Rude Tales of Magic
Branson Reese and his jester's retinue, Christopher Hastings, Carly Monardo, Tim Platt, Joe Lepore, and Ali Fisher, buck and bumble through the magical backwater world of Cordelia. One hopes you enjoy both japes AND scrapes, because honestly, it would be impossible to disentangle one from the other, given their profound entwinement in this particular piece of entertainment. Produced by Taylor Moore @ Fortunate Horse.
We'll be back in two weeks with the (and I am not kidding here) THRILLING follow up to Maestro. Until then, PARSE with us won't you?
The other episode of Parsely is in a big haunted house and it has the whole cast! Go get it here: https://www.patreon.com/rudetalesofmagic
PARSELY is the delightful creation of Jared Sorensen, and you can get your copy here: http://www.memento-mori.com/
Our Patreon is seriously the best there is, and it's about to get even better. Soon, our Patreon will be appointed to a Federal Judgeship, and then it's over for the "bozos." All that's missing is you. If you're already a subscriber, thank you. If not, well, it's never too early to blossom into the patron butterfly THE LORD intended you to be. Do so HERE.
Check out our store at rudetalesofmagic.com for HOT HOT deals on sweet sweet shirts, live show recordings, and more! We got Polaris University sweaters for the cold weather! We thought of everything, if everything is shirts!
And follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.
We're very happy to now publicly thank our exec producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul. Without your support we'd have an actual bucket for a hat, instead of these very nice bucket hats. Thank you.
This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.
NEXT LIVE SHOW THIS FRIDAY! Check out rudetalesofmagic.com for tix.
Our Patreon is seriously the best there is, and it's about to get even better. Soon, our Patreon will be appointed to a Federal Judgeship, and then it's over for the "bozos." All that's missing is you. If you're already a subscriber, thank you. If not, well, it's never too early to blossom into the patron butterfly THE LORD intended you to be. Do so HERE.
Check out our store at rudetalesofmagic.com for HOT HOT deals on sweet sweet shirts, live show recordings, and more! We got Polaris University sweaters for the cold weather! We thought of everything, if everything is shirts!
And follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.
We're very happy to now publicly thank our exec producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul. Without your support we'd have an actual bucket for a hat, instead of these very nice bucket hats. Thank you.
This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.
NEW LIVE SHOW ANNOUNCED! Check out rudetalesofmagic.com for show dates and tickets!
Our Patreon is seriously the best there is, and it's about to get even better. Soon, our Patreon will wrestle with GOD, and defeat her. All that's missing is you, ya handsome lil hepcat. If you're already a subscriber, thank you. If not, well, it's never too early to blossom into the patron butterfly THE LORD intended you to be. Do so HERE.
Check out our store at rudetalesofmagic.com for HOT HOT deals on sweet sweet shirts, live show recordings, and more! We got Polaris University sweaters for the cold weather! We thought of everything! And hooboy you're REALLY gonna love the new additions.
And follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.
We're very happy to now publicly thank our exec producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul. Without your support we'd have an actual bucket for a hat, instead of these very nice bucket hats. Thank you.
Our Patreon is seriously the best there is, and it's about to get even better. Soon, our Patreon will wrestle with GOD, and defeat her. All that's missing you you, ya handsome lil hepcat. If you're already a subscriber, thank you. If you're not, well, it's never too early to blossom into the patron butterfly THE LORD intended you to be. Do so HERE.
Check out our store at rudetalesofmagic.com for HOT HOT deals on sweet sweet shirts, live show recordings, and more! We got Polaris University sweaters for the cold weather! We thought of everything! And hooboy you're REALLY gonna love the new additions.
And follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.
We're very happy to now publicly thank our exec producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul. Without your support we'd have an actual bucket for a hat, instead of these very nice bucket hats. Thank you.
This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates all sort of brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.
Our Patreon is INFAMOUS for being TOO good, and in all sincerity, it's what keeps the show going. If you're already a subscriber, thank you. If you're not, well, it's never too early to blossom into the patron butterfly THE LORD intended you to be. Do so HERE.
Check out our store at rudetalesofmagic.com for HOT HOT deals on sweet sweet shirts, live show recordings, and more! We got Polaris University sweaters for the cold weather! We thought of everything! And hooboy you're REALLY gonna love the new additions.
And follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.
We're very happy to now publicly thank our exec producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul. Without your support we'd have an actual bucket for a hat, instead of these very nice bucket hats. Thank you.
This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates all sort of brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.
AND!! The "Trashlands" music appears courtesy of Derek & Brandon Fiechter. You can support them on Bandcamp right here
Our Patreon is INFAMOUS for being TOO good, and in all sincerity, it's what keeps the show going. If you're already a subscriber, thank you. If you're not, well, it's never too early to blossom into the patron butterfly THE LORD intended you to be. Do so HERE.
