
Evan discusses his journey and his story of losing his wife and trusting the Father in painful moments. After meeting at bible college and becoming friends, Danielle moved home to be close to her father while he battled cancer. Cancer was something that was always a part of their lives with her father battling it and Evan’s mother passing away from it. With the ups and downs of life, Evan and Danielle reconnected later on and began to date and eventually married. About 14 months after their wedding, Danielle was diagnosed with lymphoma. Evan reflects back on the feeling of having to watch a love one being sick and dealing with sorrow, pain and loss with the death of his bride.
Evan is senior Pastor of First Christian Church in Glenwood, Iowa. He graduated with a B.S. in Biblical studies from Emmanus Bible College in 2005. Evan’s goal in ministry is to “stir up love for Jesus Christ by the giving of great care and fidelity to the teaching of the scriptures”.
This week Tray and Melody talk Thanksgiving, giving thanks and what that looks like throughout the recovery process. Speaking from experience Tray and Mel offer words of wisdom, encouragement and motivation to make it through the often difficult season that is the holiday season when you are experiencing brokenness.
Tray and Melody are joined by Author and Pastor Randy Alcorn to discuss grace, books, the hope of God even in dark chapters of life, and the journey he takes you on. Randy shares with Tray and Mel the undone and redone moments that have occurred in his life and how these moments have shaped not only his career path but his family’s lives as well.
Randy is a New York Times bestselling author and has written over fifty books. Some of these titles include Courageous, Heaven, The Treasure Principle, and the Gold Medallion winner Safely Home. His books have been translated into over sixty languages and have sold over nine million copies. In addition Randy has written for many magazines including EPM’s Issues-oriented magazine Eternal Perspectives. He is active daily on Facebook and Twitter, has been a guest on more than 700 radio, television and online programs including Focus on the Family, FamilyLife Today, Revive Our Hearts, the Bible Answer Man, and Resurgence.
Randy served as a pastor for fourteen years prior to starting EPM in 1990. He has a Bachelor of Theology and Master of Arts in Biblical Studies from Multnomah University and an Honorary Doctorate from Western Seminary in Portland, Oregon. He has also taught on the adjunct faculties of both.
Randy currently resides in Gresham, Oregon, with his wife, Nanci. They have two daughters who are grown and married. They are also the proud grandparents to five grandsons. Randy enjoys hanging out with his family, biking, tennis, researching and reading.
Tray and Melody are joined by Pastor Joel Fitzpatrick on episode 132 to discuss a variety of topics such weakness, being a sinner saved by grace, family and how he gets his beard looking so great.
Bringing a sense of humor to everything he talks about, Joel is able to offer a positive outlook on sometimes difficult situations. Joel discusses how he as a Pastor handles people coming to him with struggles of sin and the aspect of humility that must come with confronting these situations. Joel emphasizes the importance of being okay with being vulnerable and weak in order to receive the grace of the Lord.
Joel says being from Southern California is at the core of his personality and explains a lot about who is Joel. Joel was born and raised in San Diego. He has a B.S. in Business Administration and earned his M. Div from Westminster Seminary in California.
Joel and his wife Ruth have been married for 15 years and have two children. Joel has served as a deacon for 12 years, a Ruling Elder for 3 years and is a Teaching Elder in the Presbyterian Church in America. He currently serves as the Associate Pastor for Family and Discipleship at North City Presbyterian Church.
Tray and Melody are joined by author and speaker Sarah Taras who is a lover of grace, theology and sharing her story. In episode 131, Tray, Melody and Sarah discuss her journey to discovering grace, the unconditional love of God, her podcasts, lust, and shame.
Sarah grew up Southern Baptist, married right out of high school and at the age of 20 she and her husband chose to try out a new church. They began attending a fundamentalist church for several years and Sarah discusses the struggles that came from within that church and leaving that church.
Sarah discusses being a women and struggling with what is often culturally and spiritually thought of as a man’s struggle of sin. She recalls sitting in church and listening to a sermon aimed directly at men and feeling the double weight of condemnation because not only was she struggling, but struggling with an issue that she as a woman was not supposed to struggle with. Sarah discusses how community and the freedom that comes with stepping into the open to experience the forgiveness Jesus offers.
On episode 130, Traylor and Melody are joined by Author and speaker Marci Preheim to discuss a variety of topics ranging from sexual culture in Hollywood, Fundamentalism, pride and pornography, and awakening to scripture. Marci, Tray and Mel talk through personal experiences of being stuck in the paradigm of performance and how things look to the outside world. Marci bravely speaks out against a culture and community that she felt stuck in.
Marci was born in Lincoln, Nebraska but moved to Hollywood, California as a teenager hoping to pursue modeling. She was born and raised in a very strict fundamentalist conservative church and although she boasts that she memorized books of the Bible, it was in California at the age of 21 that she actually came to know the Savior through the ministry of a local church. Within a year of her conversion she became involved in a women’s prison ministry and discovered her passion for the sharing the gospel publicly.
Marci has been married to her husband Arnie since 1993 and they have two children together and currently live in Nashville, Tennessee. Marci regularly teaches women’s Bible study at the Community Bible Church and has led monthly chapel services for women at the Nashville Rescue Mission, a Hope Center for female recovering addicts.
Marci has been blessed with the passion to teach the Bible in a simple and understandable way which she uses on a daily basis. She is the author of Grace is Free: One Woman’s Journey From Fundamentalism to Failure to Faith and Little Saviors. She is also a co-host on the podcast Fundiland sees Red and is a writer for key life. Most recently Marci has been bringing to light the issue of sexual assault with her piece Do You See Me, about a seminary student who experienced sexual assault while in seminary.
Marci’s passion is for women to rediscover the power of the gospel as it applies to our everyday lives. Visit her website and learn more about her writings, teachings and to read her blog posts.
On episode 129, Tray and Melody are joined by therapist Tim Tedder to discuss infidelity, betrayal, and affairs.
Tim walks us through how he came into counseling, personal experiences that continue to impact him today, and how he brings hope and healing to wounded people around him. This is a truly impactful and resource-filled episode that you don’t want to miss.
Prior to earning his Master’s Degree in Counseling from Indiana Wesleyan University. Tim spent nearly 20 years as a leader and teacher, focusing on spiritual and personal growth issues for individuals and families. In his speaking and counseling, he aims to creatively communicate a message of hope and healing to wounded people with a special focus on helping couples in crisis. This passion of helping to provide healing and hope to wounded people was made clear in his early 20s.
Tim is a father and grandfather. He worked as a family therapist in Indiana before moving with his wife, Sharon, to Orlando in 2008 to join the staff of Charis Counseling Center. In 2009, he began developing Affairhealing.com, which has become a popular affair recovery resource for people around the world.
In the summer of 2013, Time and Sharon started their own private practice: Currents Counseling Services, LLC.
Tim is the Author of Affair Healing which is available for purchase at http://www.affairhealingbook.com/. The book provides chapters with guided activities, 18 worksheets, and a free download of Affair Healing: A Recovery Guide for Couples. Learn more about The Recovery Room podcast here. affairhealing.com/podcast.html
For a FREE 5-day course and 50% off of Tim’s books for you our Undone Redone listeners, go to www.affairhealing.com/redone.
Find out more about coaching available through Undone Redone at www.undoneredone.com/coaching.
To learn more about the resources Melody has created to help women through betrayal visit www.Lifebeyondbetrayal.com or text lifebeyondbetrayal to 44222 to receive her 3 FREE videos.
Don’t forget to see The Heart Of Man in theaters, October 17th, for its encore presentation! Find tickets and learn more at http://www.heartofmanmovie.com.
If you would like to become a monthly ministry partner to help support the show, please visit www.undoneredone.com/ministry-partners to make your tax-deductible gift securely online. Your gift helps us reach more people with Undone Redone's message of hope and reconciliation.
Tray and Melody are joined by Pastor Bob Hiller on episode 128 to discuss a variety of topics. Bringing a sense of humor to a conversation about sports, faith, binge watching Netflix shows, love, Christian Celebrity culture and sustaining grace Bob Hiller makes episode 128 one you can’t miss.
