Kagro in the Morning

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David Waldman brings us the latest KITM news for Thursday. Greg Dworkin is first up with sports analysis: UConn beats Syracuse in the NCAA Tournament second-round game, setting up a meeting with Iowa in Sweet 16. Syracuse were worthy opponents. Next up is Joe Biden’s first press conference! Joe has some experience with journalists. ABC’s Bob Clark, who scored Joe Biden’s first interview, won’t be attending today’s press scrum, leaving the hard-hitting thoughtful journalism to others. The president should be fact checking the press corps. And, oh, Kim Jong-Un has a question in the back row…

What’s happening with that boat over there? This isn’t a job for Joe to worry about… This is a job for — a bulldozer or two, or maybe a very hard-working, spunky towboat. What’s happening with COVID? There’s absolutely great progress on vaccinations, but Mr. Biden’s encouragement to take vaccines can only go so far. What’s happening on the border? Joe is a nice guy, but that isn’t why people are heading our way. Anyone with questions can now direct them to Vice President Kamala Harris. What’s happening with gun control? What is happening with gun control?

It’s not just Joe and Kamala, Democrats are being known as a pretty nice party. Republicans aren’t. It’s simply not good business to deal with jerks. It turns out that supporting mass murder isn’t good politics. They sure do pray a lot, though. Think you’ll see Donald in the pews or on the links on Easter? Are golf courses closed on Easter? Cindy Hyde-Smith doesn’t want to tempt God’s wrath by allowing Blacks to vote on Sunday. Only He, and she, really know what to do on the Sabbath… whatever day that is. Always go to Republicans for your moral guidance —  Pepé Le Pew! Hello! Voter suppression is now their moral stand.

Donald Trump wanted Sidney Powell as his Special Counsel. Sidney has found it necessary to explain to a judge how all good slander and libel requires “lying” about things to really work.

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David Waldman makes it official, throwing out the first bag of mulch, and his back, to kick off the spring season. Greg Dworkin sails in with his jumbo raft o’stories. It’s summarizing time!

Democrats that like to worry, worry that HR 1 might hurt democracy. Republicans worry that HR 1 might hurt Republicans, and make them all “former guys”. Scaredy Dems want to go back to baby steps, but big plans can carry the many needed side deals required for passage.

Republican voters believe that fascism might be the only thing left that can save democracy. Senator Ron Johnson helps them reach that very conclusion by destroying as much government as he can get his hands on. Other Republicans throw in when and where they can. What they can’t destroy, they will merely keep others from participating in. The 1/6 commission, being made up of a bipartisan delegation of Democrats and criminals, is having a hard time getting off the ground. Conservatives morality and empathy are often directly linked to their own personal pain, and it’s just not nice to wish they all reach that pain, forthwith. Idaho Covid protesters burn masks in front of their capitol, 14 days later, their capitol is shut down from Covid. 14 days might be too long to expect much of them to hold a complex thought, however.

The US gets an uptick in border apprehensions. Good luck finding a Republican that can remember 2019, let alone the George W. Bush administration. Reporter’s memories are even shorter. The prior administration's policies serially violated human rights and were profoundly cruel, which is precisely what John Cornyn loved most about them.

As for COVID-19, it’s still here. AstraZeneca’s vaccine is pretty good, and that’s good enough, especially compared to no vaccine. Johnson & Johnson’s single-shot vaccine was supposed to reach people quicker, but it is going to tougher locations, with tougher people to get through to. Meanwhile, EU nations spent too much time negotiating and positioning and not enough poking.

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TGIF! At least, for those of you who are “Friday observant”, which thanks to Joe, the flock welcomes even more each week.

Atlanta police aren’t commenting on whether the killing of eight people—six of them Asian or Asian American women—was a hate crime. The spokesman for the Georgia Sheriff's Office isn’t commenting on anything anymore. Was the shooter just trying to wean himself from being enticed by women? Ex-evangelical Chrissy Stroop asks us to not discount evangelicalism as a factor in this latest masacre.

Have you noticed? All of a sudden, there are so many filibuster experts! Of course, we at KITM have the OG, David Waldman, who today welcomes his special guest filibuster reform advocate from Fix Our Senate, Eli Zupnick, to describe just how close we are to actually fixing the Senate.

“Liberal” isn’t a dirty word, and neither is “rich” for that matter. Liberal Thinking, aka Rich, is proud to be both, and presents his final two episodes of the 6 part series, Busting the Filibuster, for All Daily Kos Progressives, and listeners of KITM. Episode 5 proposes the House-like allocation of floor time for debate based on agreed criteria. It could prove a challenge to enforce with some of the more cagey and uhm, willful Senators, however. Episode 6 hits upon ways to move Senators towards filibuster reform. David, who you know has kind of been there, done that, will attest to the difficulty of this.

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David Waldman and Greg Dworkin deliver the good news — Joe Biden really is here, the former guy isn’t, and COVID hasn’t canceled the brackets.

Is the worst over for the COVID-19 pandemic? Most Americans believe it is. Experts urge caution with 15 states increasing their cases by 10 to 25 percent. It has been a little while since some Americans really listened to experts, however. Sometimes it is because actual experts aren’t correct, or certain fully 100 percent of the time. Sometimes, some people are just boneheads. With Donald out, the reigning bonehead is Brazil’s President Jair Bolsonaro, who incubates vicious new COVID variants for export. Meanwhile, the Biden administration is on track to perhaps start exporting vaccines, as we will soon have more shots than people (Although that doesn’t count the non-people also in line.).

President Biden is making government great again. Joe Biden’s approval on pandemic handling is about the reverse of Donald Trump’s approval as president. If Trumpers don't want stimmies, and not a single one of their representatives voted for them, how about we keep them and split’em up with each other? In exchange, they keep Pepe Le Pew (and we keep Cardi B).

Even evangelicals are losing their faith in white superiority/victimhood. They’re sticking with misogyny for the time being. Beth Moore was a hit with evangelical women until she started finding fault with evangelical men, and now she’s cancelled.

The Biden administration intends to keep building back better, by relieving child poverty, not building border walls. This makes our friends across the aisle irate, and uncooperative... they say. Rich, aka Liberal Thinking, suggests Republicans put up or shut up in his latest audio correspondence. Joe Biden would probably concur. 

Republicans might not have the filibuster forever, but they’ll always have racism. Bob Menendez might be no angel, but he can still call out Ron Johnson. Democrats are seeing and standing with Asian Americans today, but as Asian Americans will tell you, this all didn’t start yesterday.

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David Waldman and Greg Dworkin wore green and attempted to drive the snakes from KITM World Headquarters this morning, but that’s trickier than you’d guess.

Robert Aaron Long had a bad day yesterday, entering three Atlanta Georgia spas and killing 8 people, most of them Asian women, at least half of them Korean. Who did he really hate? Asians? Women? Everyone? We probably won’t need to speculate much further, as Long was treated as gently as any young white male neckbeard should expect, and will probably snag an exclusive prime-time interview by next week to plug his gofundme.

Joe Biden finally will hold his first news conference in 48 years! No, Biden’s had a few in the past, but Joe still must act quickly, as a news-starved nation reaches out to him for their latest Megan Markle take. President Biden actually does talk to the press. We now know that his dog Major is a good boy, Andrew Cuomo might be a bad boy, Vladimir Putin is a very bad boy, and the filibuster is trash.

Republicans who think the Chamber of Commerce is “woke” and Marjorie Taylor Green is being politicized, promise to destroy democracy, if their prime tool to destroy the democracy, the filibuster, is threatened. It is time once again for our regularly scheduled Republican Constitutional/economic disaster while Joe plans to pass the hat and pay the bills. Expect Republicans to again let loose their dick army, loaded with the same talking points from 1993, 1965, and 1935. Meanwhile, Wall Street learns to forgive and forget Republican treasonists.