Check out our store at rudetalesofmagic.com for HOT HOT deals on sweet sweet shirts, live show recordings, and more! We got Polaris University sweaters for the cold weather! We thought of everything! And hooboy you're REALLY gonna love the new additions.
And follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.
We're very happy to now publicly thank our exec producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul. Without your support we'd have an actual bucket for a hat, instead of these very nice bucket hats. Thank you.
Our Patreon is INFAMOUS for being TOO good, and in all sincerity, it's what keeps the show going. If you're already a subscriber, thank you. If you're not, well, it's never too early to blossom into the patron butterfly THE LORD intended you to be. Do so HERE.
Check out our store at rudetalesofmagic.com for HOT HOT deals on sweet sweet shirts, live show recordings, and more! We got Polaris University sweaters for the cold weather! We thought of everything! And hooboy you're REALLY gonna love the new additions.
And follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.
We're very happy to now publicly thank our exec producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul. Without your support we'd have an actual bucket for a hat, instead of these very nice bucket hats. Thank you.
This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates all sort of brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.
AND!! The "Trashlands" music appears courtesy of Derek & Brandon Fiechter. You can support them on Bandcamp right here
This episode of Rude Tales of Magic is brought to you by Inked Gaming, your high quality source for table top gaming gear that isn't made of terrible poison like all the other guys, you know the ones! Use code RUDETALES for 10% off at checkout, or don't, your funeral, hotshot!
"Ghost With a Boner" by Diarrhea Planet fucking slaps, and also it appears courtesy of Infinity Cat Recordings. You simply could not spend your music money in a better place.
Check out our store at rudetalesofmagic.com for HOT HOT deals on sweet sweet shirts, live show recordings, and more! We got Polaris University sweaters for the cold weather! We thought of everything! And hooboy you're REALLY gonna see all the new recent stuff.
Our Patreon keeps the lights on and truly, in all sincerity is what keeps the show going. If you're already a subscriber, thank you. If you're not, well, it's never too early to blossom into the patron butterfly THE LORD intended you to be. Do so HERE.
And follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.
We're very happy to now publicly thank our exec producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul. Without your support we'd have an actual bucket for a hat, instead of these very nice bucket hats. Thank you.
This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates all sort of brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.
AND!! The "Trashlands" music appears courtesy of Derek & Brandon Fiechter. You can support them on Bandcamp right here
This episode of Rude Tales of Magic is brought to you by Inked Gaming, your high quality source for table top gaming gear that isn't made of terrible poison like all the other guys, you know the ones! Use code RUDETALES for 10% off at checkout, or don't, your funeral, hotshot!
Check out our store at rudetalesofmagic.com for HOT HOT deals on sweet sweet shirts, live show recordings, and more! We got Polaris University sweaters for the cold weather! We thought of everything!
Our Patreon keeps the lights on and truly, in all sincerity is what keeps the show going. If you're already a subscriber, thank you. If you're not, well, it's never too early to blossom into the patron butterfly THE LORD intended you to be. Do so HERE.
And follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.
We're very happy to now publicly thank our exec producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul. Without your support we'd have an actual bucket for a hat, instead of these very nice bucket hats. Thank you.
This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates all sort of brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.
AND!! The "Trashlands" music appears courtesy of Derek & Brandon Fiechter. You can support them on Bandcamp right here
ANSWER TO RIDDLE: I am that book you ate.
Check out our store at rudetalesofmagic.com for HOT HOT deals on sweet sweet shirts, live show recordings, and more! We got Polaris University sweaters for the cold weather! We thought of everything!
Our Patreon keeps the lights on and truly, in all sincerity is what keeps the show going. If you're already a subscriber, thank you. If you're not, well, it's never too early to blossom into the patron butterfly THE LORD intended you to be. Do so HERE.
And follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.
We're very happy to now publicly thank our exec producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul. Without your support we'd have an actual bucket for a hat, instead of these very nice bucket hats. Thank you.
This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates all sort of brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.
AND!! The "Trashlands" music appears courtesy of Derek & Brandon Fiechter. You can support them on Bandcamp right here
Tickets for the next live show are on sale NOW at rudetalesofmagic.com.
Our Patreon keeps the lights on and truly, in all sincerity is what keeps the show going. If you're already a subscriber, thank you. If you're not, well, it's never too early to blossom into the patron butterfly THE LORD intended you to be. Do so HERE.
And follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.
We're very happy to now publicly thank our exec producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul. Without your support we'd have an actual bucket for a hat, instead of these very nice bucket hats. Thank you.