Bob talks through his opinion on “Christian Celebrity culture”, how Ministry has become a sector of marketing and how it is affecting The Church. The job of the Gospel is not to give you a pretty life, but to forgive you and teach you to love.
Bob, Tray and Mel talk through the self gratification found through social media and the issues that arise from this. The social media culture feeds into the idea of the perfect life and exposing the unbelief you have in your life. They discuss how this creates an unhealthy culture of living up to others impression of you and how perfect your life appears. This is directly affecting The Church and as Christians exposes ourselves to a narcissistic way of life and living.
Bob grew up in the Lutheran church and his father is also a Lutheran pastor. Rev. Bob Hiller is senior pastor of Community Lutheran Church in Escondido, CA. He has a deep passion for preaching the word and credits his dad for instilling a love for the word of God and theology. Bob is married with three children. He is a weekly contributor to The Jagged Word blog and a regular contributor to the 1517 Legacy Project’s blog. He writes about theology, sports, and whatever might be bothering him at the time.
Tray and Melody are joined by Daniel Emery Price on episode 127 of the Undone Redone podcast to discuss scandalous stories, finding your own faith, music, and the journey of faith. Daniel reflects on moments where he felt lost, confused, empowered and moments of Christ clinging to you showing the true scandal of grade.
As the son of a Pastor, Daniel Emery Price was raised in church and various kinds of Christian ministry in a small town in rural Arkansas. He began writing and performing music in his teen years and was heavily involved in worship ministry before moving to Seattle in his early twenties to pursue a career in music. He later moved to Phoenix and returned to leading worship and took a leadership position in youth/ collegiate ministry, before moving back to Arkansas where the studied theology, church history and devoted himself to finding where he stood in faith. He became involved in a Bible study, which grew into a bigger community and eventually led to him being a part of planting Trinity Church NWA in 2009 and now serves as Pastor there.
Daniel now lives in Northwest Arkansas with his wife Jessica and their daughter Anna. He isa regular guest on theological radio shows, podcasts, and is a conference speaker. Daniel is a contributor to Christ Hold Fast and co-host of the weekly podcasts, 40 Minutes in the Old Testament and 30 Minutes in the New Testament.
He is the author of the forthcoming book, Seven Scandalous Stories: A Sort of Commentary on Parables.
On episode 126, Traylor and Melody are joined by author and speaker Dr. Scott Keith to discuss fatherhood, what it means to be a Christian man, grace, marriage and thoughts on manhood. Scott reflects back on mentors, experiences and the impact they have had on his life and his breaking into manhood. Scott discusses the desperate need for Christian men needing to be role-models and strong father figures for young men growing up in today’s modern culture.
Dr. Scott Keith is the Executive Director of 1517 The Legacy Project and Adjunct Professor of Theology at Concordia University in Irvine, California. He is a co-host of The Thinking Fellows Podcast and a contributor to The Jagged Word, 1517 The Legacy Project, and Christ Hold Fast blogs. Scott earned his doctorate from Foundation House Oxford, under the sponsorship of the Graduate Theological Foundation, studying under Dr. James A Nestingen. Dr. Keith’s research focused on the doctrine of good works in the writings of Philip Melanchthon.
Scott’s book, Being Dad: Father as a Picture of God’s Grace, deals with the way father are treated in modern culture and how fatherhood is discussed. Bringing in personal experiences with family, students, mentors and friends to bring to light a subject that is so desperately searching for attention. In addition he brings his scholarly personality, his Christian faith and a passion for story to navigate the reader to a better future.
On episode 125, Traylor and Melody are joined by Author Matt Johnson to discuss faith, his book Getting Jesus Wrong, belonging in a community and all that life throws at you.
Matt Johnson says his book is about “everything breaking” and describes it as the spiritual component of a mid life crisis. Throughout the book he discusses various stop points in his life and faith over the past 25 years and reflecting back on it all.
Matt grew up in a household where his spiritual journey really meant going to Christmas and Easter services, but not really connecting the dots between his life and Jesus being important to it. Around high school Matt says his older sister brought the entire family to faith. Matt discusses his faith journey since then and the various places he has found community and how they impacted him.
On episode 124 of the Undone Redone podcast, Melody and Traylor are joined by Tony Anderson. Tony Anderson is an executive producer and composer for the upcoming film, The Heart of Man, which hits theaters September 14, 2017. Tony lends his passions and creative voice in an impactful way through the upcoming project. In this episode, Tony elaborates on the creative process behind his impact on the score of the upcoming film and how it has been brought to life before his eyes. In perhaps the most impactful and best display of his relentless work is the orchestral recording in Bratislava, Slovakia for the score. Tony spent 6 months pouring himself into the film, the story and pulled out the melody and themes that were recorded by a 40-piece string section halfway around the world.
Tony, who although not classically trained, is a world-class independent composer, producer and recording artist. Based out of his studio in Lexington, KY, he has had his music licensed by the biggest brands in the world such as Apple, Tesla, ESPN, Facebook and Red Bull. Tony founded Unearthed in 2010 in an effort to see this film come to fruition and has remained at the head of it since.
Tony’s music can be streamed on Spotify, Apple Music, Amazon Music or at www.tonyandersonmusic.com.
On episode 123 of the Undone Redone podcast, Tray and Melody are joined by Brian Bird. Brian serves as Executive Producer in the upcoming film The Heart Of Man which comes out September 14, 2017. In this episode Brian discusses his passion for film making
Tray and Melody are joined by author Preston Sprinkle on episode 122 to discuss faith, sexuality, gender and courageous love. Bridging the gap between conservatives and the LGBTQ community with an open and honest dialogue is what Preston strives to do.
In this week's episode Tray and Mel are joined by Kevin Triplett who lends his voice and story to the upcoming film, The Heart Of Man, coming out September 14, 2017. Kevin talks the traumas he witnessed in the line of duty and how this led to his addiction.
On this week’s episode Mel and Tray are joined by Justin Torrence who makes his debut as actor in leading role in the upcoming film The Heart Of Man. Justin plays the prodigal in the film hitting theatres September 2017. Justin talks religion and his journey to finding his role in The Heart of Man with Mel and Tray.
Justin was born in Chicago where he lived until his family moved to Atlanta at the age of 11. Although acting was always a passion he did not pursue it until the end of his 20’s when he began training at an acting school in Hawaii. Torrence has produced award-winning content, written, directed, and served as art director and prop master.
Be sure to connect with Justin on his website http://jtorrence.com/.
Check out The Heart Of Man coming out September 14th at http://heartofmanmovie.com/. Join Mel and Tray at the Birmingham showing. You can get your tickets here https://www.eventbrite.com/e/the-heart-of-man-birmingham-movie-screening-tickets-35608518036?aff=efbeventtix
On this week's episode Mel and Tray are joined by Noel Bouché of PureHOPE as he lends his voice to the upcoming film The Heart Of Man. Noel aims to inspire and equip believers to pursue a world free of sexual brokenness and exploitation through personal transformation.
Noel worked as a litigation attorney in New York, Washington D.C., and Cincinnati prior to joining PureHOPE as the Chief Executive in 2008. Noel lives in the Dallas/Ft. Worth area with his wife and two daughters.
On this week's show, Tray and Mel are joined by author, speaker, and life-coach Seth Alan Taylor who openly shares his journey of recovery from pornography addiction and offers hope and help for fellow sojourners.
Seth's first book, Feels Like Redemption, leans into the issue of porn addiction, but is a book for everyone who seeks to experience freedom in their lives. Trained by Dr. Dan Allender at the Seattle School of Theology and Psychology, Seth brings deep insight and wisdom to this important question of “How Do People Change?”
A few quotes from this episode:
“We carry our trauma in our bodies, but we survive in our brains.”
“I started training myself how to feel.”
“Instead of trying to master our trauma, we must move into it.”
“There is no resurrection without a crucifixion.”
“We must stop seeking lives that have no scars.”
Get Seth's book, Feels Like Redemption, on Amazon at http://amzn.to/2v7uFmF.
Connect with Seth on Facebook, Twitter and at sethalantaylor.com.
Tray and Mel welcome author and speaker Elyse Fitzpatrick to the Undone Redone podcast! Elyse is the author of 23 books on daily living and the Christian life, including Good News For Weary Women, Because He Loves Me, Found in Him, and Give Them Grace.
