Pre-Shift

Vegas is back, hittin' it hard & early! Jonesy is back and has to play moneyball, after his easiest St. Patty's Day ever. Thomas found his brother's doppelganger and charges the entire Midwest for parking. Frank 'The Every Friend' cleans up puke and hates fries from [codeword: roadhouse]. 2 Karens, 1 Creep, Stagedoor shooting, volcano hot dogs and the award for douchebag of the year goes to...

It's the bar-tending Super-Bowl, St. Patrick's Day! Jonesy is too afraid to even open his laptop. Thomas prints his own $5 bills and tells us his favorite O'Malley story. Frank judges a kissing contest while getting stuck in an elevator. Karen wants a free chair, toilet etiquette and bartender breast milk. Everybody looks before they flush!

It's starting to smell like fresh, ripe bum p*** again! Jonesy opens for Papa Roach and throws some dice. Thomas calls out and meets his brother's new neighbors. Frank under cuts the market and always needs more eggs. Fighting co-workers, Karen assaults the pilot, man climbs the Eiffel Tower and the calm before the storm...

Happy Birthday Justin Bieber! Jonesy asks for an itemized receipt and doesn't know how to work a computer. Thomas is the getaway driver and brings his baby to the bar. Frank's emergency contact and an IV of lard. Group date Karen, 4th Ave underpass, fake kidnapping and philosophical drunk men.

So 2 Alvarado's walk into a gym... Jonesy 'The Legend' is in studio and lies about his age. Thomas has to mop the freezer as he describes his training day at Strat. Frankie (AyCE) eats damn good brisket and loves Nico's 3000. Closing time Karen, cocaine frosted flakes, fast food settlement offer and the ultimate bartender perk.

Good times...don't miss it at all. Jonesy is ovulating and floods O'malleys with a tear in his eye. Thomas is the Laughlin Creep and parties with J Stew. Franks prays during lap dances while he aims low. Karen's college fund, Alabama review, underwear masks and fake IDs.

Chicken wing twerking! Tara dishes on her regulars, pool stories and Gary 'The Perfect Guest.' Jonesy loves to sing Aladdin but loses his internet connection. Thomas shaves his head and goes on a first date with Cam. Frank finally wins a bet and still has to beg for his Christmas bonus. Karen needs to settle, streaking at Circa and great parenting at The Linq.

Once upon a time, there was 2 fat guys sprinting... Jonesy makes a blue bloody mary just in time to order male yoga pants online. Thomas is growing his hair out and channels his inner Megamind. Frank doesn't delegate and gives us his Superbowl bets and food. Karen hates lemonade, Creep orders a slice of pizza and a drunk guy throws piss. Beware of the Promenade Rat!

It's raining men! Jonesy is double fisting and finally bought a mic. Thomas gets a haircut from a one-handed barber and has to share a bed with his brother. Frank's meal plan will get you certified Husky in no time with damn good bleu cheese. We talk Tucson violence, best gas station food, alcohol delivery and Karen misses McDonald's breakfast cutoff.

Another week, another flock of insanity. Jonesy wishes Frank good luck and tries to guess what he ate. Thomas watches 'Aliens', drinks on the job and avoids getting fired. Frank pukes in the bathtub, passes out, clogs the drain and nearly drowns. Karen has a problem with her Tesla, $5 date night and urinal cameras. What more do you need?

The stimulus has arrived along with a Spongebob 150 teenage Battle Royale at Meadows Mall. Jonesy has to get his dog food delivered, after getting his hands dirty at work. Thomas rats on his brother again and orders 10 Crown Royals before happy hour ends. Frank's favorite bathroom stall is out of order so he decides to pay a lost bet in quarters. $600 at Walmart, Karen's Christmas and the Sunset Park Gator are here for free samples!

New year, still fat! Jonesy goes to whole foods, in $250 jeans and receives some cosmic justice. Thomas grew a mustache to impress a boy toy at work. Frank brings his own breast milk after a long week of no hot dog lady and no happy hour. Karen tries to return pants, dine and dash shooting and bartending in Tombstone. What would happen to Frank on his tippy toes?!

We crossed the flaccid finish line. Jonesy brags about Christmas presents, researches poor people and gets to finally celebrate the new year. Thomas runs into a barbed wire fence after drinking keg beer at a quinceanera. Frank 'The Squatter' splits his pants turtling with Tig and only finds heartbreak in the drive-thru. Karen dials 911, $5 candy bars and drinking in high school. Happy New Year scumbags!

Cheers to Last Christmas! Jonesy is the Grinch and tells Frank how fatter than normal he looks. Thomas the Creepy Elf stomps on his brother's toes and 'helps' him change a car battery. Frank hates Christmas albums so he decided to sing about it. Baby chain smoker, 12 year old DJ, fat kid drops fries and man threatens cook with shotgun are all on Santa's list. Happy Festivus!