This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates all sort of brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.
AND!! The "Trashlands" music appears courtesy of Derek & Brandon Fiechter. You can support them on Bandcamp right here
Tickets for the Halloween live show are on sale NOW at rudetalesofmagic.com.
Our Patreon keeps the lights on and truly, in all sincerity is what keeps the show going. If you're already a subscriber, thank you. If you're not, well, it's never too early to blossom into the patron butterfly THE LORD intended you to be. Do so HERE.
And follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.
We're very happy to now publicly thank our exec producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul. Without your support we'd have an actual bucket for a hat, instead of these very nice bucket hats. Thank you.
This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates all sort of brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.
AND!! The "Trashlands" music appears courtesy of Derek & Brandon Fiechter. You can support them on Bandcamp right here
Get more content like this: the Rude Crew plays horror, sci fi, and...animal-based...ttrpgs all on our award winning* Patreon!
Check out all the cool stuff on rudetalesofmagic.com. Like our new Polaris University hoodies and sweatshirts. Wow look at that. Neat!
The kickstarter for the new Fortunate Horse tabletop game, As You Wich, is RIGHT HERE.
Our Patreon keeps the lights on and truly, in all sincerity is what keeps the show going. If you're already a subscriber, thank you. If you're not, well, it's never too early to blossom into the patron butterfly THE LORD intended you to be. Do so HERE.
And follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.
We're very happy to now publicly thank our new producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul, and our newest addition, JTrofe. Without your support we'd have an actual bucket for a hat, instead of these very nice bucket hats. Thank you.
This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates all sort of brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.
AND!! The "Trashlands" music appears courtesy of Derek & Brandon Fiechter. You can support them on Bandcamp right here
Lasers and Feelings is one page, free, by John Harper, and you can get it here: http://www.onesevendesign.com/laserfeelings/
ALSO
Fortunate Horse, the studio behind Rude Tales of Magic is launching our very first GAME! It's called As You 'Wich, and yes it is about sandwiches.
It's easy, it's funny and it's very affordable. Get yours riiiight here.
RIGHT NOW GO TO RUDETALESOFMAGIC.COM, for for tickets to our first live stream THIS FRIDAY, the 28th! Hurry!
Our Patreon keeps the lights on and truly, in all sincerity is what keeps the show going. If you're already a subscriber, thank you. If you're not, well, it's never too early to blossom into the patron butterfly THE LORD intended you to be. Do so HERE.
And follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.
We're very happy to now publicly thank our new producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul. Without your support we'd have an actual bucket for a hat, instead of these very nice bucket hats.
This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates all sort of brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.
RIGHT NOW GO TO RUDETALESOFMAGIC.COM, for we have our VERY FIRST merch on sale now! It's t-shirts! For YOUR body! There's one with a skull and one with just words. What are ya gonna do walk around topless all day? What if the neighbors/students/parishoners see? Better get a shirt on!
Our Patreon keeps the lights on and truly, in all sincerity is what keeps the show going. If you're already a subscriber, thank you. If you're not, well, it's never too early to blossom into the patron butterfly THE LORD intended you to be. Do so HERE.
And follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.
We're very happy to now publicly thank our new producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul. Without your support we'd have an actual bucket for a hat, instead of these very nice bucket hats.
This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates all sort of brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.
RIGHT NOW GO TO RUDETALESOFMAGIC.COM, for we have our VERY FIRST merch on sale now! It's tshirts! For YOUR body! Theres one with a skull and one with just words. What are ya gonna do walk around topless all day? What if the neighbors/students/parishoners see? Better get a shirt on!
Our Patreon keeps the lights on and truly, in all sincerity is what keeps the show going. If you're already a subscriber, thank you. If you're not, well, it's never too early to blossom into the patron butterfly THE LORD intended you to be. Do so HERE.
And follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun! And it's probably the best way to contact us, all things considered.
We're very happy to now publicly thank our new producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul. Without your support we'd be eating cat food at a higher frequency than we do currently.
This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates all sort of brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.
Our Patreon keeps the lights on and truly, in all sincerity is what keeps the show going. If you're already a subscriber, thank you. If you're not, well, it's never too early to blossom into the patron butterfly THE LORD intended you to be. Do so HERE.
And follow us on twitter for goodness sake, it's fun!
We're very happy to now publicly thank our new producers, Sydney and Benjamin Paul. Without your support we'd be eating cat food at a higher frequency than we do currently.
This episode features additional sound design by Michaël Ghelfi. Michaël creates all sort of brilliantly crafted soundscapes and ambient tracks for all sort of productions and they make perfect accompaniment to your ttrpg home games. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.