The White House is set to unveil a wide-reaching, billion-dollar campaign aimed at convincing every American to get vaccinated. Boneheads will remain a challenge, and especially dislike being called boneheads. Donald Trump never said he wanted Republicans to die from COVID-19, by the way. The Catholic church also didn’t say the Johnson & Johnson vaccine shouldn’t be accepted, they would just prefer you try all the other vaccines first. China shows up with a brand new vaccine. Moderna is testing theirs with young kids. Too late for the Brazilian Juma people.

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A couple of things for your consideration today.

Have you ever wondered, how did the FBI investigate accusations of sexual assault by Christine Blasey Ford against Brett Kavanaugh without ever interviewing either Ford or Kavanaugh? Well, so has Senator Sheldon Whitehouse. Mr. Whitehouse has requested that our new Attorney General, Merrick Garland, bring his attention to just that question.

Then there’s our big bête noire around here: The Filibuster. This Jim Crow relic was a useful tool of racists, but so was Strom Thurmond, and you don’t see him around anymore. Finally, the time is now for filibuster reform. Senate Democrats have one choice: Save democracy or save the filibuster. Republicans in turn vow to save the filibuster or destroy democracy. Time is running out to use the Congressional Review Act to roll back any of Donald Trump’s rollbacks. Soon there will be no room left on the fence for even Joe Manchin.

You tune into KITM to hear liberal thinking, and it turns out that Liberal Thinking personified, aka, Rich, has recorded some ideas on how to bust the filibuster. David Waldman and Joan McCarter consider the carrots and sticks available to move things along, from tactical carrots to the nuclear stick, and glean as much as possible from history, from the ploys of Dick Nixon to the grand strategies of Gold and Dupta, to the debate of whether the Senate is a constant when it is constantly being renewed.

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Beware the Ides of March, etc. What, David Waldman and Greg Dworkin worry? Never! They’re secure in the knowledge… and if you had as much knowledge as they do, you’d feel pretty good too:

No one should tolerate anyone that behaves like Donald Trump, even if he’s competent and Democratic. Oh wait, Andrew Cuomo is incompetent also, along with being a sexist, sleazy, thug. Ah, but he did pay many TV salaries, for a while, didn’t he? Just like Donald used to. Trump was the worst in every way, but just doesn’t feed his hosts or his parasites the way he used to. The media sure aren’t bellying up to the same feast with Joe Biden, and Joe is smart to make sure that they never do.

No wonder some Americans don’t trust government and the media… or anybody. How will the Biden administration convince the pocket of people who imagine themselves characters in “The Walking Dead” to take a vaccine in order to serve a greater good when they just don’t believe in greater goods? The people demanding evidence are also those most resistant to facts.

Ron Johnson was concerned about 1/6 rioters, until he peeked outside and saw that everyone looked like him. Democrats realize how tough it is to partner with coworkers who would watch them die.

No one is a better informed opponent of the Senate filibuster than Jeff Merkley. Okay, one. But, Senator Merkley is in a great position at the moment to get something done about it.

A Texas woman in a bank refused to wear a mask and asked the intervening police officer “What are you going to do, arrest me?” You won’t believe what happened next!

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For pennies a day, you can help support Kagro in the Morning, hosted by David Waldman, and often cooperatively overlapped by Greg Dworkin, for the very latest in information, insight and entertainment... Except today’s show, for which David will be accepting bids beginning at $50 million, USD. (Payable through Patreon.)

Want to see some unity? Check out the approval numbers for the President of the United States, Joe Biden, and those for his American Rescue Plan relief bill, which he will be addressing tonight. Oh, what some would do or say to achieve numbers like that! Republican Senator Roger Wicker didn’t vote for the bill, (No Republican did.) but he did come up with the restaurant aid, (No he didn’t) Well, he was there when ideas happened, and at least he’s not like Marjorie Taylor, always tapping out when things become too intense. (Do that enough, and she’ll never be invited back to an orgy, let alone a committee.) By the way, Joe Manchin doesn’t want unity, he wants bipartisanship. Susan Collins vastly prefers bipartisanship over Democrats winning a vote. Have we mentioned our preferment of filibuster reform lately? Bernie Sanders agrees... now.

In the House, “no” still means no… unless it means “nay”. Republicans understand that means nothing to their voters. Rich Republicans DNGAF, at all.

1/6 insurrectionist, Oath Keeper, formerly of the Navy, formerly FBI, Thomas Caldwell, carries a gun shaped like a cellphone, you know, for the ”Karens”... But, why? Karens rock!

Fantastic news for Grandma huggers! COVID-19 hospitalizations have dropped more than 80% for both grannies and gramps since Joe showed up. All the Presidents have their vaccines, do you have yours? More importantly, did you get the coolest vaccine? Shut up! They are all great, beautiful in their own ways, but totally useless outside of your arm.

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David Waldman and Joan McCarter! Tuesday! KITM! No chaos can be altogether thrilling! You’ll adapt.

Finally! Senate Democrats have passed the Joe Biden administration’s, exclusively Democratic Party facilitated, American Rescue Plan, the most significant anti-poverty legislation passed in the U.S. in decades! Now it’s back to the House, then into the history books, and the pockets of people that need it.

The Dems seem solid, but just aren’t. Something is not quite… arrayed right. It might require quantum physics to explain the enigmatic Kyrsten Sinema and the inscrutable Joe Manchin, and calculate how to get them in line. David and Joan look in detail on how Manchin might be cajoled or coerced into doing the right thing, or the left thing, as it were.

A tougher, “talking” filibuster might succeed because Republicans didn’t take the job to “work”, and really aren’t in the habit. The $15 minimum wage amendment failed, but was it truly because of a lack of Democratic grit, or a wider, soon to be successful strategy? Today, David looked into the 14,000,605 procedures that if followed, could have turned out worse.

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David Waldman and Joan McCarter deliver Tuesday’s KITM as well as you’d expect. (As long as you expect perfection.)

Who didn’t know that Trump knew that Mohammed bin Salman murdered Jamal Khashoggi?

Governor Andrew Cuomo did remember to ask for consent before his third accused sexual harassment, but Cuomo probably should brush up on every other conceivable aspect of human interaction, perhaps on his own time. Lindsey Graham advocates for the Republican model.

Liberal Thinking is always welcome on KITM, especially when personified by the blogger of that name (and also the name of Rich). Rich returns with his series of ideas on enhancing the American Rescue Plan, today concentrating on getting the most out of budget reconciliation procedures to ensure the welfare of Americans.

Dems have avoided disarray for a while now, but that will soon become tougher once the COVID relief bill passes. Political-message bills are for losers, governing is for winners.

Filibusters are generally pretty bad. Even the original meaning of the word referred to nothing anyone should get mixed up in. Blue slips, although really blue, have increasingly become useful only for Gop obstruction.

The COVID-19 relief that communities of color are desperate for is on its way, minus Republican support. The bill is still in the Senate, with the lives of many hanging in the balance. Also hanging by a thread, the remains of the Voting Rights Act, and the voting rights of minority voters.

In Idaho, the Committee to Protect and Preserve the Idaho Constitution battle lawyers paid by the Idaho Constitutional Defense Fund.

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Remember last March? Okay, forget last March. David Waldman and Greg Dworkin introduce us to a much better one today:

Trump-who? at CPAC-what now? CPAC used to be the event Republican losers, looneys and nuts would gather at to say crazy stupid stuff. It still is, of course, but anymore that’s pretty much who they all are, and what they all say every day, and that just ruins everything. (No matter how much they rune everything.) So, A loser said loser things at a loser event. Even at CPAC, Donald couldn’t pull past 55% Don Jr. couldn’t make double digits even if Dad doesn’t run. None of them could win in the real world, therefore the real world has become their enemy. (France takes their corrupt, disgraced president and locks him up.)