Elyse is a frequent speaker at women’s conferences, has been married for over 40 years, and has three adult children and six grandchildren.
Connect with Elyse at www.elysefitzpatrick.com.
Episode 116 features writer, speaker, and spoken-word artist, Jackie Hill Perry, whose work has been featured in the Washington Times, The 700 Club, Desiring God, and The Gospel Coalition.
Jackie lends her voice to the upcoming film, The Heart of Man, through her story of abuse and coming out of a homosexual lifestyle.
Jackie's debut Christian wrap album is The Art of Joy. CLICK HERE to purchase now.
Episode 115 of the show features Jessica Thompson, co-author of “Give Them Grace: Dazzling Your Kids With the Love of Jesus” and “Answering Your Kids’ Toughest Questions”…two fantastic books on grace-based parenting.
In this interview, you will hear Jessica’s heart for men, women, and children to be freed from the bondage of moralism so that they can live in the freedom offered by the Gospel.
Here are a few great quotes from this episode:
“God showed me that my goodness would never be good enough…that I needed the goodness of another.”
“I got saved in Bible college.”
“I’m not a perfect parent. I’m not recommending myself…only the Gospel.”
“You will only be dazzled by Jesus when you see what a great sinner you are. Why would we be dazzled by a love that we feel we have earned.”
"We have a Father who loves and adopts rebels."
Kendra Fletcher, author of Lost & Found: Losing Religion and Finding Grace, joins Tray and Mel for episode 114 of the show.
Kendra is a homeschooling mother of 8 and popular conference speaker. She and her husband came close to losing 3 of their 8 children over the span of 18 months and, in the process, discovered that their clean and neat Christian formula wasn’t working.
Kendra is passionate about addressing the quiet legalism that so easily infiltrates Christian communities and exposes the dangers of focusing on anything but the finished work of Christ.
John courageously and vulnerably shares his story of abuse in the film and again in today’s interview and speaks to the debilitating shame that followed as he spent years covering up his secret. Listen as he shares the wonderful freedom that followed when he finally revealed his secret and experienced unconditional love instead of the rejection he anticipated.
Here are a few powerful quotes from this episode:
“Accountability is a great word for a job description, but a terrible word for the human heart. It becomes a function of law that leads to hiding.”
“Out of the stunning reality of God’s grace, we begin to sin less and love more. The power of the control cycle begins to fade.”
“You can behave correctly from the wrong motive and God isn’t interested.”
“I’m capable of absolutely anything except stealing rap music.”
“Grace does not demand.”
“If you are not willing to allow him to get out of the doghouse, you will never be loved by a man again, but by a little boy.”
“Forgiveness is almost impossible when we stay focused on the horizontal relationship. Vertical forgiveness let’s us off the hook.”
Author and Pastor RJ Grunewald, a self-proclaimed theology nerd, joins Tray and Mel for episode 112 of the show to discuss law and grace, his latest book Reading Romans with Luther, and the many ways we attempt to hide our true selves from those around us.
In this episode, RJ shares the paradoxical truth that the things we spend so much energy trying to hide often become the tools God uses for the mission of the Gospel. Whatever you are facing today, be encouraged that you do not have to face it alone.
It is often tempting to hide who we really are to the outside world and project that we have it all together. We have many seemingly valid reasons for why we do this — to be a good witness to the world around us; to pretend the Christian life produces nothing but happiness and joy; and often, simply because we fear that no one could relate to who we really are.
But God has never called us to a pretend life where we cover up the truth about ourselves. As we see throughout scripture, it is often our past blunders that provide rich redemptive material for Him who is “working all things together for our good.”
Author and speaker Chad Bird joins Tray and Mel for this episode of the show to courageously share his own undone/redone story and to help us understand that, instead of icons of shame, our scars can become emblems of God’s grace and mercy toward us.
Chad is devoted to honest Christianity that addresses the raw realities of life. As he eloquently proclaims in this interview, the Gospel is for broken, messed up people.
Chad has served as an assistant professor of OT theology, contributed hymns to the Lutheran Service Book, and cohosts the podcast “40 Minutes in the OT.” He holds Master's degrees from Concordia Theological Seminary and Hebrew Union College. In addition to writing two books, Christ Alone and The Infant Priest, he has contributed articles to Modern Reformation, The Federalist, Concordia Pulpit Resources, Mockingbird and other publications. His book with Eerdmans, Night Driving: Notes from a Prodigal Soul, is now available for pre-order at Amazon. His book, Your God Is Too Glorious, will be published by Baker Books in 2018. He is also a regular contributor to christholdfast.org and 1517legacy.com.
Therapist Jay Stringer joins us for episode 110 of the show to discuss story and the importance of understanding our trauma and wounds in order to experience true healing. Jay shares the difference between the quick-fix band-aid that we often turn to and the healing process that takes time and intentionality.
This interview also offers a powerful discussion about the paramount reality of shame in our lives and how it impacts our core-beliefs and even how we see and hear God. Jay leans on his clinical experience to explain the counterintuitive solution to shame - turning toward it and facing it head-on.
Author, Speaker, Teacher and Professor Dr. Dan Allender joins Tray and Mel for episode 109 of the show to discuss the upcoming film, The Heart of Man, and the importance of entering into our own narrative in order for true healing to occur. An expert in sexual trauma, Dr. Allender shares practical insight into the journey to wholeness.
A co-founder of The Seattle School of Theology & Psychology, he is the author of The Wounded Heart, The Healing Path, To Be Told, and God Loves Sex, and the co-author of Intimate Allies, The Cry of the Soul, Bold Love, and Bold Purpose.
Don’t miss Dr. Allender and Tray and Mel in the upcoming film, The Heart of Man, a modern retelling of the Prodigal story that invites the sons and daughters of God to discover His relentless love for them. The movie will be shown across the country on Thursday, September 14th!
Sarah Siegand joins Tray and Mel for episode #108 to discuss online digital safety and Parents Who Fight, an organization she runs with her husband Jesse.
Parents Who Fight is a place parents can get connected to other parents and organizations who are proactively engaged in the battle for this generation.
Sarah is a contributor to Undone Redone’s MySecureFamily.com and provides great insight on this episode from her own experience. You can connect with Sarah via Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.
Author Erik Guzman joins Tray and Melody for episode 107 and talks about how we often commodify our experiences instead of allowing ourselves to live fully present in the moment.
He is the author of The Gift of Addiction, a book that dives into the healing elements of pain in our lives, and also The Seed: A True Myth that has just been released.
Contact Erik on Facebook and Twitter and read his writing at KeyLife.org.
William Paul Young, author of the bestselling book, The Shack, joins Tray and Melody on episode 106 to share his story of abuse, addiction, and finding God in the middle of his pain.
Much has been written and debated among Christians about Young’s depiction of God in The Shack, but this interview allows the listener to ‘walk a mile in his shoes’, so to speak. Paul doesn’t mince words about his own sexual abuse as a child as well as his painful journey to discover himself and the true heart of God.
Episode 105 of the podcast features filmmaker Jason Pamer, producer of the upcoming film The Heart of Man that hits theaters later this Spring. The Heart of Man is a feature-length film that dramatically retells the timeless story of the prodigal son along with provocative interviews with thought-leaders on the subjects of brokenness, identity, and grace.
In this interview, Jason shares how he got into filmmaking, his approach to the creative process, and his commitment to excellence in capturing stories on film.
Author, blogger, and speaker Carey Scott joins Tray and Mel on episode 104 to discuss her book Untangled: Let God Loosen the Knots of Insecurity in Your Life and the problems that arise when we try to get our value and worth from anything apart from God.
In this fun, heart-felt interview, Carey Scott affirms that we are accepted, loved, beautiful, and treasured and gives practical strategies for escaping performance-based living.
Connect with Carey on her blog at www.careyscott.org!
Author Grace Thornton joins Tray and Mel for Episode 103 of the podcast to discuss relationship expectations and the ‘happily ever-after’ that often doesn’t turn out the way we had planned.
In her book, “I Don’t Wait Anymore: Letting Go of Expectations and Grasping God’s Adventure for You”, Thornton describes her wrestling match with God after discovering that He was not providing her with the husband and 2.5 kids like she anticipated. Along the way, she found that the story He was writing was better than the one she had planned for herself.