If you're at all able, consider giving to Black and Pink, an incredible organization dedicated to dismantling the criminal punishment system and the harms caused to LGBTQ+ people and people living with HIV/AIDS who are affected by the system through advocacy, support, and organizing.
And then, follow us on Twitter.
And and also too, good lord, come on, we gotta say it again? Get us on Patreon dog! It's a gd world o'wonders over there.
If you're at all able, consider giving to Black and Pink, an incredible organization dedicated to dismantling the criminal punishment system and the harms caused to LGBTQ+ people and people living with HIV/AIDS who are affected by the system through advocacy, support, and organizing.
And then, follow us on Twitter.
And and also too, good lord, come on, we gotta say it again? Get us on Patreon dog! It's a gd world o'wonders over there.
We thought that while we're locked out of the studio due to NeoPlague, we'd nonetheless keep recording (We would never call ourselves heroes, but you are of course welcome to.) Only this time we'd tell a whole new story (same vibe) with whole new characters (somehow even dumber), exploring the world of Cordelia's bonkers past (like its present but over).
No need to worry, the original gang will return as soon as they can. Until then though, WE HAVE SUCH SIGHTS TO SHOW YOU.
Recently recovered Cordelian artifacts have revealed themselves to be semi-permanent (and quickly degrading), solidified auditory illusion spells, created by mage, historian, and naturalist, Thimbit Leavings, an unknown number of years ago in an attempt to document and market a collection of recorded sounds cataloging the entire natural, political, and cultural history of Cordelia.
We will be sharing them with you at random.
We are just thrilled as a cricket and pleased as a pretty peach pie to have Brennan Lee Mulligan as our first guest star. Brennan has been a huge influence on the show from before our first episode, is one of the greatest living Dungeon Masters and, good news for you, you can watch him work his magic on the hilarious and brilliant actual play show, Dimension 20 (youtube) (twitter) (insta) If you like Rude Tales, you are commanded to check out Dimension 20. Godspeed, lil bodhisattva.
Our patreon gets better and better day by day by day. Won't you join us?
Sorry we don't have a patreon.
Wow, just imagine how much more cool stuff you could enjoy if you supported the show on our FANTASTIC PATREON
THE gold-standard discord community!
Actual plays of whole other games!
hang out with us on twitch (we stream so much now)!
Radio Free Cordelia (a pirate radio show made by the cast)!
etc etc etc
We're on TWITCH NOW! Follow us there to hang out, and do tons of fun stuff like read, drink, learn, play, and avoid the end of the world with us! Please, we NEED human contact.
And ya GOTTA follow us on twitter.
Wait a minute, you know we have the best patreon in the world, right? Good.
This week we are pleased as punch to feature the work of Ben Kling and Rachel Wenitsky!
Ben arranged and produced Scrum's Theme, with Rachel on the pipes (the human throat pipes), with words and melody by lil' Tim Platt.
Check out more of their wonderful bidness here:
Ben Kling on Soundcloud (a must) and Twitter
Rachel Wenitsky on Twitter and at home.
And of course, ya gotta give it up for the Patreon.
Look, the patreon is good. We saved a seat for you.
Additional music this week from Ben Kling (click that link, handsome, his soundcloud is incredible)! We'll have much more about (and from him) very soon, so stay tuned ;)
We got a LIVE show coming up and tickets are going FAST. Get yours right now for January 23rd at the historic Union Hall.----> here.
And baby, if you want this show to keep going, get yourself over to that yonder Patreon, and secure your seat beyond the velvet rope. Come inside weary traveler. The discord is FUN, the premium show is ADULT and HOT, the art is DANGEROUS, and the other stuff is TOO INTENSE to describe. I guess you could say it's not your father's actual play podcast Patreon ;)
CW: gore, death, family
Exhausted and fed up, our heroes battle and cajole their way through the last leg of the Teenage Woods and its ridiculous denizens. But what lies beyond?
After all this, can you go home again? And what might you find there?
Can our heroes bear the revelations of the Dawn house?
Can you?
The gang is whisked away by a malevolent, though romantic, force who will pry every secret from their most hidden hearts! Can they survive his psychological gauntlet? What truth will out?
This was our first ever live show, recorded in Brooklyn New York, with an audience of just Patrons. If you'd like to come to a live taping like this one, support us on Patreon!
This week we're happy to once again be sponsored by Shaker & Spoon. Get your head in the game and get the perfect holiday gift for allllmost anyone by going riiight here. It's a great way to support the show, and for once your family will love you. For real though, we actually tried it and it's very, very good.
If you're not on the patreon, you're trash. Sorry!
Run don't walk to go support synthwave master HOME @ https://music.midwestcollective.us/album/before-the-night
The album (our fave) is only $2!! Go get it now!