Meanwhile, in the real world, Democrats need to get things done. The Senate continues to work on the COVID-19 relief bill. The $15 wage hike was abandoned, almost rescued, and deserted again. It ain’t over yet, maybe. Daily Kos, andKITM contributor, Liberal Thinking, whom you may call “Rich”, has many ideas and suggestions on how to enhance the American rescue plan. You can read Rich’s proposals, discuss them at the All Daily Kos Progressives community group, and now hear them as a series of short topics, starting with today’s show!

Joe Biden, union man, supports the Amazon workers' union vote in Alabama.

We keep making pandemic mistakes, but that doesn’t mean we can’t learn from our failures. Military members are a little gun-shy when it comes to vaccines, but can you blame them?

You might know Bill Harnsberger from his morning promos for Kagro in the Morning, or his contributions to local squirrel culture, but you really should know him for the Cheers & Jeers blog, which he has put together for over 17 years! It’s fundraising time for Bill, and fundsending time for you.

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Here it is, Friday, and David Waldman is still declining to host KITM Weekend. That just means that we’ll need to pack more into today. You, however, do have the next couple days to absorb it all:

Republicans tried Liz Cheney for heresy, and Liz almost got her pyre lit.  There is only room for one deity in this party, and Marjorie Taylor Green not only is the vessel for Trump’s love, Marj is Trump, manifest. (Until the Donald’s return.) Liz knows who to kneel to, now. Meanwhile, new scriptures will always need new interpretation. 

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez revealed the emotions of those inside the Capitol during the January 6 attacks. Nancy Mace revealed who she is. AOC supporters reveal their cute pets. As usual, Daniel Dale checks the facts.

House Republicans took four votes to show that they’re all in with QAnon now. David details the reasons and reasoning behind roll calls 22, 23, 24, and 25, including the Previous Question, the Five Minute Rule, what’s wrong with the Senate, and why it’s Aaron Burr’s fault.

It’s definitely not Canada’s fault, although even the US Senate has a Parliamentarian, and she will be a big part of the reconciliation process, most importantly the part where the Senate passes a $15 minimum wage. Joe Biden’s covid-relief plan is already a success with voters across the board. Keep up the good work, Joe!

Tracking devices weren’t Capitol rioters vaccines, they were right in their pants the whole time. A huge number of lunatics went directly from Donald Trump’s incendiary speech right into the Capitol. Not all of them, of course — did you see the lines to get in? Those same phones are tracking the FBI right back to them, all over the country. And, if needed, their phones can lead right to their bank accounts.

If Donald wants to debate his worthiness of impeachment, he knows where to go next week. In fact, he has a signed invitation.

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David Waldman and Greg Dworkin take us into the first February of the Biden administration, and it feels pretty good. Don’t worry, they will still be thagomizing Donald Trump when necessary.

About 20 million coronavirus vaccine doses have evaporated, and would be nice to have around now. It could be theft, lunacy, fraud, or just bad bookkeeping. More vaccines are being introduced, and more is better. Of course, efficacy, and your results, might vary. Keep safe and mask correctly.

Joe Biden has the opportunity to do the most for the nation as president, by continuing to do the most for the nation. Slowing down or playing it safe will be appreciated by no one, except for those who don’t have the nation’s wellbeing as a priority. Republicans are offering bipartisanship, unity, and bubkes. They’ll offer more or less the same in a meeting with the President this afternoon, unless more rational voices —  like from West Virginia —  can be heard.

Being held accountable is not “cancel culture”. Marjorie Taylor Greene might be the worst enemy for the causes that she supports, but for now, she’s doing pretty well for Marjorie Taylor Greene. It is difficult to expect Greene to be sane when her career has depended on being insane, or to tell the truth when her future career depends on the big lie. Republicans could have chosen a better path, but instead pay tribute to The Donald, and his scam in exile as the Antipope of Mar-a-Lago.

Trump’s lawyers bail out, knowing the upcoming impeachment trial will neither look good on their resumes, nor pay them a dime. What have we learned so far from Donald Trump’s campaign to subvert the election? Plenty, as Donald’s been subverting the 2020 election since he subverted the 2016 election. New stuff will be coming out, including the stuff that is old stuff for KITM listeners, and probably keep coming out for generations to come.

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David Waldman delivers the Tuesday KITM, fresh and relaxed from a recent visit to the warm Aristotelian paradise of Twitter.com. Relatively so — now that we’ve said Bye, Don and goodnight Mr. Pillow to finally break off our abusive relationships with the bad, to build relationships with just the good forever, ever, ever.

Maybe not. After his 4 years of scamming the federal government went… surprisingly well, actually… branding genius Donald Trump christened his latest imaginary president-in-exile scam the "Office of the Former President"  (Well, he couldn’t call it the Trump Foundation, could he?) Instead of steaks, Donald will be selling poison, also an unsettling marketing triumph for him. On January 6, Trump shot, and missed, both the Vice President and Speaker of the House.  His business model will demand that he shoot again. The Republican business model demands that they defend Donald Trump to the death… perhaps not their death, however.

Impeachment manager Eric Swalwell could call Republicans as Senate trial witnesses since after all, they are witnesses, victims, and maybe a bit more. Armando’s on today, to enumerate the many reasons why the impeachment trial should be tried in committee. Patrick Leahy, as Senate President Pro Tempore, will follow historical precedent to preside over the Senate impeachment trials of a non-president.

Joan McCarter calls in the last half hour to describe how Mitch McConnell is playing the beltway press again on the filibuster. Mitch is an old hand at this. Chuck Schumer won the committee power sharing battle, and soon will need to win the filibuster battle. Chuck does plan to win again. Democrats are taking control in helping Americans, and Joe Biden supports budget reconciliation to help them get things done.

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Wasn’t that so nice? President Joe Biden’s administration sure has higher production values and standards than Trump’s Presidential Apprentice. Much more likable cast, too. This show looks to have legs.

David Waldman, Greg Dworkin and Armando are here today, so you know we have a lot of information to go through. Sit down and pay attention. In two hours you can get back to your Bernie memes.

Is it only one day after “Day One”? Because, Joe Biden seems to already be weeks ahead on getting things done. He hasn’t golfed once, or even worn a tan suit. The President, has however said, “You’re fired!” to three of Donald Trump’s worst appointees. Joe makes this look so easy. After all, he has been practicing a while, and the fact is, Mr. Biden is also well suited for the position. Oh, and he won the election with a clear mandate.

All of this is hitting the Q-losers really hard. Without hate or fear, there isn’t much to rally behind. It’s killing right wing pundits, as fear and hate are what they use to pay their mortgages. Chasing after satire, Fox is now alarmed about COVID-19 deaths. Karl Rove pops out of some hole, shocked that the President pointed right at him and called him a racist. Republicans want Joe to understand that there can never be unity if there’s accountability.

Speaking of COVID-19 deaths, there sure are a lot of them, and the Trump administration somehow managed to have less than no plan to fix that. Joe Biden’s team’s “square one” therefore ends up being a mile behind the starting line. Former Mr. Olympia, Arnold Schwarzenegger, suggests everyone shut up and listen to the experts.

Democrats need a power sharing agreement with the Republicans… or is it the Patriot Party? Nuking the filibuster would seem to be the response, if no agreement on what “extraordinary circumstances" to use it is achieved.