As we celebrate Valentine’s Day, this honest discussion is a great reminder to all of us to keep our relationships in proper perspective.
It is hard to believe that it has been four years since we launched the Undone Redone podcast! A big ‘thank you’ to all of our listeners! You guys make this journey so much fun!
In episode #2 of the show, way back in February of 2013, we talked about the pros and cons of Valentine’s Day and we want to revisit that theme here on episode #102.
With all of the fun and excitement that Valentine’s Day can bring, it can also provide a tremendous amount of unspoken expectations and pressures that can lead to problems in a relationship. In this episode, Tray and Mel talk love languages, being a student of your spouse, and being a ‘year-round’ Valentine.
Episode 101 of the Undone Redone podcast features an insightful discussion with Kimm Crandall, author of Christ in the Chaos and Beloved Mess: God’s Perfect Love for Your Imperfect Life.
In this interview, Kimm shares her own journey from performing for God’s approval to resting in his wonderfully scandalous grace. Kimm writes regularly at www.kimmcrandall.com, an online respite that she describes as “a safe place for sinners who long for relatable, gospel-saturated, grace-washed articles and resources.
We hope that this conversation with Kimm will help you find Christ in your chaos and God’s unconditional love in the midst of your mess.
Remember...Life is Messy. Bring Your Boots!
Author, speaker, podcast host, seminary professor, and all around great guy, Steve Brown, joins Tray and Mel for the 100th episode of the Undone Redone podcast to discuss the scandal of grace, 3 free sins, Luther’s invitation to “sin boldly”, and the Coming Back Stronger Men’s Conference.
In his own refreshing style that blends orthodoxy and controversy, humor and profundity, Dr. Brown points out why it is so difficult for the human heart to accept the freedom offered to us by the Gospel and the ways we try to hide who we really are.
If you would like to hear more of Dr. Brown on grace and the gospel, don’t miss his podcast called Steve Brown Etc on iTunes.
To see the video of this interview, go to http://www.undoneredone.com/ur100 or on YouTube at https://youtu.be/WFWehmLXZ6g.
Please subscribe to the show and, if you like what you hear, consider giving us a rating and review on iTunes.
David Zahl, editor-in-chief of the Mockingbird blog and one of the speakers for the upcoming Coming Back Stronger Men’s Conference (www.comingbackstronger.com) being held in Birmingham January 27 -28, joins Tray and Mel on episode 99 for a frank discussion about grace, rock-n-roll, ministering to folks burned by church, and the pressure put on men to always be strong.
David’s unassuming, laid-back style is refreshing and his ability to communicate the Gospel of grace is second-to-none. And don’t miss his cover article in Christianity Today this month that speaks to the on-going tension we have between law and grace.
Connect with David and Mockingbird Ministries by going to www.mbird.com and check out their fantastic podcast called Mockingcast on iTunes!
All of us at Undone Redone wish you the very best as we begin an exciting new year!
In this episode, Tray and Mel briefly discuss Alabama’s loss in the National Championship game and dive into a discussion of the gospel as it relates to a topic that is always very popular at this time of year: Resolutions.
While New Year’s Resolutions are all about discipline, effort, and willpower as we try to make changes in various areas of our lives, most of us know that, while trying harder might produce temporary change, true, lasting change can only come as we come to the realization that we are powerless to change ourselves. The gospel calls us to resignation, not resolution.
If you have enjoyed the show, please take a moment and give us a rating and review and subscribe to us on iTunes!
We close out 2016 on the Undone Redone podcast with a powerful conversation with discipleship coach, Scott Perkins, author of Tree of Lies. Scott is a recovering people pleaser and ex-pastor who shares his journey of being stripped of everything that he was running to for his identity and his discovery of his true self along the way.
Scott is making available a resource for Undone Redone listeners to help us understand our Biblical identity and its impact on our lives. Simply go to treeoflies.com/redone to download this free worksheet.
CLICK HERE to get Scott’s book, Tree of Lies, and go to http://www.treeoflies.com to make contact with Scott and his ministry.
Merry Christmas from Undone Redone! In this episode, Tray and Melody discuss the wonderful good news and powerful implications of the proclamation of Emmanuel: God with us!
Tune in as Tray and Melody take a close look at the lineage of Jesus recorded in Matthew 1 that offers hope for us all as we see God using broken people to bring perfection into the world. The Good News that we celebrate at Christmas is that God is with us steps into the mess with us. Unlike what we often believe, God is not expecting us to clean things up on our own, but to come to Him just as we are.
Peace to you as you celebrate “God With Us” this Christmas season!
Episode 95 features a topic that has never been dealt with directly on the Undone Redone podcast — death.
Just five years ago, business consultant James Bishop was on top of world, preparing to start traveling with his wife Jane to watch their twin boys play baseball at Jacksonville State University. In their sons’ Freshman season, after a win over Auburn where their son Michael had gone 3 for 3, Jane died suddenly after suffering a massive brain hemorrhage on the drive home.
In this heartfelt interview, James courageously shares his journey through the depression and anger he experienced after Jane’s death and provides profound insight into how God used her death to teach him how to live.
Please consider sharing this episode with your family and friends who need to hear this important perspective on death.
Happy Thanksgiving from all of us here at the Undone Redone podcast! In this episode we reflect on the many things we have to be thankful for and also remember how the holiday season can magnify pain for those who are experiencing difficulty in their relationships.
If you are enjoying the Undone Redone podcast, please consider giving us a rating and review on iTunes and also sharing it with your family and friends!
Episode #93 discusses an important topic that is often overlooked in our society…especially in the Church.
Our guest, Carrie Wilson, courageously shares her story that includes a struggle with sexual sin as a female that ultimately led to an STD. Our enemy loves to keep us alone and isolated in shame, believing the lie that nobody is like us. Sharing our stories of brokenness helps to create the “Me Too” community that leads to healing and lasting change. Carrie boldly shares her story in order to offer hope and help to other females who are currently believing that they are alone and that no one can relate.
Sexual brokenness is plaguing our culture and it is not just a man’s issue. Listen to our interview with Carrie and consider sharing it with your family and friends. Someone you know needs to hear this message of hope! If you are enjoying the Undone Redone podcast, please consider giving us a rating and review! Remember…Life is Messy. Bring Your Boots!
On this episode of the Undone Redone podcast, Tray and Melody have therapist Melea Stephens in the Messy Boots Studio once again to discuss the growing violence toward women that is being fueled by the pornography industry. Violence toward women is being normalized as our “rape culture” continues to grow.
If you are enjoying the Undone Redone podcast, please consider giving us a rating and review! Remember…Life is Messy. Bring Your Boots!
Episode 91 of the Undone Redone podcast features a candid interview with Lauren Greutman, author of The Recovering Spender and founder of IAmThatLady.com, a top frugal-living website dedicated to helping women contribute to their family's financial needs.
Lauren regularly shares her story and her money-saving tips on such shows as Today, Good Morning America, Fox & Friends, Dr. Oz, and Rachel Ray.
If you are enjoying the show, please consider leaving us a rating & review on iTunes!
Tray and Mel sit down with Kento Morgan and Matty Patterson from Northern Ireland and discuss the Troubles, Southern food, and their relationship with God. This is a fun and energetic conversation with two young men who love the Lord and who are having a blast in the USA.
If you are enjoying the show, please consider letting us know by giving us a rating and review on iTunes and Stitcher Radio!
Cliff Sims, founder of Alabama’s Yellowhammer News and host of Yellowhammer Radio, joins Tray and Melody on this episode of Undone Redone to discuss faith, politics, and living life on mission. With humble beginnings as Cliff’s personal blog, Yellowhammer News has become the trusted source for what is going on in Alabama.
Connect with Cliff on Twitter at @Cliff_Sims.
This week’s episode features a real and raw conversation around the backyard fire pit with Tray and a few of his friends about the importance of authentic community among men. So many men live lonely, isolated lives…longing to be known, but hiding their true self behind a mask of competency and strength. The men in this episode are on the journey of discovering their true selves and are realizing that they cannot do this alone.