What's the password? Jonesy aka 'Man of War' is grounded for staying up past curfew but that won't stop him from clogging Scott's toilet. Video surfaces of Thomas coaching youth sports while he gives us an update on New York rats and the rocket man. Frank goes to the 99¢ store and apparently loves Nick Lachey but what really destroyed his Olympic career? We talk lot lizards, megachurch strip clubs and Romosexuals! What more do you need?

Just make sure you give Vontaze Burfict good directions. Jonesy stays up part curfew, forgets to order beer gas and makes a vodka-cranberry with tequila? Thomas complains about having to celebrate Frank's birthday and how he orders too much food. Frank is 38 years young but that won't stop him from rubbing mashed potatoes on his head. We also have a Karen, Frank's Rule of 3 and cheesecake or pie?

We're still here! Jonesy has an 8 o'clock curfew and mentions Bro-Cha-Cho. Thomas hears about underground strip clubs, talks about an old friend punching a cabbie and relieves himself outside of a casino. Frank goes to Panda Express and gets yelled at, considers being a fast food coyote, and gets excited about the McRib! We also talk Tyson/Jones, copper thieves and Karen eats a cupcake!

Cheers to the end of the world! Frank gives us his favorite Thanksgiving dishes and his dancing leads to an injury. Jones is back with his dialup internet connection to tell us all about voluntary curfew. Thomas does his best Eddie Munster impression while giving his Creepy Hot Spots. We discuss New Normal, bar hopping at 7am, Alvarado family stories and introduce Irving. DON'T DRINK HAND SANITIZER! 

Frank had a rough week that includes judgment at Walmart and someone forgetting the sauce! We reminisce on our first family computer and swap pee pee and poo poo stories. T-Mo and Branson stop by for 50¢ beer Thursdays and she's back... Karens on a Plane 2 : No Pants!

It's over and now things can get back to the New Normal with violence at Circus Circus. Frank gets help from a stripper, lies in the drive-thru and reviews some tacos. Jonesy is alive and has a casting couch.  We share stories about O'Sheas and what happened in June 2016. Karen has returned in the form of a racist Chad. WASH YOUR DAMN HANDS... or don't.

The forgotten hot dog. The introduction of Benjamin Sheedy as he marks cards with mustard and goes to Mexico to place a sports bet. We recap a boring Halloween weekend with a walk out and split checks. Frank visits Pittsburgh Mike at The Edge of Town. The Creep returns and asks for socks and shoes.

The life of a bar manager. Frank goes to Beer Park and makes a friend. The drive from Benson to Las Vegas gets interesting. Bar Creeps asking for used socks and shoes. Cheap Bar Owners suck. Happy Halloween boys and girls!

Drunk Sprints
Ellis Island
2¢ Beer Night
Bacon Bar
Drinking at work
Stealing from work

Viva Las Violence
Karen's on a Plane
Casino Hot Dogs
Bar Regulars
Creepy Frank
Bobby D from Jamaica

1st Hour w/ Pat and J-Mo
Office Antics
Lethal Force
Tweaker Boob
Public Masturbation
2nd Hour w/ Lisa and Stevie
Creepy Bathwater

Hooker Headshot 
Anti-Covid Creep 
KFC Karen 
Top 5 Appetizers 
Sneezy Shit Standoff 

Las Vegas Raiders
Stall Etiquette
Drunk Women Shits
Nixon
Zombie Karen
Our "BIG" News

Nat Geo Tit
The Creepy Standard
Types of NFL fans
Stevie from Gainesville
65 year old Karen

Parking Lot Twerk
Baby Crossfit
Frank's Green Onions
Hated Bar Drinks
Turd-Coloured Karen
Offended Creep
Working Grave
NFL Predictions

Frank is Hungover
Hooters w/ J-Stew
Drive-Thru Karen
Creepy Photographer
Cheers to The Black Panther

Cheers
Fremont Stories
Creepy Grandma
Peachy Karen

Covid Chronicles
Where was Frank really?
Creepy Fraternity
Karen goes potty
ID check in Sydney
Frank meets an escort

Sports Talk
Karen's Cone
Corey vs Mirko (Review)
Graveyard Creep
Frank's Toes and Tats

Dom Perignon
Gary in New York
Brotherly Love
Cross-legged Creep
39¢ Karen

Drive Thru Strip Club
Kevin from Texas
Creepy Scars
Karen needs a Cherry

Top 5 Drunk Fast Food Items
McKaren
I.D. Please
Creepy Mom
Fabulous Rims

The inauguration of Pre-Shift.