Michael Flynn is a spy, but is his brother General Charles Flynn also an enemy agent? Someone stood the National Guard down on January 6, and Charles Flynn’s all-cap denials of being involved are turning out to be false.

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David Waldman kept me sane. Probably you, too. Is it thick or is it thin today? Either way, we always have a Kagro in the Morning to help go through it. We sure needed a lot of KITMs to get us to today. We all needed a KITM on November 9, 2016, so we got one, and we sure need one today, so here we are. Yay! Let’s all go get our questions answered and our marbles corralled:

Greg Dworkin joined Greta Thunberg and the rest of the world to present a one gun salute to the departing administration of… Of? ...Who was that guy again? 

No, we won’t forget Donald Trump that easily, or so soon, unfortunately. You know Trump will be back in some other form, like herpes. Oh, Donald Trump will always be around. He'll be all around in the dark — Trump’ll be everywhere. Wherever you can look - wherever there's a fight, so hungry people can eat, He’ll be there. Wherever there's a cop beatin' up a guy, Donald'll be there. He'll be in the way guys yell when they're mad…. Wait. No. Sorry Q-balls! Donald Trump’ll be in Mar-a-Lago.

Donald couldn’t remember Joe or Kamala this morning, but his last night at the White House was full of reminiscing about old friends like sloppy Stephen KG Bannon, and Elliott Broidy, the guy that threw himself on that Clearblue landmine to save Trump’s life back in ‘Nam, and uhm... Lil Wayne and Kodak Black. The rest aren’t “really friends” per se, it’s more like they have “shared interests”. Regrets go out to Rudy Giuliani and the kids, better luck next time!

Anyhow, Rudy is still finishing up his felonies and missed the deadline. Lauren Boebert just started, and isn’t even sure what the word “tour” means. Senator Ron Johnson is unhinged and uninformed, so the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel set him straight, with footnotes. Most of the nation’s Republican state attorneys general may have invalidated their own positions.

The one tap Trump turned off to the swamp, he made certain that he turned back on before he left.  Joe will turn it back off. Looneys will still loon, but white power will shrink. Democracy gets another chance, but Donald Trump needs to be convicted first. 

Robinette, eh? I’ll have to get used to typing that and many other cheerful things. The United States Joint Congressional Committee on Inaugural Ceremonies did a pretty good job today, especially whoever came up with selecting Amanda Gorman. Welcome to the new world! If Mitch and Chuck can come together on the filibuster, or even if they don’t, things are looking up.

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The curtain can’t come down hard enough on Donald Trump tomorrow, but today is Presidential Apprentice’s not-(fingers crossed)-so big finale!  Lil Wayne gets pardoned! Tiffany is engaged! It’s the craptacular ending we always hoped for! Lucky for us, we have David Waldman and Joan McCarter on KITM today for some quality time:

Now is, of course, the time to “look forward, not back”... Forward to Donald Trump’s impeachment trial, and his dozen or so court appearances over the next few years. Sure, Trump can be impeached, convicted, barred from ever holding office again—even after he's gone. Jonathan Turley expertly changes his position on impeachment of former officials, following the Republican tradition of picking a result and reasoning backwards.

Trump’s trials can start a minute after the Inaugural, but will probably be later. The priority now is getting through the Inaugural, a little over a week from the largest security breach in Washington DC in over 200 years. Riley June Williams and other key players have been caught, but there’s plenty of Quazy people still on the loose. Two U.S. Army National Guard members have been found to have ties to fringe right group militias and are probably receiving less than they deserve today. Thankfully, vetting National Guard members ahead of national special security events is routine. Texas Governor Greg Abbott would never question the behavior of Texas National Guard, especially once they showed their mettle in the Jade Helm wars of ‘15.

A teacher called to DC for the National Guard holds class from a Humvee.

Tomorrow afternoon we have a lot to look forward to in the Joe Biden presidency. Joe, Nancy Pelosi, and Chuck Schumer will take on Trump’s impeachment, but won’t let it get in the way of everything else, including Biden’s plan to cut child poverty in half. Chuck Schumer and Mitch McConnell share a 50-50 Senate, but Chuck gets the bigger half. Setting committee sizes and membership will be the focus now, with the experience of the closely divided Senate of 2001 as a guide.

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David Waldman brings us the latest William Belknap news and opinions, and much, much more today! 

Donald Trump made his long-awaited pivot yesterday, but you got to hope this won’t break Democrats’ stride toward action. Republican senators now (anonymously) regret not doing more to contain Trump. Donald, Jared, Ivanka, etc. could not be contacted for comment.

Remember when you see Capitol Police retreating from mobs, there’s an unarmed videographer running backwards beside them. Three New York Times journalists were at the Capitol when it was breached and can tell you how that felt.

Outside, the DC Guard and others stood down, leaving U.S.Capitol Police alone on the front lines, dying. Metaphorically, they’re still taking bullets today, with the Capitol Chief resigning, and the Senate sergeant-at-arms now fired. Donald Trump is less metaphorically killing off his own fan base, as well.

Donald Trump promised he’d be right there with the rioters, but you know how he prefers to watch stuff on the TV. After all, the only thing Donald is able to control is a switcher. Fresh out of lines, Don Jr. tried to capture his father’s love before the Capitol assault, but instead returned to shooting Kim Guilfoyle working it to “Gloria”.

Giant Foods kept the vaccine line moving by giving away shots before they went stale.

Republican Mary Miller, Illinois' 15th Congressional District, 5th column, wanted to point out how unappreciated Adolf Hitler is these days, an opinion that is rightfully unappreciated. Dominion Voting Systems plan to deliver $1.3 Billion of stfu to Sidney Powell.

Lauren Boebert wants to Q-aucus a right wing Squad, but for her it’s every posse for itself. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez has bigger concerns, and bigger clout. Democrats limit their effectiveness by holding themselves to standards that Republicans long ago abandoned. Finally, they are stepping away from PAYGO rules, at least for bills relating to COVID and climate change.

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This week we have entered a time paradox in which we hurdle towards January 6th, while January 7th feels like it’s moving farther away. David Waldman and Greg Dworkin deftly pilot us toward the black hole:

Donald Trump packed a few more impeachable and criminal, or at least censurable offenses into the weekend with the 19th phone call to Georgia Secretary of State Brad Raffensperger, to beg/extort one more vote than Joe Biden. Lindsey Graham and Rudy Giuliani tried in the past, but none can steal Donald’s wackadoodle thunder, as he showed he could Leeroy Jenkins with the best of them. That makes Raffensperger the big hero — nah, he isn’t. The Georgia Gop is still out to steal this election, as well as any future ones, but with more finesse.  And, if they can’t pilfer the Ossoff/Warnock tickets, they can now blame it on Trump.

Kelly Loeffler owns a WNBA team, but she doesn’t own its players.

Which all brings us to Wednesday’s coup. Yesterday, Democrats could have done something. Republican Chip Roy did. Louie Gohmert could’ve opposed Congress' Electoral College rules, but it slipped his “mind”. So, we know what will come next, and it does not include Trump or Trump-Republicans winning. This might not matter to them, as their goal is to piss in the well and show loyalty to the Confederacy. Devin Nunes and Jim Jordan won their Cross of Honor. Can Marjorie Taylor Greene be enough of an asshole to qualify in these closing days? Yes, she can!

A hospital staffer sought to lift spirits, but instead aerosolized coronavirus with his “unnamed” holiday themed inflatable costume. The Feds might cut vaccine doses in half so that twice as many Americans feel like they have been vaccinated. At least overall, we should be getting smarter soon.