If you are enjoying the Undone Redone podcast, please consider sharing it with a friend or family member! Also, please do us a favor and rate the show on iTunes, Google Play, or Stitcher Radio!
Steve and Barbara Ulmann join Tray and Melody on this episode of the Undone Redone podcast. Steve experienced tremendous success as the CEO of an international plastics company, but, as you will hear in this interview, relationships have always been very important to him. Barbara is a lay counselor and board member for multiple ministries who contributes her wisdom and experience to relational and educational ministries nationwide.
In 2014, Steve and Barbara began work on LoveLikeJesus.com, a community of Christian leaders providing tools, resources, and fellowship to equip the family and culture to authentically love like Jesus loved.
If you are enjoying the Undone Redone podcast, please consider giving us a rating and review! Remember…Life is Messy. Bring Your Boots!
In this episode of the Undone Redone podcast, Tray and Mel discuss their recent getaway to the Whitestone Country Inn in Kingston, Tennessee and a fabulous Mother’s Day weekend. They also share their chat with Dawn Hawkins at the recent Set Free Summit in Greensboro, North Carolina. Dawn, quickly becoming a regular on Undone Redone, is the Executive Director of the National Center on Sexual Exploitation based in Washington DC.
If you’ve enjoyed the show, please consider leaving us a rating and review on iTunes and Stitcher Radio!
Dina Alexander, Executive Director of Educate and Empower Kids, joins Tray and Mel in this episode to talk about some of the brand-new books and resources just released by her organization. 30 Days of Sex Talks, 30 Days to a Stronger Child, and How to Talk to Your Kids About Pornography are all designed to equip parents as they engage the hearts of their children on these important topics.
Discover more about Educate and Empower Kids by going to their web site at www.educateempowerkids.org.
If you are enjoying the show, please consider giving us a rating and review and sharing it with a friend!
Welcome to episode 82 of the Undone Redone podcast! We are kicking off our series of interviews recorded at the recent Set Free Summit in Greensboro, NC with Jasper Hall and Aszia Walker of pureHOPE. pureHOPE is a ministry based in Dallas that is working to see a world free of sexual exploitation and brokenness.
Please take a moment and rate the show on iTunes and Stitcher Radio! You can contact Tray and Melody at email@example.com. God bless!
Our sex-saturated culture is creating a huge wake of devastation that is having a tremendous impact on families. This impact is being felt inside the church as well. In this episode, Tray and Mel discuss how to deal with sexual brokenness in the church and offer practical solutions to help you put together a holistic strategy for your congregation.
This week’s guest on the Undone Redone podcast, Shea Lowery, joins Tray and Mel to discuss her story of how lines can get crossed in relationships when we are not careful. Shea provides valuable insight from firsthand experience to help prevent these lines from being crossed and about God’s forgiveness when they are. Information about Shea’s ministry can be found at www.livesbeingrestored.com.
In this episode of the Undone Redone podcast, Kevin DeVries joins Tray to discuss finding grace through adventure. Kevin is an explorer who shares his story of finding healing though pain and ultimately, God’s grace. The movie “Finding Noah” documents his journey to find Noah’s Ark. His story and more can be found at www.graceexplorations.com.
Jacque Watkins is back on the Undone Redone podcast for part 2 of her interview. Jacque blogs regularly at www.jacquewatkins.com and is the host of the popular podcast Mud Stories, a podcast dedicated to bringing inspiration in your muddiest moments. In this 2-part interview, Jacque openly and vulnerably shares God’s faithfulness as He met her in her own ‘mud story’.
If you enjoyed this episode, please consider giving us a rating and review on iTunes and/or Stitcher Radio! God bless!
This week’s guest on the Undone Redone podcast is Jacque Watkins. Jacque blogs regularly at www.jacquewatkins.com and is the host of the popular podcast Mud Stories, a podcast dedicated to bringing inspiration in your muddiest moments. In this 2-part interview, Jacque openly and vulnerably shares God’s faithfulness as He met her in her own ‘mud story’.
If you enjoyed this episode, please consider giving us a rating and review on iTunes and/or Stitcher Radio! God bless!
Author and therapist Dr. Gordon Bals returns to the Undone Redone podcast to discuss marital intimacy and how to cultivate it in a relationship. Dr. Bals shares how to build intimacy in marriage beyond just physical intimacy, and how this can impact intimacy in the bedroom.
In this episode of the Undone Redone podcast, Tray and Mel take an in-depth look at Justin and Lindsey Holcomb's fantastic book for parents of young children called God Made All Of Me: A Book to Help Children Protect Their Bodies.
This book is a wonderful tool to help parents educate their children in an age-appropriate way about their bodies...especially their private parts. As the introduction of the book states, "Education is vitally important in preventing inappropriate sexual behavior or contact. By teaching children about their bodies and discussing appropriate and inappropriate touch, you are helping them understand their ability to say "No" to unwanted touch, which will help them if anyone ever tries to hurt or trick them."
Circle is a revolutionary new product that is helping parents everywhere take control of managing all of their home’s connected devices.
In this episode, Jelani Memory, one of Circle's founders, chats with Tray and Melody about the genesis of Circle and all of its incredible features and benefits.
Circle provides a brand new way for families to manage content across all devices and an easy way to filter content, limit screen time and set a bedtime for every device in the home! It's simple. If you have children or grandchildren, you need Circle in your home!
Author Luke Gilkerson and his wife Trisha, who blog regularly at Intoxicated on Life, join hosts Tray and Mel on this episode of the Undone Redone podcast to provide specific tips for parents in our current age of rampant technology and stimulus overload.
Marriage and Family Therapist Melea Stephens joins Tray and Mel again on the Undone Redone podcast to discuss the important topic of parenting in the digital age. Melea shares invaluable information from real-life cases that helps parents understand that age-appropriate dialogue with their children about pornography and sex is just as important as blocks and filters in the home.
Our good friend Todd Gerelds, author of the book Woodlawn, joins us to tell the behind the scenes story of the grace awakening that occurred on a High School football team during the ’73 and ’74 football seasons that helped bring healing and reconciliation to an entire city. Gerelds provides the backdrop of racial tension in and around Birmingham that made the revival on the Woodlawn team all the more profound. If you are enjoying the show, don’t forget to leave us a rating and review on iTunes!
Got questions? Email us at firstname.lastname@example.org or leave us a voicemail at www.undoneredone.com. Thanks for listening!
After a brief hiatus due to our speaking schedule, we are back with another great interview with Travis Reed, founder and filmmaker at The Work of the People, an “independent ecumenical platform that produces and publishes multimedia to stir imagination, spark discussion and move people toward discovery and transformation”. In this raw conversation with Tray and Mel, Travis shares his painful yet redemptive journey that includes four stepdads in four years and being saved at a U2 concert.
We’re talking sex and our deep desires on this episode of the Undone Redone podcast! With the recent hack of cheating website AshleyMadison.com that boasts over 39 million now not-so-anonymous subscribers, it is pretty apparent we need fresh perspective on how to cultivate true intimacy in our relationships. Sex therapist Melea Stephens once again joins Tray and Mel on the show and provides insight and wisdom on how to cultivate a marriage relationship that is mutually satisfying.
Got questions? Email us at email@example.com or leave us a voicemail at www.undoneredone.com. Thanks for listening!
In this episode, Melody steps out of the co-host seat and into the guest seat as Tray interviews her about her new online audio course called Life Beyond Betrayal. Sharing from her personal experience, Melody gives valuable perspective to the woman who is facing this reality and provides a clear path to move forward. For more information on this invaluable resource, go to www.lifebeyondbetrayal.com.
Got questions? Email us at firstname.lastname@example.org or leave us a voicemail at www.undoneredone.com. Thanks for listening!
Singer/songwriter David Upton and music producer Keith Everette Smith join Tray and Mel for episode #67 to talk about their brand new “soundtrack for the recovery journey” entitled Unraveled. David and Keith discuss the genesis of the project and also the background for four of the album’s thirteen tracks: “Unraveled”, “Change”, “I’ll Leave the Light On”, and “Whiskey Soaked Revival”.
David and Keith’s hearts shine through as they openly and vulnerably share their own journey and their passion for the recovery process.