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David Waldman rings out the old year today, but don’t expect any ringing in of the new until Monday’s KITM:

Mike Pence cancelled his trip to Israel and Donald Trump cancelled his appearance at Mar-a-Lago’s New Year’s Eve party. Some people have a bad feeling about this. It’s probably not good news, but it might not be bad news. After all, early and youth voting in Georgia is freaking out Trump and the Gop, and that’s good. There’s also the chance that Donald doesn’t really know or care who Ossoff and Warnock are. So, maybe Trump is returning to see what he can do to get $2000 to people in need… Yeah, we know that he came back to plot with fellow dimwit grifters and double-dealing sycophants on one last big heist while they still can.

Ok, the COVID-19 pandemic took us a little off guard, but then everyone understood for at least 9 months the need for a fast, coordinated rollout so… WTF? Greg Dworkin, who developed strategies a decade or so ago, rounds up the screw ups. The system is showing plenty of weak links, along with the problem of people cutting in line, while scores at the head are now refusing to take the shot. Any solution that keeps the line moving might be the best solution. Also, a temperature snag delayed vaccine shipments to Texas, just as a Wisconsin hospital employee deliberately removed almost 600 doses from refrigeration.  

Almost-Congresswoman María Elvira Salazar will miss swearing in on Sunday due to COVID-19. Unlike fellow Republican Luke Letlow, she will have a make-up date.

Ian Reifowitz calls in during the last half hour (Make a resolution to pick up a copy of Ian’s “The Tribalization of Politics: How Rush Limbaugh's Race-Baiting Rhetoric on the Obama Presidency Paved the Way for Trump”) to discuss all of the above topics and events, and to describe where Donald Trump and the Republican party would be be without their history of race and class resentment. (They would be where there weren’t any votes, for sure.)

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Armando’s in the house! Virtually — and Greg Dworkin, and of course, David Waldman, so you’d expect a process and umbrage filled KITM. Not so much umbrage as you might expect, though. Of course, Donald Trump has earned every bit of disdain he’s received, and then some. It’s just that Donald and the 2020 nightmares are ending and COVID help is coming. What can Trump do now, other than get a few people, or a few thousand, or a few million, killed?

Almost Louisiana Congressman Luke Letlow felt masks were optional. So is COVID, for that matter. Healthy people are dying when their own antibodies respond to COVID by killing them. If the goal is to reach 80% of Americans vaccinated, we aren’t getting there with this administration. Elderly in Florida are given one more big chance to die from COVID while in line for the vaccine.

Onto process! Which, as KITM listeners know better than anyone else, is the way this whole thing will get fixed… or destroyed. Mitch McConnell is poison-pilling survival checks going into New Years. That’s ok by Trump, he likes poisoning more than paying. Bernie Sanders and Nancy Pelosi are prepared to spend the holiday prying the additions and a few Republicans off the bill.

Trump is filing a petition to the Supreme Court on Wisconsin now. Even judges are trolling the Kraken strike force. Few surprises there… well, maybe a few, but those will be later. The next big show is on January 6, when the seditious circus rolls into town. Mike Pence probably won’t go Manchurian for Louie Gohmert after all. MIke was planning to bug out on the 7th to the middle east where it’s safe, but even that plan is in doubt.

You have less than a week to study up on the electoral college certification process! Not that anything will come from these shenanigans, mind you, but if you want to follow half of what will be said on this show the next few days, it’s a must.

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It’s Two Topic Tuesday on KITM! The glimmer of civilization today in the form of $2000 survival checks, and our subsequent collapse into barbarism 8 days later. David Waldman brings on Joan McCarter, busy the last few days installing a new house inside of her old house, for discussion and analysis:

Thank you, Donald Trump! Donald self-served America right into Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’ hands. Even Kelly Loeffler and David Perdue are beginning to feel the Bern! Mitch McConnell is now on the hot seat after the House passes its $2000 direct COVID-19 payments bill. Mitch didn’t listen the first 9000 times or so, but Democrats might have his attention today. (No, I guess not. Dems will keep on knocking)

Republicans, now fans of socialism, hope to check out communism next week. Louie Gohmert believes it’s time for Mike Pence to play a little solitaire, but will the red queen come through for the Red revolution? Arizona bolshevists tried to deliver forged votes, assisted by fellow-travelling apparatchiks. Luckily, security measures were in place and held. We now know their exact plan of attack, but that doesn’t mean they’re not out there, still scheming.

Oh, and one more thing, lest we forget. We are still dying by the thousands, each and every day, from COVID-19. Donald Trump’s Operation Warp Speed choked like a dog, and is guaranteed by design to continue to fail.

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It's a Wonderful Rerun!

Enjoy our Boxing Day 2019 extravaganza!

Whether you are post, pre, or peri holiday, enjoy it informed with David Waldman on today’s KITM:

Greg Dworkin rounds up the polls and punditry of recent Christmas past: 

The more people understand the impeachment process, the more they would like to apply it to Donald Trump. As the election approaches, voters are still figuring out what needs to be done. Of course Republicans would prefer they went in the other direction, any other direction, or even no direction, at this point they don’t care. You fact checking them makes you part of the joke. Christians take a break from the heads of pins to divide over pinheads. Trump supporters aren’t racists, but… they absolutely are. The fight over the 1619 Project shows that we are far from where we pretend to be on race.

It did take a while, but Chuck Todd has begun to notice some dissembling by Trump mouthpieces. Is Chuck just plain stupid, or strategically stupid? How did someone like Chuck Todd even get here? David knows, and reveals Todd’s early days and The Hotline ethos. We are deep in an epistemic crisis and need to claw back to reality.

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David Waldman, opens today’s KITM yawning like the MGM lion, waking us up for Christmas eve:

Donald Trump keeps handing out pardons like moist candy canes to anyone that met him under the mistletoe over the last few years. Donald pardoned Jesse Benton as a gift to his employers, Ron Paul and Mitch McConnell and the uncle of Benton's wife, Rand Paul… (Jesse will probably be Matt Gaetz’ son by the end of the day.) Trump pardoned a former Maryland police officer whose heart he knew was in the right place. (They need to be arrested faster than Trump can pardon them.) Merry Christmas! Trump’s Blackwater pardons aren’t bringing much cheer to their victim’s families, however. There’s bound to be more today, but Dad’s saving the nicest ones for under the tree in Mar-a-Lago.

Greg Dworkin reminds us that actually, Donald Trump doesn’t give gifts to anyone but himself. If he can take someone else’s gift, it’s even better. Merry F***ing Christmas to everyone in Congress with the Gop at each other’s throats and Democrats trying to pull $2000 checks out of the fireplace. It seems that Trump might be a little over his head still on how government works, or how reality works for that matter. Kelly Loeffler, too. Two Republican House members voted by proxy — while simultaneously suing to ban the use of proxy voting .

Ron DeSantis figures, why appoint experts when he can be the guy that says expert things? Rep.-elect Luke Letlow checked himself into the hospital for no particular reason, and is now thinking about checking out the ICU for the holidays. People who are immunocompromised or otherwise allow coronavirus to hang around for while might encourage unfortunate mutations.

Did Bill Barr arrest Lev Parnas to keep him from testifying against Donald Trump? Did a Democratic House candidate lose by 6 votes after 22 votes were improperly excluded in Iowa? Did the Kansas City Star misreport on Black Kansas Citians for generations? Yes.

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David Waldman wrestled his Christmas tree to get to the KITM(™?) microphone — and won! — for a crazy start to a not so crazy show. Greg Dworkin says that whether you believe in sanity this time of the year or not, these holidays are becoming happier, saner and more cheerfully, boringly, Trump-free each day.

Donald is still out there, but he’s mostly Republican’s problem now. The news can, and should, turn away. (And they will, because the money’s going away.) Sure, ‘tis the season for unity, and all that, but let’s not go crazy! Red-states and counties do love to see blue-state presents under their tree, but they’re showing up strangely empty-handed right when their arms should be full.

More sanity: Americans are growing less reluctant to take a COVID-19 vaccine. Congressional negotiators might get a coronavirus rescue package by taking out the crazy bits. It’s an early Christmas for some Black colleges and universities, as  MacKenzie Scott shows Ex Jeff Bezos how it’s done.

Yet, there is still insanity: Lunatics put Republicans into their positions, and unsurprisingly, might come and take them out. A Qanon-Republican (Is there any other kind?) was arrested for child pornography, and should be checked for adrenochrome levels. A former cop/paid vigilante in Texas almost kills an air-conditioner repairman in order to feed his delusions and bank account. Then, of course, there is the King of Cranks, crushing the CDC, destroying CDC records on coronavirus, all while having information suppressed in Florida. No wonder his future neighbors don’t want him in their backyards.

Caregivers decide how to spread the still too rare vaccine ethically, while Donald Trump rushes through lethal injection drugs, and slow-walks Regeneron. Thousands will die tonight, and tomorrow, and the days following. Trump lost the worst war we ever fought.

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David Waldman delivers a new KITM, still available in all 50 states! (We still have 50 states, right?)

Joe Biden was elected President of the United States; Donald Trump is trying overthrow democracy to take that title. This is just another example of the polarization of politics… or actually sedition. Nope it doesn’t matter what side of the political divide you’re on. The new embrace of political polarization reveals the worst side of bothsideism-er-ists, as Trump Gimmetarians who don’t want to risk losing, especially when they know they deserve to lose, rig the system because they just know you would if you were them.

The Electoral College prepares to hand Donald Trump the loss he still refuses to accept. Trump continues to make perfect phone calls for those to join his lost cause, and the Kraken Caucus is right there to dead-end with him. Trump will lose for the umpteenth time, but maybe that’s not the point.  For Ted Cruz and Marco Rubio, it’s business as usual, for others it’s a whole new career. Wisconsin might not be totally on the ball, but at least they aren’t getting mixed up in this.

Other countries have procedures in place to handle problems similar to this, but maybe we’re just too nice. We went and forgot the Alamo and let Santa Anna chew gum in exile on Staten Island. Mar-a-Lago has a new print of Donald Trump on the cover of Responsible Statecraft framed above the bar, waiting for Donald to make Palm Beach great again. Donald’s real and fake families do need a place to pretend to live, and who knows, maybe Melania might visit… and of course,  folks like the Syrians need an address to send their check.

Twitter has a big red button marked @realDonaldTrump they’re going to punch the moment Joe’s right hand goes up.

Rona Rudy went to Michigan, a place where people have caught Covid. Coincidence? Maybe! One thing’s for certain, none of them are getting the cocktail.

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David Waldman and Greg Dworkin are back together again! Ok, it hasn’t been that long, but it’s always good news when it happens! 

Good news also for those who disagree with how another state handles electoral votes, COVID-19, gun laws, abortion, same sex marriage, etc. —  Just have your state sue their state! There was a time states just didn’t care for that, supposedly. Now it turns out, some states, like Georgia, are maybe into that sort of thing. C'est la vie! Except, of course, for the officials who toss out their state’s electoral votes because they fear for their lives. Plenty of loons are standing by for that word from Donald Trump, or maybe their pet dog, to start boogin’. Sleeper cells are waking up in Congress as we speak. Mitt Romney senses that it’s time to act alarmed again.

Ah, but someday, like a miracle, Donald will disappear.  Well, maybe not quite a miracle. But before he does, Joe Biden should stay out of the way of the authorities that do want to see Trump for moment or two. Until then, friends of Trump are friends with benefits. Michael Flynn’s pardon doesn’t make him innocent, but he’s still pardoned. David Perdue picked up $1.8 million from a guy, after he passed that guy’s bill. Trump installed a friend in the Pentagon who immediately sent all the money to a friend of both of theirs.

Nobody hates people getting benefits more than the guy that just missed qualifying for them. This is what’s called “economic anxiety”… which also includes being anxious about any people of color, whatever their actual class.

South Dakota Governor Kristi Noem notes that COVID-19 isn’t so bad if you don’t have it, and those that do, grease the wheels of progress. Over 3,000 went into the gears last night. Sweden thought this was a good plan too, for a while. RonaRudyTooty finds no downside with this system.

Whistleblower Rebekah Jones accessed a public email, and either that, or the whistleblowing, got her in a heap of trouble in Florida. She released video of her raid, and the feud continues.

Fort Hood’s systemic rot is so pervasive, they finally had to fire 14 Army leaders, including a general. They should rename the place and start over.

Chuck Schumer needed to take Dianne Feinstein aside to tell her that she should step down from the Senate Judiciary Committee... twice. A conversation that probably needs to come up more often.

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Wednesday may be Sundae at Carvel, but it’s Law Day at KITM.

First, a little more on that 1,500-lawyer open letter that Joan told us about yesterday, just to set the stage for another story about lawyers protesting. This time, it’s a protest of Florida Man governor Ron DeSantis sending the cops to raid the home of former state data scientist Rebekah Jones, in what Jones says is a foundationally-shaky retaliation for exposure of DeSantis’s demands for supporting his preferred COVID lies.

BREAKING NEWS: Something, something, Donald Trump, aliens, and the former head of the Israeli space agency you never knew existed.

Safe Harbor Day has come and gone, but Trump’s (or not-Trump’s, depending) courthouse shenanigans continue, despite still more increasingly-decisive setbacks, and even as the “Elite Strike Force” is felled by the COVID strike force. Florida Man attorney Armando joins us for a generalized thrashing of what passes for the Trump “plan” of attack, featuring 100% more law! In a late-breaking but unsurprising development, Trump’s pounding of the table rings false, too.

With Trump’s chances to stall or reverse state certifications behind us, what problems might still lie ahead? For one thing, there’s the long-term damage to the credibility of our system, facilitated even by “decent Republicans.” But beyond that, there’s still the January 6th Joint Session, where Congress counts and ratifies the Electoral College vote. We know that a couple Members widely regarded as kooks plan to try to muck up the works. But what about the vaunted “institutionalists?” Well, no. They look like they’re all in, too.

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It wouldn’t be a Tuesday KITM without Joan McCarter! Or, without David Waldman, of course! (Who would answer the phone when she called in?)

Wasn’t today the day Donald Trump was supposed to shut up about the election? Was it next Monday?  Three Wednesdays from next? For now, the coup continues. Donald has a favor to ask of the Pennsylvania House Speaker, though. Trump called him twice, in case he’s hard of hearing. That’s the third state he’s personally leaned on, that we know of. “We” doesn’t necessarily include Donald Trump, because who knows on what level Donald “knows” anything at this point. “Coup”, however, is not an overstatement. Anyone who thinks it is, doesn’t know the meanings of the term.

Kool Aid drinker Lou Dobbs confronted Kool Aid vendor Stephen Miller about Republican coup dawdling. Texas won’t secede until they first use the Supreme Court to sue enemy states. (Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton is playing a little Trump-dimensional chess here.)

Just put Ken Paxton on Donald Trump’s Christmas pardon list. Donald has so many pardons planned, he might put together a “form letter” pardon or possibly more of a “Mad Libs” pardon for Rona-Rudy-Tooty-Jack A’roony-Giuliani. 1,500 attorneys are calling for bar associations across the country to investigate members of Trump's "elite strike force". Rudy and Jenna Ellis plan to fight them all the way to the highest traffic court. Jenna just discovered one more reason not to sit near Rudy Giuliani. We here at KITM wish this monster well, along with her friends and family. Unless, one of them is Mitch McConnell. McConnell can bite a big COVID-19 and chew it.