This is a longer episode than usual, but boy are you in for a treat! Pastor, Professor, and Executive Coach Chris McAlister rocks episode #66 with an in-depth discussion on identity, shame, and healthy community. Tune-in and hear Chris describe how to ‘pause our mental mechanism’ and how this is essential to living out of a secure identity. Like what you hear? Please consider giving us a favorable rating on iTunes or Stitcher Radio! Remember…Life is messy. Bring your boots!
Got questions? Email us at email@example.com or leave us a voicemail at www.undoneredone.com. Thanks for listening!
Author Emily Rose Massey joins Tray and Mel for episode #65 to tell her story of healing from a past filled with sexual sin and brokenness. Emily openly and honestly shares about sexual abuse, abandonment, and years spent trying to validate herself through male attention and affection. Her book, Yielded in His Hands: Becoming a Vessel for God’s Glory, is her testimony of God’s relentless pursuit in the midst of a wayward life. Connect with Emily on her blog at www.emilyrosemassey.com.
Got questions? Email us at firstname.lastname@example.org or leave us a voicemail at www.undoneredone.com. Thanks for listening!
In this episode, Tray and Melody discuss the specific ways God is using the epidemic of pornography and sex addiction to lead men and women to a deeper understanding of grace and the gospel…not just stateside…but around the world. This episode features an interview with missionary Tony Boyd, who is using recovery groups as outreach opportunities in Panang, Malaysia.
With the 4th of July coming up this weekend, Tray and Mel dive into the freedom offered by the gospel and the reasons it is sometimes so hard for us to simply live in that freedom. Episode #63 takes a look at powerlessness as the entry-point of the gospel, Paul’s use of the imperative and indicative in his writing, and how the performance treadmill becomes another form of slavery.
If you enjoyed the show, please rate it and write a brief review. That would help tremendously in helping us get the word out! Thanks!
Healthy, authentic community is one of the key ingredients that helps to bring about lasting, long-term change in our lives. In this episode of the Undone Redone podcast, Tray and Mel talk in-depth about how to create this type of authentic culture through Route1520’s Christ-centered recovery solution for churches, called GroupNOW.
Summer is here! That means the kids are out of school and looking forward to fun and exciting summer activities. It also means that as parents, we need to take a moment to think about our strategy around technology for the summer in order to ensure that our children are safe. In this episode of the Undone Redone podcast, Tray and Melody talk briefly about teaching our children about healthy digital citizenship and then dive into 6 or 7 popular apps that can be potentially dangerous for our children.
Please share this episode with your family and friends…especially those who still have children in the home.
Mel and Tray are FINALLY back in the studio! As they remind us on each episode, “Life is Messy…Bring Your Boots”, they openly share the messiness that they have experienced over the past few months that hindered them from consistently getting into the studio to record. Tray and Mel deliberately stepped back from ministry for 2 months in order to re-fresh and re-focus and got to experience a wonderful 4-day marriage intensive in Nashville during their time away. They are now back rested, refreshed, and re-focused and look forward to bringing you fresh new content in the weeks ahead.
Society pays a price when we teach men to be turned on by women in pain. Continuing in our series entitled “Sex. Don’t Settle for Grey”, Tray and Melody welcome Heather Lybrand back to the Messy Boots Studio to discuss ‘Gifts and Counterfeits’. For every good and perfect gift God gives his children, the enemy of our souls offers a counterfeit to keep us from experiencing God’s good gift. Sex and our sexuality is no different. Because sex in a committed, marital relationship is a picture of our union with God through Christ, Satan will do whatever he can to profane this picture and to sell us a cheap substitute. The movie ’50 Shades of Grey’ celebrates a selfish, carnal sexuality that degrades and controls women that does not come close to the intimate, selfless act God intended.
Whether you are planning to watch the ’50 Shades of Grey’ movie or not, we hope you will take the time to listen to this series and at least compare God’s design with what we are being offered by culture. Please consider sharing with your family and friends!
Continuing in our "Sex. Don't Settle for Grey" series, Tray and Melody discuss 'Sexual Atheism' with Undone Redone's Greg Oliver. This interview addresses the growing phenomenon among single Christians who are ignoring clear Biblical standards when it comes to sex and sexuality.
In this episode, Tray and Mel kick off a new series entitled “Sex. There is Nothing Grey About It” in an effort to respond to the upcoming release of the “50 Shades of Grey” movie. Two previous guests on the show, Dawn Hawkins and Therapist Melea Stephens, join Tray and Mel to discuss the link between pornography consumption and sexual exploitation.
Heather Lybrand is joining the Undone Redone team as our new Director of Women’s Ministries! On this episode of Undone Redone, Melody and Tray interview Heather and discuss her own personal ‘undone redone’ story, her passion for the hearts of women, and how she became a Bama fan while growing up in West Virginia! Consider sharing this episode with your family and friends!
The Undone Redone ministry team is growing! In this episode, Tray and Melody interview Greg and Stacey Oliver who are joining the team at Undone Redone and will help grow and expand our Christ-Centered recovery groups.
In this episode, you will hear the Oliver's own personal "undone redone" story as well as how God is using them to speak into the brokenness of others. Consider telling your family and friends about this story of hope!
After taking a number of months off, Melody and Traylor are back in the studio! In this episode, Traylor and Melody update the Undone Redone listeners on all of the exciting things going on with the ministry and lay out the ministry plans for the new year!
Stephen Bunn and Rosson Anderson of College Golf Fellowship join Traylor in the studio to both share their undone redone stories and how God is using them on the PGA Tour and in the lives of college golfers.
According to Wikipedia, "Shit Happens" is a common slang phrase, used as a simple existential observation that life is full of unpredictable events. The phrase is an acknowledgment that bad things happen to people for no particular reason. In this week's episode, Melody and Tray share their recent "shit happens" experience with a broken sewer pipe that caused raw sewage to back up into their home on Father's Day. Enjoy the story that we all can relate to in one way or another.
Undone Redone again welcomes Shelley Hendrix and Rebecca Halton back to the show to provide valuable insight and much needed perspective on an upcoming Hollywood movie called The Other Woman. Rebecca has been the other woman and Shelley was betrayed by the other woman and together they share from their own stories that redemption is much better than revenge. Please leave a review of the show on iTunes and Stitcher Radio!
The 50th episode of the Undone Redone podcast features singer/songwriter and worship leader David Hampton. In this interview, David candidly discusses his wife’s illness and death and the alcohol that he ran to in order to numb and ultimately escape his pain. In David’s redemptive story, we see clearly that God pursues us even when we are running in the opposite direction. This interview also features David’s heartfelt ballad ‘All That I Desire’ from his EP entitled “Split the Sky”.
This week’s Undone Redone podcast features a message entitled Dropping the Fig Leaves that Tray and Melody shared at Journey Church in Prattville, AL. Dropping the Fig Leaves takes an honest look at the first relationship right after the Fall and examines the reasons we hide from ourselves and our spouse and points to the only solution for once again living ‘naked and unashamed’. Please consider sharing Undone Redone with your family and friends and make sure to connect with us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/undoneredone.
Author, Speaker, and Radio Host Shannon Ethridge joins Tray and Melody on this week’s Undone Redone podcast to discuss her brand new book, The Passion Principles. The Passion Principles answers 40 of the most intimate questions about sex, including “Will there be sex in heaven?” Head over to our Facebook page at www.facebook.com/undoneredone where we will be giving away a FREE copy of this great resource.
Michael John Cusick, President and Founder of Restoring the Soul and author of Surfing for God: Discovering the Divine Desire Beneath Sexual Struggle, joins Tray and Melody again on the show to discuss what it looks like to live life out of the deep desires of our heart. It is easy to conclude that we need to reign in our desires and our passions in order to live a more righteous life, but Michael shares how any attempt to squelch and kill our deep desires only sends our hearts underground and never leads to the lasting change we desire.
Happy New Year! We’re a bit tardy in getting up our first show of 2014, but better late than never! In today’s episode, we talk New Year’s resolutions and grace and share a lesson from nature that teaches us we gain strength from the struggle.