Mitch McConnell still holds COVID-19 relief hostage, and maybe some Senate Democrats are going to cave in. Mitch protects Postmaster Jerk Louis DeJoy as well. If we get Georgia, we can fix all of this and more.

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David Waldman and Greg Dworkin deliver a Monday KITM from a thankfully dwindling supply of Monday KITMs in this administration.

Have an introspective Pearl Harbor day. Did you know that more people will die from Covid-19 today, than died at Pearl Harbor in 1941? Kind of a pain in the ass to have to consider that, isn't it? Tomorrow is “Safe Harbor” day, which who knows, might mean something this year.

Georgia has recounted, and Brian Kemp is reannouncing the recertification of presidential election results. (Joe wins.) Will there be more phony-baloney lawsuits? Sure, but they’ll be thrown out even quicker. Based on their Georgia Senate debates, Jon Ossoff and Raphael Warnock win by default. 

Donald Trump is disappearing, like a miracle. He is falling off the front page, and as you know, Donald hates that. Sure, it will take a long time to get the stink out, but even if Trump hang-glided off Air Force One into Mar-a-Lago, come Inauguration Day he won’t be president. Some scary violent nutballs and fascists will stick around, but actually smart Republicans and Democrats will only want to see Donald Trump again in court.

At the moment, the places that really need airing out are the ones Rona-Rudy Giuliani was sitting in.  Open the windows, please! Something just doesn’t smell right with Trump’s lawyer Jenna Ellis, either.

Here come the Covid-19 vaccines! Rest assured, however, that wherever you are in the line, you ain’t in the front. There aren’t much vaccines yet to go around either, so take it easy on the featherheads that still won’t put on masks. After all, if we outlaw mask non-compliance, only outlaws won’t wear masks. And yet, you could look at swiss cheese and find a better solution to Covid-19 than Swedish government has come up with until now.

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David Waldman delivers the Friday KITM... Yay, it’s Friday! Joe Biden just might be making weekends great again. Notice how they have been becoming a little less dreadful lately? Donald Trump is falling off the front page… although his stain will persist for a long time.

Oh, Donald is still out there. But, he’s squeezed the last pennies from the rubes, the Republican lampreys are detaching, Trump’s left out there punching himself in the face, and losing. It’s his word against his now, and no one is listening.

A few dead-end swindlers remain to snuffle up the dregs. Alleged onanist-flatulist Rudy Giuliani couldn’t even mortify himself into the spotlight in Michigan once ultra-wack job Mellissa Carone took the stage. Who should play Carone on Saturday Night Live? Cut her a check, and she’ll be there, herself. Cut enough checks and SNL won’t need a cast.

This doesn’t mean fraud has left politics. The Florida attorney that gave seminars on fraud-voting in Georgia didn’t come up with the idea, you know. Josh Hawley, still paving the way for Trump lies, pretends to live at his sisters place when he needs to vote out of state.

Third or fourth time’s the charm for Mariannette Miller-Meeks, winning by 1.1 handfuls of a vote over Rita Hart, which would have gone the other way if Iowa counted votes like other states.

Democrats pick Rosa DeLauro to be the next House Appropriations Committee chairwoman, although fundraising performance might have pointed to Debbie Wasserman Schultz. Don’t worry, as long as Debbie’s money sticks around, so will she. Sean Patrick Maloney takes over the DCCC and is ready for a fight, which will be what he is going to recieve.

Donald Trump’s eyes and ears at the Department of Justice got lopped off.

China’s Sinovac tried to Sinobribe its Coronavac into approval. Pass on that one.

Adolf Hitler Uunona wins election in Namibia, but has no plans to move on to world domination during his first term. His name wasn’t much of a hindrance there as Namibians aren’t bothered so much about that particular era in German history.

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Mmm — leftovers! Not here though. David Waldman and Armando deliver a piping fresh KITM right to your ears today. Don’t bother to get off the couch, just finish off that can of cranberry sauce and tub of Cool Whip, and tune in!

Diaper Don sat behind his widdle desk yesterday and had only widdle things to say. Hell yes, Donald Trump is “stepping down” for Joe Biden, of course, he’s not coming to the inauguration.  We’ve had Trump’s number for some time now. He’ll continue to destroy the country of course, but that’s barely been a side interest for him. Real despotism is a lot of work. Pardoning people takes so little effort that he can work a couple in between holes.

The Right loves dead liberals. That’s because people actually respect dead liberals, plus you can have them say whatever you want. Almost as good, are fake ex-liberals, because you know they’re going where the grift is deepest and won’t get tripped up by any sticky ideology. Things will be fine, if you only remember to not give your money to them. A guy dropped $2.5 million on True the Vote Inc., which bought him “vague responses, platitudes, and empty promises” — exactly what he payed for. Hopefully, none of you paid for a Kraken, because the delivery date keeps getting pushed back, and release might not be so imminent.

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Welcome to our annual KITM Thanksgiving Special, with your hosts, David Waldman and Greg Dworkin, and their special guests, the Loudoun County Rockettes! Brought to you by… you. We sure couldn’t have done it without you. We’re still grateful for you, even if your name might possibly be mispronounced by us. (David’s got “Nevada”, “Latiñes” and “Latines” down pat, now if only he could say “adversary”…)

There is a lot to be thankful for! 80,000,000 legal votes. 306 electoral votes. Over 30 transparently idiotic lawsuits, and counting. Several of the dumbest, craziest lawyers in the country. We should thank The Resistance, fighting from the last inauguration right up to this one. And, the few, proud, honest Republicans... Webcams on laptops, relaying LGBT bashers’ laptops to Zoom. And, John P. Flannery, the Robert Redford of Willy Wonkas, all out there, fighting the good fight. 

It’s no time to get sick of winning. Trump started rigging this election when the last one ended. Trump hasn’t quit endangering the world and his corruption won’t stop until it is stopped.

Yesterday, the Trump Supreme Court and their new superspreader Justice put a big boot heel on both state’s rights, and public health by blocking New York’s coronavirus restrictions on houses of worship, formally trading “latte drinking Prius drivers” with “wine drinking bicycle riders” in the Supreme Court lexicon.

David Perdue and Kelly Loeffler are bad people who you shouldn’t be trusting, but they sure are rich.

Meanwhile, we die from a preventable disease. Idiocy remains popular in South Dakota. You can even lose your job if you aren’t one. West Virginia can’t keep up... in fact, they don’t really want to. Perhaps, if we only had more self-destructive door-knockers, we’d have more Democrats in Congress. 

While Democrats remind themselves that their Latine and Black constituencies aren’t monolithic, it would also help to remember that Asia is a big place also. 

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David Waldman and Greg Dworkin are in for a pre-Thanksgiving KITM, and just so you don’t miss them, they’ll be back for Thanksgiving too!

Today, Donald Trump will reveal election blockbuster news in Gettysburg, Pennsylvania at… psych! Donald’s currently pantsless watching TV, unwilling to even assist his loyal stooges in destroying America.

President-elect Joe Biden is president. Trump has been in absentia since he started. The election wasn’t close, but it was a nail-biter for democracy for a while.  The election proves Republicans don’t care about America, or they only care about the America who voted for them, who pretty much hate America. The Republican officials that saved the country were heretics and apostates that prefer facts and truth and democracy and integrity over party. They will be dealt with accordingly. For your weekend reading (Sure, it is Wednesday, but it will take you till Monday to read all of it.) check out the essential and extensive inside story Michigan’s fake voter fraud scandal. Of course, this won’t be the end of it. Mostly Black, urban areas like Detroit will have to keep on fighting.