In this last episode of 2013, Tray and Melody discuss Disney's Frozen, the genealogy of Christ recorded in Matthew 1 and the messiness surrounding Jesus' birth in a feeding trough surrounded by animals and the stench of manure. We often attempt to sanitize Christmas and other parts of the Christian life, but God wants to join us in the mess rather than pretend it isn't there. Merry Christmas and Season's Greetings from Tray and Mel! We look forward to bringing many exciting guests to the show in 2014!
Tuesday, December 10th is the National Day of Prayer to Strengthen the Fight Against Pornography and, to help bring awareness to this event and the organization behind it, Tray and Mel interview Morality in Media’s Executive Director, Dawn Hawkins. Dawn discusses Morality in Media’s fight at the national level to get obscenity and decency laws enforced and shows how being lax with these laws has helped to usher in an explosion of pornographic material in the last decade. Tune into this informative episode and please consider sharing it with your pastor or priest.
Tray and Mel conclude the Perfectly Imperfect Marriage series on this week’s Undone Redone podcast. Tray and Mel talk Thanksgiving, the epic Iron Bowl, and unpack how God has used this series in their own marriage over the past two months. Please consider sharing this marriage series with your family and friends!
Nothing causes conflict in marriage more than money. Episode #42 of the Undone Redone podcast features financial advisor Harry Pearson who continues our Perfectly Imperfect Marriage series by discussing basic money management and how to live life "open-handed."
Pastor Bob Flayhart joins us again for episode #41 of the Undone Redone podcast as we continue our series on marriage called Perfectly Imperfect Marriage. Bob, who performed the ceremony for Tray and Melody's second wedding, discusses how marriage is an instrument in the sanctification process and how God uses our spouse to expose our own brokenness.
Sex is a gift from God, but, unfortunately, the Church has been silent historically on the topic. When it is discussed in Christian circles, it is most often in the context of activity to be avoided before marriage. But what about after we say “I do”? Are we supposed to automatically flip a switch and start enjoying something that we have been avoiding for years? Birmingham sex therapist Melea Stephens joins us for this episode of the Undone Redone podcast and takes an honest look at God’s design for sex and how misperceptions can lead to pain and heartache within a marriage. Melea shares the Biblical concept of ‘yada’ and how it differs greatly from what our culture tells us about satisfying sex. Grab a cup of coffee with your spouse and listen as Melea shares hidden truths that can help strengthen the sexual intimacy in your marriage.
Trust is a fundamental principle of life and the foundation of every relationship. When trust is broken in a marriage, the effects can be devastating and it can be very difficult for the relationship to recover. In this episode of the Undone Redone podcast, therapist Adam Calvert provides an in-depth look at the importance of trust in marriage and lays out a process for rebuilding trust when it has been broken. Even if your marriage has not experienced deep betrayal, this foundational teaching on trust can still help and strengthen the relationship with your spouse.
Author and speaker John Lynch joins us again on Undone Redone as makes his contribution to our Perfectly Imperfect Marriage series. In this episode, John gives us a peek into his marriage and what it looks like to give our spouse permission to love us. This teaching is a unique and much needed perspective on marriage. Don't miss it!
Undone Redone’s Perfectly Imperfect Marriage series continues with Stephen and Shelley Hendrix! The Hendrix’s discuss vulnerability, pre-marital counseling, healthy conflict, staying engaged, and becoming a safe haven for our spouse. This honest dialogue will provide hope and encouragement no matter what season your marriage is in.
Brian and Jenni Clayville's marriage survived a two-year affair. They share their painful yet redemptive story of hope and healing on this week's Undone Redone podcast as part of our Perfectly Imperfect Marriage series. If you or someone you know have experienced the pain of infidelity, tune in and learn from the Clayville's experience.
Author and therapist Dr. Gordon Bals kicks of our “Perfectly Imperfect Marriage” series with an honest an refreshing look at the hard work and difficulty of marriage that is designed to point us toward Someone bigger. Please share this interview with family and friends who need hope and encouragement in their marriages.
This episode of Undone Redone kicks off a series of shows that we are calling Perfectly Imperfect Marriage. Guests in this marriage series will include John Lynch, Gordon Baals, Bob Flayhart, Stephen and Shelley Hendrix, Brian and Jenni Clayville, and Darren and April Mabrey. If you have family or friends who are having challenges in their marriage and need some hope and encouragement, consider sharing the Undone Redone podcast with them via email or Facebook.
Traylor and Melody share their messy, yet redemptive story of marriage, divorce, and reconciliation in this episode of the Undone Redone podcast. Divorced for six years because of Traylor's addiction to pornography and sex, Traylor and Melody openly and honestly share their painful journey that led to their miraculous re-marriage in 2008. Consider sharing this incredible story of hope with anyone that you know who is struggling in their marriage.
Adventurer, author, blogger, and Life Coach Michael Warden joins Tray and Mel on this week’s Undone Redone podcast. Michael openly shares his traumatic story of childhood sexual abuse and his painful yet redemptive path toward healing and genuine freedom in Christ. Michael also gives details about the BraveHeart Intensive for men and the Destiny Project for women…intensive 4-day events designed to help men and women discover and live out of their true identities in Christ. Tune-in and be encouraged by this courageous man’s path to true freedom.
This week’s guest on Undone Redone is pastoral counselor and spiritual director Nathan Shattuck who practices in Atlanta and specializes in working with individuals dealing with sexual addiction as well as couples in crisis. In this episode, Nathan provides an in-depth overview of his insightful lecture series entitled “Impersonating Ourselves: The Truth About the False Self”.
Episode #29 of Undone Redone features Birmingham artist Gina Hurry. Gina shares her passion about the creative process and gives us a peek into her conviction that beauty changes things and stirs up hope by reminding us that this is not our home. Gina, along with a number of other artists, is attempting to help with racial reconciliation in Birmingham with a gathering of art that they are calling “50 Years of Hopes & Dreams”. Painters, sculptors, illustrators, and photographers are submitting pieces for this show inspired by 3 words: forgiveness, reconciliation, and hope. Tune in now and listen as Gina shares how she and other artists are daily creating beauty out of a mess.
For most of us, our sin and secrets will never make the 6:00 evening news, but David Graves knows firsthand what that experience is like. Indicted for taking money from the charity that he served as a board member, David shares how he developed a greater sense of God’s grace as his sin was brought into the light. Grace is often a hard concept to get our arms around, especially when it involves giving grace to those that willingly cause life to break instead of being an innocent victim. Tune in to episode #28 of the Undone Redone podcast and be challenged by David’s engaging transparency.
With the kickoff to the 2013 college football season just around the corner, Tray and Melody welcome former Alabama All-American and current Alabama Crimson Tide football chaplain Jeremiah Castille and his wife Jean to the show. Jeremiah and Jean candidly discuss intentional parenting, staying connected in marriage, and a few rarely (if ever) heard Bear Bryant stories. Don't miss this fun and informative episode of Undone Redone!
Episode #26 of the Undone Redone podcast features an interview with author and speaker Crystal Renaud who shares her 8 year battle with pornography and sex addiction and the unique shame that women who struggle in this area experience.
Welcome to episode #25 of Undone Redone! In this episode, Traylor and Melody talk with Certified Sex Addiction Therapist Becky Whitson about sex addiction and her own experience as a woman married to a recovering sex addict. A common cultural misconception about sex addiction is that sex addiction and pedophilia go hand-in-hand and Becky dispels this myth among many others.
Episode #24 of the Undone Redone podcast features authors Shelley Hendrix and Rebecca Halton who together make up Team Redeemed. Rebecca was the “other woman,” in an adulterous relationship with a married man and Shelley was the wounded wife whose first husband left her for his “other woman”. Rebecca shares her grace story in a book entitled Words from the Other Woman: The True Account of a Redeemed Adulteress and Shelley’s book, as featured on episode #12 of Undone Redone, is Why Can’t We Just Get Along. Tune in as Shelley and Rebecca share the hope and redemption they have experienced after wading through some very messy circumstances.
Episode #23 of Undone Redone features an interview with author, speaker, and life coach Elizabeth Turnage. Elizabeth openly shares her journey where, as she describes it, "God graciously allowed me to wear myself out." This is one grace awakening you don't want to miss!
Episode #22 of the Undone Redone podcast features an interview with author and speaker Serena Woods who blogs regularly at www.graceisforsinners.com. Serena's grace awakening has been gut-wrenchingly painful, but has left her with a deep insight into the Father's heart. Serena shares openly and honestly about being abandoned by her mother, her moral failure, and the painful rejection she experienced from her church. She understands grace because she has experienced grace in a profound way.
Last week's landmark decisions from the Supreme Court relating to same-sex marriage and the Defense of Marriage Act brought this debate to the forefront of the news. But traditionally the Church has done a poor job of standing for truth while at the same time being gracious and loving. On today’s show, Traylor and Melody interview therapist Thaddeus Heffner who talks about unwanted same-sex attraction and how the Church can inadvertently compound the confusion for those who are struggling. This debate is not going away and we must be prepared to engage this dialogue in healthy and not harmful ways.
Tray and Melody interview worship leader and former rocker Marc Phillips on this episode of the Undone Redone podcast. Marc has a powerful testimony of God's grace and faithfulness through rebellion and rock and roll and the miraculous ways in which He moved during his battle with throat cancer. Don't miss this powerful, messy, grace story!
The kids are out of school for the summer and it is vitally important that the technology safety measures for our homes are up-to-date and working properly. In this episode of Undone Redone, Traylor and Melody discuss 5 tips for helping to ensure summer is safe for our children. Covering formal technology game plans, Internet filtering software, and the importance of establishing an ongoing dialogue, if you have children, this is one show you don't want to miss.
In this week’s episode, Traylor and Melody interview Michael John Cusick, President and Founder of Restoring the Soul and author of Surfing for God: Discovering the Divine Desire Beneath Sexual Struggle. Michael, a recovering sex addict and licensed professional counselor, uses Scripture along with examples from his own life to demonstrate how the pursuit of pleasure through sex is actually a search for our heart’s deepest desire.
Undone Redone is a weekly podcast by Traylor and Melody Lovvorn that courageously steps into the brokenness and messiness of life and gazes through the lens of God’s wonderfully scandalous grace.
In this episode, Melody and Tray dive into a frank discussion about the relationship between grace and obedience and how we balance the two. God’s standard of perfection means we have to go in one of two directions…either adopting a belief system that includes a hierarchy of sin that categorizes sin as “big sin” and “little sin” or realizing that we can’t meet the standard on our own and that our only hope is His grace. If you have a question or comment, we’d love to hear from you through our Facebook page at www.facebook.com/undoneredone. Leave us a voicemail and we will get back with you.
Episode #15 of Undone Redone features author, speaker, and pastor John Lynch of Truefaced Ministries. John is the author of The Cure: What If God Isn’t Who You Think He Is and Neither Are You and was the teaching pastor at Open Door Fellowship in Phoenix, Arizona for 27 years. In this powerful episode, John discusses The Cure, grace, the masks we hide behind, and why working on our sin will never resolve it.
Undone Redone is a weekly podcast by Traylor and Melody Lovvorn that courageously steps into the brokenness and messiness of life and gazes through the lens of God’s wonderfully scandalous grace.
Due to the epidemic of sexual sin within our culture, more and more individuals are facing the painful experience of discovering their spouse’s secrets of sexual sin. While the church knows how to minister when there is illness and death, individuals can often find themselves very alone when facing the reality of sexual sin within marriage. In this episode, Tray and Melody pull from their own experience and offer 5 things every woman should know when dealing with her husband’s sexual sin.
In this episode of Undone Redone, Traylor and Melody interview Nate Larkin, author of the book Samson and the Pirate Monks, founder of The Samson Society, and host of The Pirate Monk Radio Show. Nate, a former minister and recovering sex addict, openly shares about grace, rebuilding trust, and the freedom to live life without masks.
In this episode of Undone Redone, Traylor and Melody interview author and speaker Shelley Hendrix of Atlanta’s Church4Chicks ministry. Shelley shares her own merciful undoing and how God removed her masks of self sufficiency and religious duty. She also talks about her exciting new book from Harvest House Publishing entitled “Why Can’t We Just Get Along?”
Author and speaker Brennan Manning, the original Ragamuffin, passed away Friday, April 12th after a long illness and is now dancing in the presence of his Abba. In this episode of Undone Redone, Traylor and Melody reflect on his life and the impact that his message of grace has had on their lives and many others.
In this episode, Melody and Traylor discuss the ever changing technological landscape and how to stay engaged and intentional when it comes to training our children how to use technology responsibly.
Undone Redone is a weekly podcast by Traylor and Melody Lovvorn that courageously steps into the brokenness and messiness of life and gazes through the lens of God’s wonderfully scandalous grace.
Melody shares her journey from a performance paradigm to a deeper understanding of grace and the Gospel by unpacking what she discovered about herself and her deep heart motivations. This discovery allowed her to step off of the performance treadmill and to rest as His beloved daughter.
This week Traylor and Melody discuss Authentic manhood and true, masculine strength. Many Christian men, without a clear picture of what a authentic manhood looks like, have opted for the safe, passive, nice guy role and have abandoned their masculine strength. This episode is a call for all men to step into the unique story that God is writing for them…a role that will require strength under control.
Undone Redone's 3rd annual Open Your Purse gala will be held virtually this year! Join us this Thursday night, October 22nd! Our online auction will begin at 5 PM CST and the livestream pre-show starts at 6 PM CST with the program starting at 6:30 PM CST.
We have over 75 purses from designers like TopShop, Kate Spade, Coach, Furla, Chloe, Rag & Bone, Prada, Alexander Wang, Stuart Weitzman, Stella McCartney, & many others!
Go to openyourpursegala.com for all of the event information, including the link to download the Handbid app, a sneak peek at some of the purses that will be auctioned-off, the livestream link, our instafeed on Instagram, and much, much more!
The conversation about racial injustice in America is raging strong right now and I personally want to do a better job of listening. In so doing, I had the privilege of sitting down to talk racism with former Alabama All-American and NFL standout Jeremiah Castille and his sons Simeon and Caleb, who both also played at the University of Alabama. Simeon was an All-SEC defensive back who also played in the NFL and Caleb played defensive back and left the Capstone with 2 national championship rings and currently is an actor living in Los Angeles.
Jeremiah, Simeon, and Caleb graciously answered my questions as I sought to challenge my understanding of racial relations based on my own cultural upbringing. They helped me to understand that, no matter how hard I try, I will never fully understand what black people in America deal with…often on a daily basis. As Jeremiah eloquently points out in this conversation, at the end of the day, this is a heart issue and only Jesus can change the human heart. It is my prayer that my white evangelical friends will join me in becoming better listeners during this critical conversation.
Here are some of my key takeaways from this conversation on racism with Jeremiah, Simeon, and Caleb:
- We need to see need, not color.
- As a white individual, I will never fully understand the experiences of my black friends and colleagues.
- We must be more intentional in having conversations with people who grew up with a different cultural understanding of the world. Diversity brings richness to our lives.
- The Church must lead the way in bringing about racial reconciliation in our country.
Tech expert Scotty Loveless joins Tray and Melody on this episode of the show to discuss the importance of leading with vulnerability when it comes to parenting our children. Scotty gives practical advice on protecting children from some of the harmful effects of technology as well as reasons it is never a good idea to appear to have it all together with our kids.
Connect with Scotty at http://www.blueowldigital.com.
Continuing with our series of interviews from the Set Free Summit, Troy Haas, Executive Director of HopeQuest, joins Tray and Melody on this week’s episode. Troy tells his redemptive story and discusses many of the great programs offered by HopeQuest.
If you enjoyed the show, please consider giving us a rating & review on iTunes and/or Stitcher Radio!
This week’s episode of the Undone Redone podcast features Mark Whitacre, an Ivy League PhD who became the highest-ranked executive of any Fortune 500 company to become a whistleblower in US history. Mark worked as an undercover informant for the FBI for 3 long years and is responsible for exposing the Archer Daniels Midland price-fixing scandal in the early ’90’s. His experience as an FBI informant was the inspiration behind the 2009 movie “The Informant”, featuring Matt Damon. Ultimately serving almost 9 years in prison for corporate fraud, Mark refers to his time in prison as some of the most productive years of his life. Don’t miss this made-for-Hollywood story as Mark openly shares how he was blinded by greed, power, and possessions and what it took for God to take him to the end of himself.