The transition delay is going to cost lives. Nearly a sixth of the Senate Republican caucus has tested positive for coronavirus, as none of them are smart enough to wear a mask, and watching Hannity makes them more stupid every day.

History will demand to know why we didn’t put Donald Trump in front of a firing squad. Donald Trump would want a state funeral and burial at Arlington Cemetery if only for the reason that they’d be taxpayer funded, and an eternal grift.

Jared and Ivanka pulled their 3 kids from a DC Jewish school, and you can be sure the school had a cake that day to celebrate. Unfortunately, that means Javanka had to go somewhere else, and there goes that neighborhood.

Meanwhile, Republicans quietly plot to sink Biden nominees. Steven Mnuchin will put $455 billion where Janet Yellen can’t get to it. Fraudster John Lott has has quickly slid into the Justice Department. The Office of Management and Budget gets Schedule F’ed. Trump unlocks the backdoor for Russia and throws away the key.

Honestie Hodges, famous for being handcuffed by police at age 11, has died of COVID-19 at age 14.

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Get in. David Waldman takes the wheel and drives us another 2 hours away from the last 4 years.

Doesn’t it feel pleasant watching Donald Trump recede in our rearview mirror? He’s getting so tiny! Soon, he’ll just be an insane little dot down in Mar-a-Lago... probably, but who cares?

Today, Trump will pardon the national Thanksgiving turkey. On January 20, he’ll be dragged, kicking and screaming, sadly metaphorically, from the White House. In between, it will just be the usual bitter, corrupt bs that fewer and fewer should pay attention to. Except prosecutors. They need to listen up.

Unfortunately, objects like Donald are always closer than they appear. From now on, even landslide election wins will be challenged. Pennsylvania Republicans voted against certification of a county that Trump won by 22,000 votes.  Misinformation superspreaders, White-power terrorists and Dimwit Republicans have more power than ever, and all of them are armed. Back in the day, Senators didn’t need a gun to win an argument, when a cane would do. Of course, guns always do it more efficiently and from a distance.

How much more real can COVID-19 get? In all 50 states deaths are higher than normal. Sturgis-borne coronavirus has spread like locusts back out to the coasts. Correspondent Brian Munroe and Dan Rather try to bring perspective to the plague.

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Hmm-Lliiiiiivvvve! David  Waldman welcomes KITM’s regular, yet special, Tuesday guest Joan McCarter to discuss the important things happening and not happening today.

Donald Trump, who was never really president, but is now somehow in exile, is plotting his return.  About 3000 votes have turned up in Georgia, almost 1000 in the Trump Glorious Victory column. Only several million more to go! Rather than dig up Trump votes, Lindsey Graham realized it would be easier and quicker to just not count Biden votes. So, he rung up Georgia’s secretary of state, and Arizona’s, and Nevada’s to see if any might be able to work in a few felonies into their counts.

Trump’s lawyers also turned out to be slackers when it came to going to jail for their client. Donald knew who he should turn to in times like these, but Rudy Giuliani was available, so he’s got the job. It’s been a while, but Rudy still has a few tricks up his sleeve!

Joe Biden has put together a White House senior staff short on his kids, their in-laws, or even their girlfriends. Donald Trump is still blocking the lot of them. Congress has less than two weeks to keep government funded, or provide COVID-19 relief. Meanwhile, House Democrats will elect most of their leadership team this week. David can give you a tip on how to guess the outcome of these things, although it’s less effective for Republicans.

The toppling of Confederate statues in Portsmouth Virginia led to political retaliation by the police against a state senator and several local Black leaders. So far, the police chief has been fired and the charges dropped.

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Soon, we won’t have Donald Trump to kick around, anymore. Geraldo Rivera says it’s time for Trump to walk away with “grace and dignity.” Easier said than done for Donald. His crazy train has never been on the rails. Don’t be concerned, there’s plenty of nitwits and bozos coming up the ranks to occupy David Waldman each day.

87 year old, 25 term Republican Don Young might have pulled his last idiotic move. Too bad that COVID-19 doesn’t just infect people ironically.

Jonathan Turley used to play a smart guy on TV, but dropped that gig a few years ago. Now he’s Donald Trump’s idea of a smart guy, affecting gravitas on Donald’s all cap tweets about Dominion Voting Systems stealing his votes. You know you’ve hit bottom when you’re being “Well, actually”-ed by Steve Doocy on Fox & Friends. Even extremely progressive blogs aren’t that crazy, lately.

The postal worker that claimed voter fraud, recanted, then retracted his recantation, now says he was scripted. Result: Profit! How will we ever remove the Trump Deep State and drain his swamp?

Democrats can fix things... or try to throttle each other into disarray as if power was a finite resource that deplenishes when shared. Power and money, when invested wisely, demonstrates leadership and strength.

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Pick up a bowl and get in line as David Waldman and Greg Dworkin ladle up 2 hours of KITM for the soul:

Winner, winner, chicken dinner! Joe Biden won! We might as well keep celebrating, as here it is, almost the middle of November, and there are still people just figuring this out. Some Trump followers are coming to grips with reality. Some are following the advice of their chickens and are moving on.

Karl Rove understands the election won’t be overturned. Trump evangelical Robert Jeffress calls Joe Biden “president-elect”. Hugh Hewitt will not only tell you Biden’s the one, but he approves of Joe’s Chief of Staff pick, Ronald Klain. Oklahoma Republican Senator James Lankford says he will fight for Biden’s right to intelligence briefings. Even British Prime Minister Boris Johnson calls Donald Trump America's “previous president”.

No chicken could be as dumb as a focus group undecided voter. Still — a vote is a vote. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and Abigail Spanberger both found more votes than their Republican opponents, which is kind of how they won their elections.

The middle of November is also about the time presidents pardon turkeys… and felons. Lame-duck Donald might try to save his own neck from the chopping block. It’s not a good time to be a Trump lawyer. Snell & Wilmer withdraw from their election lawsuit in Maricopa County, Arizona. Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton’s goose might be cooked. James O’Keefe’s stool pigeons find GoFundMe isn’t chicken feed.

Donald Trump’s next target to destroy is Fox News, but generally Donald needs to own a business to destroy it.

The COVID-19 pandemic topped 140,000 cases yesterday, it will continue to become more horrible until the Biden administration can take over, and even then there will be heckling from the sidelines. There is no place to hide, and no “miracle cure”… inoculating against coronavirus is only one of the technological, logistical, and societal hurdles to come. 

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David Waldman and Greg Dworkin welcome back Denise Oliver Velez, whose inestimable breadth and depth of experience, activism and legacy in racial, cultural and political affairs can illuminate our way out of Donald Trump’s morass.

Denise visits KITM on Veterans Day, a subject she is also well-suited to address, as military service is a tradition in her family, notably her Tuskegee Airman father! 

Today’s principal topic however, and probably the principal topic for America’s foreseeable future, is the Latiñe voting bloc, which can’t be reached with just a few spanish words, and is far from a single voting bloc, with regional, class, religious and racial differences driving their lives and their votes. Trump got out the Hispanic vote across the country by not taking them or their needs for granted.

Nonetheless, Joe Biden won the presidency. Yes, indeed. It’s a slow-motion beat-down, folks. The biggest win for a challenger since FDR. In addition, a team of international observers found no systemic fraud in U.S. elections. The New York Times found no fraud. The AP says there’s no widespread fraud. There is nothing to see here... And, that is why Georgia is going to hand recount all of the votes — to build trust and respect (and watch Donald Trump lose twice).

Meanwhile, the inaugural committee meets with only half of the members willing to say who’s being inaugurated.  The inauguration is set to be a mosh pit, half a million deep.